Living in the light of love It comes upon me like a white dove And the Holy Spirit bequeaths its gifts Without you ever asking for it And I made my Confirmation It was with a kind of elation As I was conferred with the blessings of God So much more by love than by the rod
I've got a nickname And it should be proof That I do not live my life aloof But streak in hair And fabric that would dare To set alight And be the fire To burn by night To light the way Of all the wanderers who stay On the beaten track Now there is no way to turn back On my side once more In grace I do adore The reflection of your face I'm seeing you every place I go or roam and for a moment You were home But I guess I see I have gone astray And must refind the way By the light of love Descended on me like a white dove Or fire and tongues What it is to be young

Why do I still love you It should be through And over and done But you're still the one I hitch my wagon to In the dark And the light without you Is bare and stark And everytime I hear your name Something inside me starts As the cobwebs are pulled apart By effortless hands And the slipping sands Of time mean nothing now Though as for what the space allow I cannot say Only you were the light of day A little too soon I visualise you in my room Talking to me or looking that way And to God I still pray That you're okay And I stay At the centre of circle or wheel Of the heart that you steal Everytime you smile at me And, Lord, you will always be Like a tower to be seen I think you were the answer to a dream
I will sing aloud And let my voice be spoken to the crowd No more dark silence here But a chasm that's held dear To emptiness expand In miles I hadn't planned To have to walk But it's all talk Til I open out the way Then everything I say Is hitting the mark And the spark Has become a flame That sets fire to my name And be reborn Like a phoenix rising from ashes warm And the storm Goes quiet once more Everything I do adore

The creative impulse Eats me up You could call it A kind of love But it's relentless It knows no way To be easy On me today The creative fire The divine spark Knows how To tear me apart

A wasted desert city In an island of storm And I was only tryin' To keep myself warm But I've journeyed miles Away from home And it is with loneliness That I roam For you were a tower You were complete And I'm always falling down At your feet But you pick me up With my cryin' eyes See through layers Of my disguise And it's ancient And ever new And you're saying I mean the world to you
Eternity and Infinity Time and space And I'm stepping out Of the human race And the draw it pulls But I resist I want to do more Than merely exist And your candlelight is pure But I want the sun Want to do more Than just be someone And everywhere I go And each place I turn I feel the chasm grow And the fire burn But it's not for you And it isn't for me I don't know why it's there I'll have to just see And you walked my way And our arms brushed But I know better Than to be rushed So I take my time In staking you out Before I let loose What I am about And you run away Like I thought you would And I am still standing Alone in the wood
I acquiesce to the power Of a higher hand It uses me in ways I don't understand It moves me here And then to go I follow But I just don't know Who it is I'm going to be There is a path And it's leading me To blaze anew Through the fog To lead with love And not the rod To point the way In the dark Be headlights Or a holy spark Be afresh Be anew Be myself Just for you
How can I be devoted to someone Looking through a windowpane It is ardent, it is true But is it all in vain Because he doesn't believe A single word I'm saying So all my tears come down Falling like the rain And he has a girl So how do I compete When I'm a mess of hair Falling at his feet It's just that he makes me Feel so damn complete And I cannot deny The cuteness when we meet And is it all a movie scene Do I play the damsel in distress And is he the hero To save me and the rest And could you call this anything But a fair request I was dancing in the storm In my favourite dress And where do we go from here Is it a nothing that we are Am I Victoria And not the fallen star I just know that he has Every piece of my heart Held within a frame Where they once were apart And is this all nonsense I'm scribbling on a page I was close to crying And he was full of rage But, oh, the image of you It could stand for an age When you're talking to me I am not afraid And I cannot find the answer Nor can I write it out It seemed you played a song That is what I'm about And I cannot not hear When you veritably shout And all the words are Just spilling from my mouth And does it matter what they all think Does it matter what they say Because I really don't think This feeling's going away And I wished I had asked you Years ago to stay And not degenerate Into a child's play So who am I to you now Am I anything at all Because I've been calling for you For eons down the hall And each and everytime I meet with a brick wall Just before I go Freefalling through it all And we have friends in common Is it just a Facebook scene Am I Katy Perry And you the teenage dream And are all the cobwebs Not what they may seem You stun me like a laser Coming through on a moonbeam And if it all is worthless And left in the past Is there any room For me still to ask Can we be on friendly terms In the sun to bask Because I know within That this is built to last And if I'm really crazy You know I was locked up Is there space to verbalise Just what I'm thinking of Is it against your wishes That I might call this love And bless it with the rain That falls from above
Do I have to let it all go Everything, everyone To radiate the light Of the Son And I've always loved Jesus He is my defender He's been there since Before I can remember And he picked me up When the going got tough Was the dry land When the seas got rough And I've changed so deeply And in so many ways But I'm still the same Or so He says And love is not antithetical To devotion When it is ardent and true And not all commotion And he has placed a man At the forefront of my gaze That I can share life with For the rest of my days And do I refuse Do I turn him down This ocean is not A place I want to drown
There's nothing I can say That explains what I mean The closest I can come to Is that life's a dream But that's even in the story It's not waking up I guess you could call it A kind of love But it's not static It's dynamic and moving Like clouds on the run That needs no improving And I want to say That you should trust yourself Don't be depending On anyone else Not even on me And the light I see In the depths of my heart Is where you'll always be Not hidden away But burning with fire All heat from the furnace That only gets higher
Am I wearing Malas to the Supreme Waking up Though I'm still in a dream And is it Grace All of the falling apart I can't deny That I've got heart And are my assumptions To the contrary unfounded Was it through open fields I bounded And I can feel it lift Here or there The tumbling structures That I wear And do we build God Or is he real And is realisation More than just what I feel
The lonely sound Of Lightbody's voice The soundscape of my life And I never did become a wife And was that just an ambition Or did it require my volition It's just that I've wandered miles and traversed seas Of all I never got to be's But love, oh love, has never left me Since the day that we met I don't know how you could think That I forget But your beautiful mind Is forever engrained It overcomes The way I've been trained And I'll sing this song And I'll toast to you Because you overcame What I wanted you to
Is it alright to be happy? Is it okay to be fine? Because I've spent years Just trying not to step out of line But the wellbeing is just there Like an ever abundant source And the people are all miserable How is it that I show no remorse For being so effortlessly good It was a gift from on high It just happened to me so suddenly I don't have a reason why
What's love got to do with it? I wonder and pray and ask I never get an answer though Is it coz I'm not up to the task And my whole heart's been given I don't know if I'll ever get it back I just know it's overflowing And there's nothing there I lack And the feeling is so crystalline It could a diamond reflect A symbol of the Infinite On a string around my neck And could these three sages be Salvation do you think? I just know they're the ocean And in it I want to sink
Out on the run Where it begun To catch my trail And without fail I blaze diamonds Into the Infinite And now it is All catching light
I'm finding it hard to fight the feeling of fear That I could lose all I hold dear And it is so crystal clear That I won't win the war this time It's fading into the light sublime As all is taken up in heaven's glance And I don't need a second chance To wonder if it's all okay Dawn is just the start of the day
The darkness is all consuming But I fight it out And none of these people Know what I'm about As I walk with the storm Through a thundercloud I will speak my voice And I'll speak it aloud
There’s no pain or suffering in the Great Divine
And I guess you could say it’s always been mine
But there have been days that lasted all night
As I clung to the handrail of being alright
And there have been years that passed in a flash
Like the bad weather when the rain starts to lash
And I don’t really know who I am anymore
I know I’ve been knocking for years at that door
Without ever really getting a reply
But in this garden I can see the sky
And the stars all flicker for me, a million dancing lights
Burning spheres of fire that the night ignites
And if you could tell me where I should have been, well I guess I’d go
But there’s something in this moment no one seems to know
Something that’s held firm, something that’s held true
Something that could bridge the gap between me and you
And I’ve always written my best work when I should be asleep
And in all this time you’re what I keep
Hidden between the folds amd creases
It is a love that never ceases
You could call it forever or unconditional
You could call it that sip of tea when your cup is full
And I don’t know what to say anymore to anyone
If I’ve rolled with the ocean you could say my time is done
As the world collapse inside me like a beautiful black hole
And I am drawn within by my very soul
To a place I can’t escape, though I wouldn’t want to anyway
There’s nothing more to do and no more to say
Except I love you always and always will be
The diamond in my heart, yours eternally
Image Source: https://pin.it/6vGHSys
The freedom of the word
It demands to be spoken
It doesn’t care about time
Or about what’s broken
Because everything’s fine
In eternity’s eyes
And it demands
That I shed my disguise
And stand afresh
With newborn faith
To bask in love
And take from the hate
Because the world’s spinning round
But nobody sees
That we’re living like reeds
Tossed in the breeze
At the edge of the lake
For goodness sake
We’ve been too long
In the dreams that we make
And living like thieves
Out on the run
Only lasts so long
Until you’re undone
World weary, is that what I am?
And is life more than I can understand?
More than growing up through years
Or walking the valley in the shadow of tears
But one thing here I must confess
In spite of all of my distress
That I have faith that is ever true
To the Lord inside each one of you
No dressing up, no playing games
And it goes by a multitude of names
But my favourite one might just be heart
And we all have a share in part
To love with the heat of fire warm
In it I take shelter from the storm
By the hearth as the windows rattle
I don't think love's meant to be a battle
But only with open arms to say
I love you and I hope that's okay
I hope that's alright as the winds blow
I told you now so I guess you know
I can never hold it back
This wordsmith inside of me
As I am ever critical
Of what I try to be
But I’ve got words, Lord
And they keep on coming
Like a train on a track
Or Usain Bolt when he’s runnin’
And what do you think they mean
When they are pouring forth
Are they just another outdoor game
I play when I’m bored
But no, I have to believe
It is something more
That it is the sound of Truth
Knocking on my door
And is anyone home?
Do I undo the latch?
Because this fire in me
Burns like flames and thatch
And I can never put it out
The whole sky could rain on me
And I’d still be smokin’
With all I’m meant to be
So I will be the candlelight
To light the road aflame
And become much more
Than the letters in my name
And if you’ve got a midnight
Well, I have had one too
Til He set me afire
And he’ll do the same to you
If it’s what you really want
To have courage in your soul
And be the tide that is forever
Caught within the roll
Caught within the wave
That crashes on the shore
And like a beach I live my life
Always there for more
Its in the way
The photons hit the wall
Its in the way
I’m freefalling through it all
And no one hears my thunder
No one hears my cry
And I’m not sure why
I keep on passing by
Never leaving a name
Or an imprint on the sand
And though this was a journey
None of it was planned
Only opening out
Into the great expanse
Life is the dancer
And I guess I am the dance

The I knows itself
I don’t know it
But its something
I’m going with
It weaves itself
A tapestry
Always proclaiming
To be free
And what of
The one who sees
The forest is
Full of trees
Til aham-vritti
Finds its way
Back into what
I cannot say
But always driven
There to find
A somewhere that
Is beyond the mind

Wind assisted by grace
The kind of support you can’t erase
Only say thank you into the night
Thank the heavens I am alright
And come around once more to be
Kneeling in prayer at the foot of thee
Oh holy mountain, Arunachala, hear
To you I am always held dear
Always held close, you let me know
That where I follow, you will go
Only to be ripened like fruit on a tree
I was looking and you found me
Source: https://www.davidgodman.org/the-power-of-arunachala/
The light of your grace is shining on me
Even though in the dark I can see
And am guided to home once more again
Always returning to remember when
Outside of time and outside of space
Outside of identity, but not out of place
I saw you like a hero
Like a saviour in the stream
Like a wild songwriter
Surfing a moonbeam
And you have got your failings
As everybody must
And though I see them clearly
There’s something I still trust
Like the darkness in your eye
Unconquerable and deep
Or the innocence of a child
Lost in a sleep
And I know that I can’t have you
Im not sure if I ever could
I just wrote to tell you honestly
That I still would
Hold your hand so gently
So softly and sincere
You still mean it all
It all to me, my dear
A world without hunger
A world without pain
I come in from the showers
And out of the rain
And I encourage all you
To do the same
The heart of life
Is the beauty we name
The darkness in me
Is like a great ocean
And I am on
The surface in motion
Always moving
With each roll
Giving everything
Inside my soul
But I am more
Than just a ship
I am everything
The waves equip
And I know
That in each fall
There arises
More wherewithal
To deal with life
As it comes
I am not one
Who succumbs
To the weight
Of everything
The water’s deep
But I can swim
Image Credit: https://pin.it/51Fcdli
You’re too beautiful
To be believed
And yes, I guess
I was deceived
When I thought
I could have you for my own
Now all the cards are shown
And where are we
Standing in the middle
I have to say
This love’s a riddle
To me at least
I can’t figure out
If it’s a famine or feast
But its always there
I swear
Like breathing in air
I still love him
Even though years have gone by
And though I try
This love just won’t die
It seems to go on forever
And though I endeavour
To quieten it
It shouts itself aloud
And says “Here!
This is what Im about”
As distinct from the crowd
Though Im essentially the same
Don’t make me take the blame
When we were in this together
You can’t blame the sun for the bad weather
And we were part of a community
Of thieves and liars and on-the-runs
Don’t look at me now
And say that we’re done
When forever’s in our blood
And in our bones
And everywhere we go
Is home
As the apple fell from the tree
So did love fall from me
And you could call it gravity
Its more than words could ever be
The Lord and Saviour
The Light Supreme
Was what woke me
From the dream
His hand
Upon my shoulder blade
It was I, the girl
He saved
Saved from
Running the mill
Effortless
In fields I till
But do you know
What counted the most
Was that he sent
The Holy Ghost
To always be there
By my side
In Light and Love
I do abide
I’ll never stop staring into space
Or the world that knows your face
When did I lose faith in the human race
When did I find walls to disgrace
When did I get so tired and old
Why did I decide to do what I’m told
Til it all bursts to colours afresh
That colours me red in my undress
In a dark grey casket of absent Being
In the terror of not knowing what I’m seeing
In the joy of a fragrance untold
In the willingness to just be bold
In the love of arms that hold me close
In the Name of the Father, Son and Holy Ghost
The wise old owl inside of me
Knows exactly who to be
Knows exactly what to say
When people are talking my way
And I don’t ask, it just answers
Im not the dance, I am the dancer
And it craves subtle release
When my lips give in to speak
Exactly what’s been burgeoning
I listen to its urging
When it rises up to sea
And moves the ocean inside of me
When it understands the fold
That wise old owl does what its told
The origin trailer of my release
Or am I just lost in belief
Is this dream real, is this dream true
Or is it just me running from you
Running from ordinary life as it is
Running from someone who says that I’m his
Running from growing old by degrees
Or is it just me living life on the breeze
Going with the flow that calls me forth
Opening doors I couldn’t recourse
Calling all angles, calling all sides
Calling all people who breathe “I’m alive”
And will I let my immortal die
Invicible inside that can never lie
Only bow gently and slip outside
Think of other ways to uncover the hide
Because deep blue is a fantastic hue
But it isn’t much good just sitting in you
I must be away so that I can paint
All thanks to the time when love made me faint
With her lightning strike to lighten the mood
The veil of depression in which I brood
In which I sit and contemplate
I’m always nostalgic for that state
For in the present tense where I sit
Nothing holds fast if I grasp at it
Not even darkness, that brilliant bold
You should know better, I hear wisdom scold
Til I finally conceed to the rebirth
How is it I’m sorry that I cannot hurt
How is it I’m slow to let midnight go
You train her hard, but she must never know
Know who she is, know what you are
Til you’re ready to point to the North Star
Who am I to be
Who am I to go
Who am I to stand
When I just do not know
But the standing stands itself
On a wire or a string
I may be clueless
But it knows everything
To pull me from my socks
Back into my boots
To pull me like a tree
Up from solid roots
And it may have its reason
(It doesn’t have a rhyme)
All I know is that it says
Baby, it is time
I saw Jesus in your eyes
Did I ever tell you so
Well I wasn’t supposed to
So I guess that’s a no
And I’d always loved
My hidden Saviour
He never reprimanded
Me my behaviour
Only spoke softly
To point out the way
Picked me up from the earth
When it wasn’t going away
And for a moment
I thought you had stole
The power of safety
The man in my soul
So I turned away
Only to hide
I’ve got to keep
My Jesus alive
But there’s an impending
Crucifixtion
I wonder can you read it
In my diction
Artwork: Jared Emerson – Face of God
I saw the shadow of my soul in the indent of his eyes
I took it on the chin and it took me by surprise
Like the sun and the moon forever apart
Until that time of day when they both take heart
And you’re not a perfect person, I could list your flaws
And there is an ice inside that never thaws
But I saw you in the ash though you hid in the smoke
And you handed me a fiver when I was going broke
But I am no beggar, at least not anymore
And I am tired of knocking at the same damn door
When I know the truth is this, you’re not who I sought
Although you just might be the best lie I ever bought
I keep tryin to fix it
When its not broken
Everybody knows
You can’t speak the unspoken
Everybody knows
You can’t be the unborn
Only relinquish
The clothing of form
Image Credit: https://with-omraam.com/blog/like-marriage-god-wife-isis/
A mysterious presence
An unspeakable quiet
My life was a hoot
Man it was a riot
Til it all burned down
Back into ash
I once was impulsive
Yeah I used to be rash
Go storming in
And storming back out
Never knowing when
To shut my mouth
As the chains encircled
I felt the vice
Til it trapped me there
It wasn’t nice
Then she walked right in
With the softest arms
Told me she’d
Keep me from harm
Told me she’d
Never let me go
And, well
She didn’t, you know
And the blush it colours
Her cheeks so red
Every time I repeat
Just what she said
That she loved me so
And would always be
Here with me
Eternally
Its not something about you
Its intrinsicality
And I am only now
Beginning to see
That the same is true
For my own dear self
Indeed if we are talking
Is there anybody else
It was nothing that you said
It was nothing that you did
It was just the simple light
The simple light that’s his
That shines from every eye
From each and every pair
A subtle reminder
Of something that is there
But when I look in the mirror
All vacant and numb
Losing the looks
I never had when I was young
I see nothing but peace
Papered over with skin
Its nothing about me
Its just that I am him
Image Credit : nsn on Pinterest
It doesn’t matter if I’m strong
It doesn’t matter if I’m weak
It doesn’t matter if I’m silent
Or have the strength to speak
All it hangs upon
Is a hook upon the wall
And I am not
Responsible for it all
For every passing tide
For every passing wind
For every passing person
Who tells me they have sinned
All that I can know
And all that I can be
Is the hole that perforates
What it means to be free
Image Credit: © Digitized Sky Survey (DSS), STScI/AURA, Palomar/Caltech, and UKSTU/AAO
Just be the Self
Then you don’t need anything else
Stop trying to feed the lame and poor
And just walk out of the damn door
See here, it’s held ajar
The light streaming from the car
The riverboat that you can’t save
If you don’t know just turn the page
And your excuses hold no ground
They slip away like falling sound
In a mudslide you’ll lose your house
Unless you’re rooted in the grouse
So don’t come to me with your tears and folly
Admonishment of the holly
Just stand up and be stone strong
Take your place where you belong
I could stay in this state forever
Is that a measure of the heather
Is that a measure of the heat
Of what I stumble underneath
You can’t choose what stays and what fades away
How do I find peace in the noise
The clatter of ruaille buaille and toys
The rising crescendo of an indefatigable sound
That only arises when you are around
And I find peace in the silence or subtle vibrations
But it never remembers me in its elation
Only go sidewiding down its own hill
Wandering, weaving past me at will
And I can’t capture, no I can’t contain
But when I lie, I do it in vain
For the Hammer finds its way
Back to my door til it has its say
Leave up your tools
Leave up your weapons
Your weariness
And your confessions
Your striving to
Be better than most
Your kneeling to
The Holy Ghost
Give it all up
And follow me now
Into the depths
Of what I’ll allow
Into the chasm
A cave of sorts
There’s no one left
With whom to consort
Give up your tired
Old way of thieving
And all your absence
Of believing
All the ways
You rid yourself
Of the world
And everything else
Give up the struggle
For you’ve struggled in vain
To hold my hand
Under the rain
I bring the Sun
For I am That
Follow me now
And don’t look back