Soliloquies

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I don’t want to start a fight
I don’t wannna take aim
It’s just I catch my breath
When I see her name
Next to yours instead of mine
It walks over me like a thousand times
And I know she’s real nice but I would wait
Until you trace the hands of fate
And saw it bring you to my side
In your presence I’m alive
And soaring like a bird in flight
And I know you might be alright
But I’m nothing without you my sweetest babe
I don’t even have the room to save
Myself from the gnashing of teeth
I think I’m stranded on the beach
Waiting for my ship to come in
And don’t you know it’s always Him
No matter what is said to deter
And I just wish the best for her
Because she kept you close when times were tough
And my excuse is simply not enough
And I know I was away
And you would always say
You wanted someone
And being too young
Is no reason to protest
I looked away, you did the rest
As the cymbal clattered to the floor
And I’ve never wanted anything more
Than I want you now
But I gotta give space to allow
You to have your breathing room
I loved you too late after too soon
Coz you stride across the hill
I look up and still
I see you standing there
With the wind in your hair
And your magnitude
Just a really cool dude
To open my eyes into
I know it’s not enough that you
Loved me then before I let you go
I’m writing this so you know
That your soul has a place beside the embers I warm
And you can chill by the heat of the storm
And I know it’s really bad form
To tell you this now when true love has been born
And I see you with her
And what we were
Is just echoes now in my mind
As I’m sad over what I’ve left behind
And you say it’s gone
But I can hear it in that song
You play when you think nobody cares
But I look through it all with devil may cares
And your silhouette
Is not something I could ever forget
As the stars
Make magical music out of the bars
That hold me in
If only I could get to him
But it’s a futile shot
He only sees all that I’m not
Nor could be
I amn’t she
And we
Eternity
Could never refresh
The page easily
As a new sky dawns
And our youth is almost nearly gone
Eaten up by time
Like the melody you sang with the line
When you didn’t know
That you are everywhere I go
In college days
I find you there in so many ways
Just a glance
A laugh, a second chance
The fear
The feeling you close as though you are near
In the library
But you’re kissing her beside me
I just don’t see
Til now, at least, an infinity
And, love, will you ever know
That I stared at you headlong until I go
Back to your door
Rap a knock like a mini score
But you adore
The Goddess you found by the shore
And I know
Though I implore
Everything’s settled on the ground floor
And foundations deep
Underlie all that you intend to keep
And just a day
A million light years away
Can’t convince
You to change your mind since
I showed up
I don’t even know if you could call this love
It’s just you’re everything I’m thinking of
And the sky
Holds nothing to the blue of your eye
Black hole deep
Full of the light that it will keep
From a million stars that throw away
Their beams to your frame as you walk away
And I
Will love you like this til the day that I die
And cry
That we never got to be
As he takes the role of the quintessential he
Of my dreams
I know it’s not all that it seems
And I’m not Einstein
But would I be a fool to call you mine
In another dimension
One without all the surface tension
And suspense
We climbed out of both of our tents
Never knowing what’s in store
Where the zip on the line made way for a door
And you, effervescent you, just laugh
You don’t do things by half
Do you
And if it means that much to
You I will love her too
Celebrate the days of you
Two down in the park
Before I even knew that we start
Oh, the longing to be
Somewhere near your soliloquy
But it just rhymes somewhere in the distance
And I give up on the resistance
And allow
You to live your own life somehow
Just know
I love you deep like the mountain of snow
That rolls down avalanche cloud
My voice is shaking but I say it out loud
And the words don’t make sense and you’re shouting at me
Something about nothing and our history
And the lines blur
You were always with her
In the years
And the tears
And you see
This, you and I, and Infinity

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