Along Came Stephen

It was years
Since I stopped believing
I opened the door
And along came Stephen 
He reminded me 
With his casual eyes
That even a stranger
Can see through disguise
And all of the advances 
I couldn't stop making 
Were held in suspense
With the breath I was taking 
And it was ancient
Yes it was old
But this was a story
That's never been told
That's always been waiting
In the wings
I know it's a bird
Because, my Lord, it sings
And reverberates
Without any doubt
Can I trust the words
That pour from my mouth
And herald a new dawn 
One that's bursting forth
And the river is free
Though it runs its course
And brings it back 
To rain in the sky 
I wonder do you
Know it's a lie
When I look away 
From your brief glance
It was heaven
It was happenstance
It was a moment
And it was soul 
He blinked his eyes
And the waves roll 

Lenses

Do I set diagrams spiraling out into the wind
And is to be alive to say I have sinned
Coz there's all of this perfect I won't get to be 
I'm just clearing my eyes so I can really see
And what does the lens do to the light
It focuses it on the retina, right? 
Then the brain turns the picture the right way round
Like the way it interprets sound
And do you ever wonder about the mystery we are
How the atoms inside us are the same as a star
And we have galaxies within our soul 
It's only the body that's getting old

Stairwell

All my life I've been standing on the stairs
No putting on graces, I'm not putting on airs
I'm not trying to be better than I've become
I'm just opening up and letting the One
Move through me like a river to sea
I don't know where I'm going or what I'll be
All I know is I feel the pull
And the longing start to dull
As it unfolds unto a new expanse
I watch the whole world start to dance
To the music of a perfect refrain
It's being lifted out of the pain
It is being called at the edge of the circle
On the rock we call Earth as it begins to hurtle
Through the density of time-space
And you can see through the dreams that you chase
As you find yourself back in the same old place
Believe and relive the burden you face 

Smile

He's got a smile in his eyes
It's like a diamond I try on for size
As everything fits in a perfect whole
And he is speaking directly to soul
Directly to Immortal Being
There is no end to this seeing
To the avalanche of earth
That goes beyond the ways of hurt
That goes beyond the depths of feeling
It's shattering the glass ceiling 
That keeps us all beneath the sky
He whispers truths and I don't know why
But they call to something deep within
It goes beyond the realm of sin
Beyond the doubt of discourse
Love is an insurmountable force
And knows no bounds and knows no end
It's everything that it will mend
So that we all face the sun
If you're looking for it, well you're the One

Deluge

The rain pours on me
It's like a deluge
As I find a place
Where I can take refuge
Where I can be safe
And I can be serene
Not always threatened
By what I dream 
And I love always
And I love long
And I want love to be
The heart of my song
As I play it for you
The whole of creation
It's a little bit sad
But filled with elation
Filled with the expanse
Of the whole Universe
Though my sorrow has made me
A little bit terse
But I give it the full 
Of all that I've got
And you must know
I love you a lot
With all that I am 
With all I'll ever be
I let the chains go
And find I am free

Love

I love so much
I feel I will burst
This feeling courses
Through the very worst

Through all of the liking
And ticking the box
I find I am open
Without any locks

And it just moves its own way
In a flow, in a beat
And I find I am standing 
On my own two feet

As I build on foundations
Solid as a rock
Am I okay? 
Well, is the sun hot

Just like my heart
In rhythms it's own 
I may not be adult
But I am grown

Wings

I believe in the sky
To conquer the weather
And there are ways
To see through forever
To make it one
Under the rain
Say you'll never go back
To that place again
But you find the door
Ready to be knocked
You don't try the handle
Coz you know it is locked
But you hope and have faith
Trust and believe
In the strength you
Have always found underneath
To sail your ship
Once more through the storm
You can't see the sun
But still it is warm 
And you know and you'll be
You'll love and create
Til you open your eyes
And walk out of that state
And find the dawn
That follows dusk
It doesn't take much
Just a little trust 
As you resolve and know
Revolve and be 
In all of this
Your wings are free

Interdependency

I'm building a home
Out of all that I've seen
And there are ways
To wake from the dream 

To give up the long fight
With yourself and the sky
We move and we walk
But we never know why

And life, it is changing
But it's always the same
You were born on this Earth
Without a name

To grow and to learn
To thrive and to be
Always yourself
Quintessentially free

My Share of the Deal

Am I misunderstood
There was a time
They all thought I was good
And had trophies lined up
For me to wear
I stand up 
And the fabric tear
Til I'm reeling in dreams
Colossal and huge
It's like I asked for rain
And there came a deluge
To bucket down
On top of me
But fuck it, it's 
All I got to be
And there's no point complaining
About my share of the deal 
Oceans are weather
And it's the way that I feel 
To finally come home
To who I am 
I move in life
Without a plan

Built on Love

Comparison and judgement 
Destroy the soul 
They make you 
Prematurely old
They only serve
To dim your light
Just surrender
Give up the fight
And come back
To a place called home
Know that you
Are never alone
But always supported
From the ground up
The Universe 
Is built on love

Destiny

I've got a destiny
I can feel it in my bones
And it has something to do 
With saving people's homes
With finding a diagram
That will fit the screen
I have to make reality
Out of the thing I dream 
And the stories I tell 
Myself quietly at night
There has to be a way
To make the world alright
To cause and effect
And point out the tune
And I am not alone
When I'm sitting in my room
When I'm sitting by myself
To ponder life as real 
There has to be more
Than the way we cut the deal

The Cosmic Mind

The cosmic mind
Knows what it's doing
It points out dreams
That are worth pursuing

And I'm so lost 
In the creases and folds
But it breaks a sunrise 
Across the sky it holds

And the horizon 
Is burning red
Til I can't remember 
Where I've been led

Out into the warmth
Of a new day
I'm trusting in it
Anyway

Impact

What is the impact
Of my unemployment
Could I more than say
I don't know where the ploy went
Coz I've up and grown
And true colours have shown
But I still say
I don't know where I'm going
Does a river when it's moving 
Imagine the sea
It's like a premature 
Deciding who to be
As an oak grows upwards
From a single seed
And there are things
That we all need
From the sky to the sun
To the rain in the clouds
How many human beings
Can say that they're proud
Of the life that they're living
Of who they are 
The atoms inside us 
Were forged within a star
So know this once
And know it forever
You are the beauty
The cosmos will treasure
Every day of your life
In the depths of your soul 
Don't stop at okay
Go ahead and be whole 

The Pilfering Midnight

The pilfering midnight
Steals all I ever am
It takes things
I think no one can

As it comes in smooth
And steady waves
And it’s nobody
That it saves

As they all
Just walk the beat
Never really knowing
Their own feet

Superstar

Dreaming about the superstar last night

And I really hope that he’s alright

Because he’s been through tough times too

But you know I could sing along to

Your glorious refrain

You make castles out of the pain

And I could be your princess, dear

The water is so crystal clear

And this is not all you’ll ever be

Now when I’m seeing you with me

The Peace That Passeth Understanding

The peace that passeth understanding

Why build walls when they are demanding

Why build towers and monuments of gold

When all you’re doing is getting old

And seeking to find in outside stone

A refuge and a place called home

When all fades and passes and ebbs away

You must know in your heart what cannot stay

So don’t devote your life to building sand

Or do but know the sea washes the land

And brings back to base, brings to renew

The dreams that we make of me and you

But there is a fountain, a source complete

And it had me bowing at the feet

Of the one that could show me the way

That after night there follows day

And everything is in the cyclical realm

If you are the captain, then who’s at the helm

Of the ship that you’ve been steering

And the way I walk is so endearing

That I must, come what may

Give up my endeavours, just put them away

And concede to be nothing, naught at all

Like the water over a waterfall

Coming down pummelling into the pool

I’m always reminiscing on my days in school

But they are long gone and forever away

And one sure thing about time is that it cannot stay

That experience is bound to disentangle

So don’t get caught up in the mess at an angle

Just live and learn and be and love

And know the messengers from above

Who hold your hands and walk with you

You’re not a body so what could you do

But be the vehicle of the divine

I’m not saying I love you, I’m saying love is mine

And yours and his and hers and ours

Use the faculty of the soul and its powers

To discern what’s true and real

Don’t let life just be a steal

But render the Truth as rugged and pure

As the questions you answer that you know for sure

That you know to be real and honest and right

Don’t settle for a candle when you are the light

Don’t settle for a word when you are the saying

Love always is the source of my praying

Photo by Collins Lesulie on Unsplash

The Captain

Ok, I’ll sail a new ship to the sky

I’m in the water and I don’t know why

Moved by a force I don’t understand

And somehow all of this has been planned

And it’s holding my hand and pointing the way

I’d love to go but I cannot stay

Only be the fortress deep and true

Know who I am when I’m talking to you

When I say the words that are promised of Christ

It may be good but it’s more than nice

And renews all the villages standing on Earth

Relieves the problems and eases the hurts

Cacophonous

The cacophony resounds in my bedroom

It plays to the sound of doom

And I try to run but I can’t get up from the bed

Til I peel myself away from it instead

As the many fangled locket dangles from the sky

Painting a different view, I don’t know why

As I try to overcome my flaws

I be the heat til the icicles thaws

But I’ve been so long in this state

I’m not sure that it would be great

To leave it all behind

The maya mind

And all it bequeaths

But I hear the call to kneel at the Guru’s feet

And you could call it many things

You could call it inside

It knows my name

And I’m terrified

To be the one to take the step

I don’t think I’m ready yet

But I’m pulled like a thread

Through the needle eye

I gave it up

And I don’t know why

Photo by Patrick Carr on Unsplash

Passing Through

We’re only passing through

We’re a whisper on a page

We are the bodies that we grow

And then again to age

We’re the midnight in the summer

When the moon is shining high

We’re the truth between the lines

On the paper where we lie

We’re the justice and the mercy

The all bequeathing love

We’re the hand that writes the heavens

In stars far above

We’re the darkness and the light

The fire we ignite

But among the chaos

I know we will be alright

Photo by Greg Rakozy on Unsplash

Dancing

Dancing to a rhythm

That no one can see

There is music playing

But is it just me

Who can hear the call

Of the Divine

And endless reservoir

Of fine

And a diamond mine

In the grass

All you ever have to do

Is ask

The Ogre

The ogre

Eats me up again

He knocks on my door

And sends me into a spin

Like a washing machine

Or the depths of a dream

I roll

In endless currents of my soul

And dive deeper into the ocean again

I was free once, and I will be when

And I remember now

Under all the fray

That I am endlessly

Okay

And fine

I hopscotch to

This rhythm of mine

This Winter

The feeling of panic

Knarls in my stomach

Maybe this is too much to be

Maybe there’s so much yet to see

But the aching roars

And the spirit soars

To become an avalanche

Of my own making

And I count every one

Of the breaths I’m taking

In case I misplace one

Amidst the snow

The winter has gone on

For so long, you know

NF Party

The NF party

We can all join in

And it’s not limited

To us and them

It is what

We’ve always been

It may just be

That we haven’t seen

And if life

Is just a dream

Then who is the one

In the stream

To feel the water

Rush by

And I

Don’t have to try

I just live

And I breathe

Giving love

Just what it needs

The Winter

The winter, it weathers

The brush and the grass

And I wonder about

That which will ever last

And you could call it God

You could call it Christ

It transcends death

It is Eternal Life

It goes beyond time

It goes beyond space

It is the Peace

That will never cease

It is the Love

To always abide

It is the Freedom

You don’t have to hide

Don’t have to cover

With shields and holds

It is the Wisdom

Inside our souls

It is the breath

It is the breathing

It is with me

And it isn’t leaving

Photo by Katarzyna Kos on Unsplash

Everywhere

The love, it abides

The music, it sings

Into worlds

Of everythings

To pierce

Your darkest night

Don’t you know

It’ll be alright

Because every hair

On your head is counted

And the emptiness

Is a hidden mountain

Of stability

That just remains

Regardless of

Time and pain

Regardless of

Lost ways

It’s all around

That’s what it says

Photo by Anton Darius on Unsplash

Vibrantly Alive

Peace is alive

It’s vibrating sound

It’s in the room

And it’s all around

It is the space

Within the form

It is the heat

That keeps us warm

That keeps us safe

Held in its hands

The permanent

Among the sands

Of time

That just change and wave

It is the Lord

And He will save

All of us

Come what may

There’s nothing that

You have to say

Photo by sunnie on Unsplash

The Calling

The Lord, He calls me

Into who I’m meant to be

Onto the road I’m meant to walk

I don’t want this to be all talk

But the evidence of Truth

To be alive, to be the proof

Of the goodness that knows no bounds

The silence within all the sounds

The love that is all abiding

It’s time to come out of hiding

Photo by Benita Anand on Unsplash

Grace

The Lord knows how to walk my shoes

And I know how to pay my dues

As he directs my glance

There’s no need for a second chance

As he makes my spirit dance

And a new way

To make headway against the tide

A way to live my life alive

A way to communicate to all Beings

The power of our shared seeings

The power of Grace to renew

And it is living in you

Awakening

The light it struck me in the dark

And I had to give up playing the part

Of the hard done by fool

It happened one day in school

Where the Divine called my name

Pulled me away from all blame

Unto a new dawn

And all the pain was gone

All the suffering that could ever be

Is just an illusion that you seem to see

But we are free as a bird

From the story we never heard

The Love of Letting Go

If you love something, you let it go

That’s what I’m doing here, you know

As I let go of my grip on the infinite

I think I just might be alright

And concede to life that death is king

He will take everything

Every stone and every blade of grass

And doesn’t ever think to ask

But there’s something even time can’t steal

It’s in the domain of the real

It’s pure and it’s refined

And far beyond the old mind

That would tell you this is that

And have you running like an alley cat

Up walls and over bins

Years lost in the din

Yet something finds me in the Now

I don’t know quite how

But it pulls me up by my boots

And still I grow deeper roots

To fulfill my nourishment

I need no encouragement

To be the light that I am

I move in waves without a plan

Image Credit: eberhard grossgasteiger at Unsplash.com

The Mystery of Being

The mystery of being

I can never know

Who it is that I am

And where I should go

So I walk on the stones

Laid in the water

To get across

Coz the other side caught her

And it’s got that feel

That loves to move

And there’s nothing there

That I can improve

And I can be certain

In the Great Unknown

I love the shore

And it’s where I am goin’

Riverbeds and Ancient Eyes

Where riverbeds

Meet ancient eyes

And I wheel away

My disguise

The one that keeps me

Safe and warm

But it is useless

In a storm

As the wind batters the coast

I’m in a cabin making toast

And the fire it roars

As my spirit soars

To hear the rain

Against the window pane

Knocking like some inane

Visitor from the plain

And will you

Ever visit this place again

It’s been so long

And I don’t know when

I’ll ever get to say your name

Coz, love, it isn’t the same

Silhouettes in the Starlight

Were we just

Silhouettes in the starlight

As you console me

It’ll all be alright

But I know

You can’t reason away things like this

And if forever was only

Our first kiss

Then what is lying

Far down the road

All I can say

Is that it’s all that I knowed

The Bright Lights

The lights shone from the sky

Bright and in awe and I don’t know why

As the days rolled into weeks

And the weeks into years

And I get by on just hiding my tears

And the best part of me

Doesn’t say a thing

She is just ancient 

And a bird on the wing

And if she could

Then she would sing

I loved and so 

I gave up everything 

Image Credit: Elen Laureano

It’s Fearless

The sound of Taylor
Brewing up a storm
The heat could keep
The whole world warm
As she sings
To her own refrain
Growing up 
And out of the pain
Into something
Afresh and anew
I guess that I
Believe in you

Having To Let You Go

It's not that easy
All this having to let you go 
I didn't think
I'd have to do it, you know
I thought we could
Go on forever
But now every endeavour
Speaks of you 
As you go on with your life
And ardent devotion over strife
Seems to capture my days
And there are so many ways
To miss what we had 
And to regret 
What turned out bad
Could you forgive
If I live and let live
And consent 
To being the presence 
Where heaven went 

Indefinability

Is it worth all the time
All this losing weight 
All the giving in
And shedding hate
Because time has come
For our true Self
To be revealed 
As nothing else
Than that we've 
Been searching for
Knock and the door
Opens from the inside out
I'm not the words
That come from my mouth

The Sound of Thirty

Listening to Snow Patrol
Rock the beat
And Gary Lightbody
Fast on his feet
To an uproaring tumult
Is this what it means to be adult
Still listening to music in my room
Then doing yoga via zoom
Or on youtube 
Finding new seas
That I traverse 
Like never be's

Translation

I write about no one
And nothing agrees
I am split level
I've got my degrees
And if you ask a question
Who is to answer 
Love is the way
And life is the dancer
To a new song
To a new word
And it's like the best
Sound you've ever heard
But this poem's just a tribute
It's not the real thing 
You know it when
You give up on this fling
That you've been caught in
That you've been living
And God is peaceful 
He is forgiving
So don't walk away
From all you own
Just listen to your heart 
As true colours are shown
As light and love
Break through and bask 
All you ever have to do
Is ask 

Futurescape

Someday I'll be a wife
But I woke up in the night
To discover it isn't to be
And there's this emptiness surrounding me
And it moves
And it breathes
And it gives me 
What I need
As I ache 
And pilfer dreams
They're not really
True it seems 

Image Credit: Samuel Ferrara on Unsplash.com 

Roots

The weight of worldly wisdom
Lies on me
And there is something 
I used to be
But the far distant shore
Has pulled me in like a tide
Now I'm three quarters half alive
Learning to breathe in from my roots
As this plant grows shoots
Up into the open air
I could've sworn that he was there

Image Credit: Johann Siemens on Unsplash.com 

Daybreak

It was like a new dawn
The day the sun broke
And I'd come apart 
Inside my own hope
Building a home
Out of tinder and wood
I'd run with the wind 
But I'm not sure I could 
Be anything but still
In the glen, in the field
I gave up the game 
I gave in to yield
And something in the forest
Then was revealed
It was like smoky chimneys 
Now the flavour is sealed
As I wander pathways
That lead through the trees
And life is more 
Than what is believed
Than what is restored
To ardent love
A devotion to Truth
That shines from above

Dream Talk

It's all I can do not to blame him
And Lord, you know, I cannot tame him
With my heart all made of fire
And his way of raising it higher
With the wind as it blows in
And did we ever begin
Trying to get closer
Then further away
You know I couldn't say
All that I meant to you on the phone
You're in the room and I am alone
But bring me some water and flowers to dry
I said okay with a tear in my eye
And you, everlasting you
Just smile
As you hold my hand
We were meant to be
It wasn't planned
And I laugh
At your inanity
Remember that time
You just ran at me
Down silky, silver snowy days
And I've been with you in so many ways
But still aloft 
I held your eyes at no cost
Though my own benefit
Be unharmed
I wouldn't settle for any charms
But love
In twinkly starlit nights
And you beside me and alright
Oh love, what are we meant to do
We're in a dream and I choose you
Only to wake 
With sheets in my hand
There's none of this that I had planned

Later, dude!

I don't want to monetize you
In case you lose your value
You're riverbeds and open skies
And i would never want to dull you
Down into the grey refinity of age
Where words upon words just write the page
Into existence, then out again
I could write about life, then love, then men
But you, oh imperturbable you
I could never capture you within the walls of this cage
And you make the beast inside of me rage
Against the machine that is holding it down
You're an ocean and in it I drown
Only to discover my mermaid nature
If not now, can I save you for later? 

Empty Air

The day it all dropped down by my side
Is the day I truly came alive
And there was nothing there
Just empty air
Nothing with the will to get by 
And I just basked in the vastness of the sky
I wasn't big and I sure wasn't small
Only aware of it all
And perceiving 
Something that was
Beyond believing 
And beyond reason in its perfect hue
There's nothing there I have to do 
Only make waves to lap the shore
And give in to worship all I adore
And once again, once more
I let go to open the door

The Weather

The weather moves in its own way
And, Lord knows, it wasn't meant to stay
But be free flowing and in motion
Like some kind of locomotion
And all I can do is just agree
Consent to It using me
To achieve its own aim
This life is free 
But it's not a game
Not cheap to buy 
Or sell the ticket
Neither calm 
Nor there to trick it
But only abiding in one way
I love you and that's what it says

Seasons

There is thunder in my footsteps
And rhythm in my feet
I’m like the shore lapping 
Where the waters meet

And every day’s a sigh
And every week I utter
The same old words
Against the window shutter 

And the house it creaks and groans
With every passing wind
The pain in my bones
A sign that I have sinned

And winter knows my name
It comes howling in
Only to give way
To let spring begin

And summer has its sound
And autumn its flavour
And every moment’s like a taste
That I give in to savour

As every month rolls round
To make another year
As I let go of all the lies
And am freed from the fear

Ramblings

All of the Boys

I love you far and deeply 
And the wall curves so steeply 
It can't keep me out from you
Because I know what you want to do
As you walk me to the door
And I couldn't want you more
With my hand on the locket you gave me 
I didn't ask but would you save me
All the trouble and all the time 
Be the best one of mine
Because I have written a time or two 
But none of them is anything to you 
As you smile and you laugh
And you just hang out in my gaff
With my little sister playing games 
You were one of my five names 
And I didn't know there was a choice
But I gave my love a voice 
As it sang to it's own refrain
Can we promise not to cause each other pain
But we know that there are hearts in this 
And it wasn't fake, our first kiss
Out there on the track
I thought there was a way back 
But in all I hid from you 
You were there, and I saw it too 

Romantic

I've always been a romantic 
And so dramatic, it's true
But I could never 
Have dreamt up you 
Coz you're so distinguished 
So refined
And you kinda stole
All of my time
With your genuine
And your reflect
I didn't see you coming
Couldn't predict next 
But only hold 
Onto your sleeve
You know you made
Me believe
And I'm a cynic
And jaded too
But it falls apart
Around you
Like the walls I built 
To hide myself 
You get right in 
Like no one else
Like no one can 
Like no one does 
I'm defenceless
And I call it love
Coz there's no sign 
Of separation 
I stared you out 
At the train station
And you ran 
You ran way 
But there's so much
Still left to say
And if you would 
Just hear me out
You'd know what it is
I'm about 
But all this empty 
Space won't do
I've got to find me 
In front of you
And if you could 
Would you erase the years
I never meant to cost you
Any tears 
Never meant to cause you
Any strain 
But with things like this 
There's often pain
And I would smile
And hold your hand
Tell you that 
I'll all be grand 
I'd tell you that
My love is true 
And I wish the world
Of the best for you