Do I really want you to come a little closer You’re just like a ghost With the flavors of nothing And what I love the most I see you shy away and I avoid Being one of the girls You’re not one of the boys But you dance Like Heaven has given you another chance To be all you are The wonderful bridge Constellatory star That just shines Like gleaming diamonds in gold mines I pick one up But it just reflects the look of you, love And we’re one again Outside the realm of women and men Just to be what is He holds my hand and I am his To recalculate All that has me in a lowly state Where do I walk And is all my effulgence just mere talk Do I live up to The brigand that I saw in you As you caught my hand I catch my breath as you reprimand Me for my trauma of being too much I back away but I also clutch You to me Can you love the whole sea When it’s not yours or mine I felt crushed watching About Time And I could feel a lion roar Deep within me Death the moment life begins me As I sit up off the floor What was that and what’s more Who am I How am I not to die When this body walks I seem to move But it’s just patterning on the groove Of the effervescent I hate to be described as pleasant Coz it’s so lukewarm And I am nothing if not a storm Brewing over the hill Do you know the moment if you’re not still?
We became like two dogs snarling In the days I called you darling And you spit your words out at me I let you go free Like we’re aching from our history You and the mystery As ages pass us by And we love but we don’t know why And we fight and we try But we can’t forgive the lie And you smile but it’s faint and half hearted And I just remember when we started And how it is so different now I still see you through the wind somehow
What if we’re living in Paradise The green fields of our life And he is tormented by the loss of Eden And I was ardent in my believing Til I met the moment in a night And something did ignite Burned like a fuse towards dynamite Spinning ever closer to its own execution I could tell the truth but it’d be a dilution Of what I mean to say I’d rather just point the way And have you follow where I go But my steps shake as I move slow Across the ground of the room There is so much more than doom In the space that we share There is true love and care I feel I must speak up to say It’s more than a myth and okay I get that you have your own perspective But my view is true and objective Like a glass with no lens You only see through it when you don’t defend Yourself from what you mean to be You just open up for free And find it echo in your bones Away from the beat of earphones And all the noise that fills the day It’s not a game or a power play But something that must be known I pull the curtains back and it’s shown
Idealism has me loving him Through the wings of a new song And I’ve only felt Sparsely that I belong In and out between the fear Catching hold of what I hold dear In the hopes that it won’t leave And it’s little that I don’t believe Coz it all pulses in my throat And are we post rote Learning now I sit upon the bough Of a leaning tree To watch the sunset fade in front of me And think it’s much like a life That doesn’t get to happen twice Unless you’re into that sort of thing A reincarnation into the skin that swim In the great ocean And I’ve always been emotion Trying to calm down But I walk on solid ground As my heart beats in my chest Trust in God and leave the rest
I just wanted to know if you left me a message It’s nothing insincere But I’ve been tripping the wire Of in love with you, dear And I know it’s a fallacy And I know there’s nothing wrong It’s just you gave me that rush Like you thought I was strong And I’m smiling to myself As I’m sitting on the couch Threw normal out the window Of sanity to vouch For me in the days When the water is less clear I had a dream of you When your words made you seem near But anyway and anyhow I’ve got to let it go I just wanted to uncover These reams and reams of snow So you’d know that in the winter The sun burns just as true You said that you liked me Well, hey man, back at you!
I know it’s unfair to exclaim That you save me from all the pain That I brought to bear on myself Now I’m searching for the answer in someone else And you never had anything to do With what I faced without you Coz I made that choice all on my own And I’ve never felt alone Coz I’ve always had support And a steady kind of rapport With everyone I seem to meet I’m fire so the heat Is to be expected Don’t take my manners for being disrespected I’m only playing a xylophone on you And I want you to sing along to The refrain we effortlessly make I do it for the both of our sake
The non spectacular nature of Now Is something that makes me weak somehow As I stare at the trees They remind me to get up off my knees And stand in the shine that is the sun Like God is calling and I am the one Who must walk the path of being still And many things change, this never will As the ochre of sunsets burn in your eyes And there is a love that never dies I found it on the green of the room Across from the front hall and I attune To the sound of Heaven’s bells As they call out to me amid ne’er do wells And I’m walking down paces on the avenues I’m all red as they play the blues In summertime or winter cold I’m frozen at the age of not getting old
Everyone is in various states of disarray They check at the till to see what they’ve to pay And they click on their phone so they’ll be liked I’ll always be worried that I’ll ignite Coz I’m so clearly made of flame One day they’ll all know my name And not for the wrong reasons The time is changing, passing seasons The leaves fall off the trees You discard what they believe Coz it doesn’t fit the shoe You’ve come to walk as you
I feel myself sinking down into the midnight The absence of perfume, the absence of light The dawn of knowing what you cannot say The reluctant acceptance of what cannot stay And I know in the storm there is a break of day And when you trust in God it’ll all be okay But sometimes the ocean is just too deep And I try to catch a few moments of sleep Before I awaken with a start Like everything good it comes from the heart
You’re burning up the atmosphere Like the ozone layer is clear And fuck that bullshit, I spin the dial And listen to you sincere Coz the guy beside me loves me And I love him too But the worst of the weather Means it is not you And closing my eyes is all I can do So that I won’t know The places where I should not go Though they call to me An elephant graveyard or Eternity Could you please give me a clue You laugh and say the answer too!
Leaving a paper trail of tears behind me I’m overwrought so never mind me As I build a new monument to all that’s fallen I’m in the Deep South and they are drawling As they curb all anticipation Can I watch your tv station Just for a little while I made you see, you made me smile And all I can think of is torment The indigenous people and where they went Forced across rock and stone Broken in their skin and bone But with their Spirit true I can still have faith in You As all comes crashing like a wave Is it sin to abdicate to save And hold a hand Is the shore more than sand And if a rock is hewn to bits Do you have space to sit with it Or does its impermanent tone Remind you what it’s like to be alone Moving weight like old stone I’d hold back but I’ve already shown All of my stars to you I’ll love you if you want me to
Ijust wanna protect her And I’m so mad that he’d reject her And ruin her starlit shine It’s kind of like the light that used to be mine And now she sings of a defeat, years ago I close my eyes because I should not know But I do I still feel you In the cobwebs of my mind Kind of like a secret I’ve left behind And we tangled up our avenues I sing of heaven without you And innocence lost She paid the price but at what cost
There’s an angel on the cross He’s been resurrected and all is not lost As he comes for me To lift me with his wings so free Up and out of this situation Away from town and my education Into a new sphere, a new realm One where God is at the helm Of the ship we all steer What’s left to say when the Holy Ghost is near
Nothing fits it’s shape any more When you’re knocking on a closed door Only to see it opens from the inside All this time you’ve been alive And never really known it Like your true colours, never really shown it Til the dye is running through I got messed up in a dream of you One without an adequate ending And I quit the scene instead of unfriending You where you stood out there Didn’t want you to think I didn’t care But I’ve got to run Coz I love the sun And how it turns my skin brown I never lived for the town But for the acres, fields of grass Lying in the Everlast Til the cows come home I realise I’m not alone
That fast feeling of fading when you’re twenty two And everything is growing up around you The flowers to rise, then wither and die The sheets of sleet that just make you cry As you’re facing outward into the rain Must we go through this all over again As the avenues merge into one route And you take a shot at the kissing booth But it’s all just so fleeting in transition Like you’ve woken up out of a worn condition And into the sky that always serene To anchor in what you’ve always been
Afraid of my own words It’s like a tree being afraid of the birds Never mind, it’s true I can’t hide any of this from you As I take pencil to page To rattle the walls of every cage To let the dark out The demons can’t hurt you if you shout And call the sky into being It is the waves that I am freeing To know their ocean nature Like the moon so in tune with every crater I smile at the good of it all Cause I found solid ground in the freefall
Losing the love of my life I always wanted to be his wife And I’m unscripted, I’m undue And I’m running from anything but you Coz you’ve got lashes, you’ve got hair You’ve got Presence amid the being there And I smile and I laugh And you catch another raft As it shoots out into the world You’ve got a life, you’ve got a girl And I would never want to interfere It’s just I love you always, dear In the moments come unbidden Amid all that remains hidden In butterflies and in cymbal clash The rain comes to pour on me and lash Out down from the heavens I’m kicking stones hooked up to sevens As a day each week that passes Could be enough to outclass us And I know you’ve got your sonnet ring It’s just you don’t know everything Not half as much as you profess to contain Must I hear you again explain All I am in neat little quotes Must I be student to take notes And hear once more what you say It’s all in the going away But what if I choose to remain A dash of paint to upskill the rain As it colours the window grey But we live in Ireland so come what may In brutal asides and centerfolds The path we walk is made of gold And must we unknow the way To mean what the people say In amounts that fall due And I’m so taken with the fire of you As you tip your hat to another trope And I’m just driving by the coast With the sound of sea in my ears I brush away the errant tears That make lanes from my eyes To mirror that of rainy skies In all that I profess is true It’s pure in love and it’s with you
He’s got my number And I’ve got his address And we both have something To confess As we laugh and we smile And walk down the road The rain is pummeling But it hasn’t showed As his beauty consume And I’m seeing stars Do you think this is what it means To be chasing cars Coz he’s steady as a rock And we’ll never be what we’re not In the notes he takes I see the page and I hit the brakes Coz I can’t take this ride with you You saw inside and I don’t mean to Be flakey but I’ve got to run Because I still love someone
I’ve got narrow arms I’ve always been thin And I’m so short Beside him But he makes me feel Ten stories high And I’ll love him Til the day I die Or longer and further If I may But I want him To know, okay Letting go Of the years I hid Always holding out For the highest bid But something in The way he smiled Had me walking All these miles Back to the place I started The moment when Faith imparted Us with just A moment to spare And I can tell When you’re not there And when you are Like a cosmic star Does she realise Just how far This love will go It’s forever I hope you know It threads the needle So very fine And is a step Out of time Into what You can only call The root Of it all Grown in ground Like steady soil So, let go Of all your toil And rest back into The arms of Heaven As secure as The number eleven
Careful anonymity is the name of the game As I breathe through it like it’s all the same And I protect what I see But it draws upon eternity To here and there and let the surge As I feel the moment when I merge With all that is or could be You look at me, do you see I’m free And yet held back by errant chains That fall from the sky like rains Everywhere to conspire Lift up what must take you higher Then soar into your own soul Deeper than the waves that roll Back where it is completely still Beyond the realm of hate and will But thundered prose knows the beat And it walks itself with my two feet To suddenly surprise the day I’m fine, you know, is that okay?
I just remember his eyes I don’t know whether they’re green or blue Except for that picture of you That I saw on a screen miles away Now you’re where I was that day Somewhere in a big, big city But lonely and that’s a pity Coz we could be something, don’t you agree But you only talk to a picture of me And I ain’t making war Coz, God knows, what for And I don’t hate what you had to do That you have someone walking with you And it’ll never be what we were But maybe it’s better and you stir To match the moment of her And she looks like she catches your glance I bet she never asks you to dance Coz you move like you’re in a trance And I would take another chance Out on the wind Is it to have sinned To want what isn’t yours to crave A desire I try hard to save From getting to the heart of me And we’re apart but you see I’ve got you buttoned on my shirt It was never meant to hurt But I can hear it in your voice Do we have another choice?
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The full force of the machine hit me across the skull And I’ve skin as thin as cotton wool As I try to find the deep reverb To silence noise with a word
Looking into the eyes Of innocent men Could you spell that For me again It reframes My female pain As not something I’d wanna go through again And I know it’s justified It’s just that I might’ve lied When I said it’s all your fault And I locked you in a vault But then I see once more The light of consciousness I adore Shining forth from the heart of you And it’s all that I can do To open heart and surrender Forget something I tried to remember For so long and with so much strive I’m just glad you’re alive And we can call this mission one My God, you shine just like the sun
You set fire to my soul In the thunder as the waves roll And I cannot forgive The way things as it is But something keeps a hold of my dress The hem of it and I confess That my marauding spirit has grown tired As though the universe has conspired To leave me at the door of you And I will prove it to be true That my heart beats a flame And I don’t have to be tame Or sit within the confines of What I’ve been told to think of love That you could star in my sky I let it go and I don’t know why
I need to write in Morse code Coz to tell our story would be an ode And we’ve got leaves of times gone by And you always promised me sky high As I take your hand and we lift and soar Into a future I can’t see anymore Coz you’re ancient, you’re beautiful, you are all the trees And an Angel of Mercy picked me up off my knees So I could stand as the wind goes round It spirals but I’m solid ground And I dunno about ages, I dunno about time But somewhere you will always be mine In a storybook or on a page I seem to write like a sage In professions of what’s true The slipping sands of me and you Coz we are born to fade away A moment of sun before the day Closes into night like a cyclical thing And every bird knows how to sing The silence like it’s true and real I thought you should know how I feel So I put it in a letter, left it at your door But I won’t bother you anymore And you know where I am if you feel to reply I’m always in the same space to fly On the beauty that I own Love’s everywhere, I’m not alone
There was that time I tried to drink you out But my foundations were not shaken And I couldn’t even doubt That you were the one for me Now I don’t know how you are But I feel you cosmically A white hot burning star Somewhere in the avenues Or in the everglades I don’t mean to be funny But where’d you get your shades Coz you’re looking mighty fine With your cool as hell stare And I can’t apologize For what just wasn’t there Only promise you that I Love with the full of my soul And when the waves cascade It’s then I hear them roll Calling out your name Like an old riverbend Was I wrong or right For ever having clicked send And I just can’t bring myself To take back the day When the moment faced my soul And I said okay Give in to all the longing All the heated prose If you’re looking for some words Do you know just who you chose Someone who could compose Sonnets of your name And if you’re wondering if I’ve changed Well I’m still the same Still am party to A little bit of wine And everytime I’m asked I’ll say that I am fine Coz I don’t want to torch This wooden fence I’ve grown From the rubble of the woods That once were seeds I’d sown Now they’re all a garden gate And the forest that you see Is uncharted and unknown A pure mystery So please do not go rambling If you do not mean to stay I’m made for forever I’m just built that way And can never give in To the stride of the day Don’t worry ‘bout the love It’s just the modern way And I’m ancient and I’m grieving And I’m all over the place But I am strong and I’m willful You don’t have to second guess my face In the brooks and in the rivers That are running wild And there are some parts of me That are still a child Innocent and foolhardy And so like a stone Except for quiet company I live my life alone Far away from the auspices Of who you’d think to ask When I take a sip I drink it from a flask And keep up with all the weather As it’s changing every hour I’m always sitting waiting For that one thousand petalled flower In the deep of time and weight Slowly to succumb I look at all the rocks Amid the diamonds I’ve become And wonder what a season Would take in these parts I never knew it till I answered With the full of my heart
I blame the doctors for their prejudicial minds And it’s my own pride I seem to find As I stigmatize the fear of being unwell With all the secrets I do not tell As the brave stand up to say There are days I’m not okay And I find that I admire The way he stokes my roaring fire With his honesty and his sincere And I’m always gonna hold him dear Like a soul brother out there somewhere But touch the cracks I do not dare Coz they are all sealed with gold And stories that have never been told As I see the sunrise It’s like the dawn of morning in your eyes As you open a new day I love you babe, I hope that’s okay
Loving you is like waiting on the last train It’s like standing out in the pouring rain I’m jealous of the drops of water that fall on your head I’m jealous of the blankets that cover you in bed And I’m always so well defined And you’re always away but I don’t mind And though the paper is written in ink Of all of the things I shouldn’t think But just sway to the breeze And you stay only to leave But I don’t mind welcoming you back It’s not like you take something I lack And everything is in boxes that they stack And if you look I’ll pick up the slack And rush to the shore As you say you don’t want me anymore And I just remember the festival And the way I let it go to hell Fighting to be my own dear self I can’t share this with anyone else And then I met you, you just turned to me It’s like the waters parted and I could see Like you held eternity In a single glance, what are we? And you smiled, just so, down into my eyes It’s like you saw right through the disguise And now it’s like I walk on one foot And you said no like the sharpest cut As I hold out strong in the weather And I’m just dreaming of you in the heather And how far you are away The bridge is broken so we cannot stay Like Sora and Kairi or the Marching Bands The waves come to kiss the lands But keep us at the distance we know I hope you are well and that your clock runs slow So that you have many years in reserve And it’s always the greatest that you serve While I watch and just observe The moment you see that I’ve got nerve!
I love whiskey In a Baileys glass Do you like to drink? Do you have to ask? Because it makes me feel More like myself Every now and then It’s good for my mental health And I don’t get locked But I do like to dance Around in my pj’s Like a second chance Like there’s nobody watching Coz nobody is Unless you count the Lord But I’m already his And I smile at the sunshine In the dark of night Coz there’s something within me That’s a lot like the light They describe in tomes And I shake it off The rhythm of the alones That sometimes subsides But other times I believe That heart is just something I keep on my sleeve And if nothing is everything Why do you grieve I walk the path But where does it lead Coz the road has been trodden By many a soul But can you still love When the story’s been told?
No one could deny The spark in Stephen’s eyes As he talks to me he folds Time into days of old And he laughs, suddenly and unexpected I hope he didn’t feel rejected When I bowed out, when I skipped town He has to know I love him around And I just couldn’t fine the words to say When I was in that place I had to stay That his effervescence shone like stars And you could trawl the neatest bars Looking for a smile like that I have to say I took off my hat To your ardently and devoted I open hearted and emoted And you didn’t faze or fade away You just let me know what it is to stay In the light of your heavenly sun And you may not be the one But you’re the one who shared some time with me I wrote this down so you might see
I hate the pain Isn’t that what they say But I couldn’t have had it Any other way And you kick your shoes Up in the dirt I never knew love Could make you hurt But I hold you fast And pray that this moment last But it was never enough To quench my thirst I’m a fire burning embers As we argue across the genders That seem to have accumulated between us I dunno, do you think God dreamed us Up into a sort of creation It’s more than winter by the station It is summer kissing booths Reliving the passion of our youth But I’m all but done with photo albums I feel the pound of beating drums Calling me back to your door And I fainted on the floor Yes, right out of my standing To the dreams that they are handing Out like they’re truth And you just take aim and shoot Your bullet at my heart Your aim is good, I feel the dart Strike me sharp and true Am I marked with the brand of you Or am I forever effervescent Meeting you in essence I let the fire go But I still burn with it, you know
I’ve no interest in travel But I’d move Heaven and Earth for you I’d span the oceans near and wide Just so we could be close to The great divide that keeps us apart The diamond in your soul And you may have grown, but I woulda known If your waves suddenly started to roll If the tide had started to beat A steady rap on my door I gaze into distances far and away Always hoping for a little bit more And you were young and beautiful Now you’re craggy and grey You used to love me Now you drag me each day As I try to build fortresses To what was There’s an army storming gates At the lakes of because And who are you when you look in the mirror Do you dine with a shirt and tie And could you state or equivocate What’s become just a really big lie And dawn comes each morning To shelter the night In the ages we part just to ignite The paper I’ve been setting up How could you look at me and not call it love
Trusting in the Christ Was the best decision of my life And I’m no girl to be a wife Just one to bring the light And I’ve always trusted in you From the living room to the pew Singing songs in tribute to The glory and the faith I have in you And darkness eventually came to call I’m young and lying against a wall Crying tears in a free for all But you brought the love to stop the fall And lift me up, now I’m on my feet And I know there’s nothing I could meet That would bring me defeat Now that your mercy speak For me amongst the chasm so bleak How am I standing if I’m weak And there’s nothing left to seek Now that I’ve found that holy heat That burns in the heart of me A consciousness that’s been set free As I proclaim eternity In every blade of grass that I see Called upon to be the voice To speak silence in the noise And draw all souls into you Just tell me what to do
There were days with Darragh When my point of view was decidedly narrow He saw me like a girl, I saw him like a friend It has been years though and it doesn’t end As I still reflect on his heartbeat When we danced with both our feet And shine with all our might I can’t ignore your candlelight And your fire that just burn It’s more than degrees we earn As we spend time into each other’s company And I’m always thinking, what does he want of me But he just smiles and looks in my eyes I let go camouflage I keep to disguise The darkness in the heart of my soul But he just surfs the waves that I roll And then laughs when he sees my car Buys me a drink at the bar And makes me smile, makes me laugh And he does it all without me needing to ask And I wonder does his fire sign match mine As we dance to the rhythm of the rhyme And he’s red as a burning flame I’m surprised he even remembers my name But his is etched upon my skin I loved him so I let him in Let him see the hesitate And he just pulls me out of that state And never ever makes me wait But breaks apart into something new I don’t know if you know who you are, do you?
Does eternity gaze at you When you’re staring at the stars And do you think you could see their lights Through your prison bars Coz we’re all in the gutter But some of us are looking up Is it just a mirage To say that I’m in love Coz the guy don’t even know me Or so it would seem And he’s looking for a girlfriend Not for a sky high queen And I can’t figure out what it may mean My friend says it’s an expression of what I dare to dream And he’s taken by another so I’ve got to let it go I say I’m not cold, though I’m standing in the snow And he was like a stranger that day on the phone I’d never felt so embarrassed or left all alone As I told him that I loved him, that I held him dear And he made the situation all too crystal clear And I’m just clutching at straws Because the ice never thaws I’m just frosting up the glass And he was just lounging on the grass As I waited and I wondered And slightly ran away Out of fear of what I felt And of what I might say Because it’s too good to be true This couldn’t be real That I get all I want And spare cards to deal And it’s so obvious He’s what I’m looking for As I stand outside Just staring at his door And there’s light and there’s warmth But it’s all inside I’m shivering and I’m shaking From the window where I hide Do I finally let this go Or knock and be seen I wouldn’t mind the weather Coz it is just a dream And there are passers by Telling me, go home I didn’t dare to mention That it’s inside an iPhone And I dig my hands down deeper Into the pockets of my coat I’m taking this too far And what is worse I know it So I take one last look As I head for the trees To live a life of freedom Instead of living on my knees But as I go I hear a shout That he can’t do without I turn and I glare And he’s just standing there In a dressing gown and slippers Looking oh so calm But I can’t run back To another false alarm And anyway he’s got company And I won’t lead astray Go back to what you made It’ll be the break of day And we’re miles apart In the feet that we span And I’ll always love you Though I don’t know if you can Love me just to leave me So let me go this time I would if I could, he says But you’d still be mine And I glower and I pout Though it does me no good He frowns in return As I turn back for the wood Because I can’t do this Anymore, my love I don’t have a reason So look to God above And you’ll find your answers It’s everything they say Maybe I am strong To leave this and away But he pulls me with force The mere magnet strength And I look for my courage Coz I don’t know where it went As I’m grappling with stones Trying to get a hold And all of this flipping the switch Is getting old And anyway, who is she And how can I say That I can’t find adequate Means to stay away And she’s silent and staring Just looking at me Trying to fight With his gravity In the den of the house That used to be mine But he threw me out When I took the time To really study And explore The nature of A solid floor So I relent, give in And feel myself swayed It’s not for loneliness That this is okayed And they both turn around Leave the door open A little glance back But I amn’t coping And freezing I rise Up to my feet As I step on the mat It’s neighbors they greet And I see the old furniture I used to know Step into the light And let the pain go Give up on the solitary Lone expanse Though it’s been years Since we thought to dance And I see there’s a room At the end of the hall With a door open He says it’s yours and all And I finally know Come to realise That they’re living in what I built for their lives And all this time We’re waiting to see The masterpiece Foretold by me In the din, in the quiet In the subside I lay down to rest And close my eyes To finally know A slumber that’s real He didn’t leave me He just let me feel All of his peace So that I could deal With the moment as It’s resting long And my God I belong! And she doesn’t hate me Coz it is cool I think I may have Dreamt this in school So I rub my eyes Shake myself out Get rid of the fear Lose all the doubt Find the heart That heats my soul All is Love That’s the story I’m told
Craving that sugar rush And you were my favorite crush And you smile and I see stars Running and I’m chasing cars Down the street like a dog and its tail You know that you’re bound to fail When you set yourself up like that And I know I want you back But you use a poké attack And I’m left standing on my own After I left my colours shown Wondering why with so little a endeavor At civility, I could never Understand just why and when And I’m always hoping to see you again But I just don’t get men Coz you shout then you wish I was there I ask for your love and you say you don’t care And you’re harsh and unpleasant and drive me away Did you mean to sabotage my stay? Or were you just anticipating the leave I watch you silent and I believe That there’s more to you But I just don’t know what to do As I let your hand go to your side And I’m okay but I think you have cried Will you remember this for me I loved you so I set you free
Am I just gonna have to let you go Coz there doesn’t seem to be any way to know That you are here and you are there And you know I’ll always care As the forest closes in on the memory of us And I dunno where to place my trust As the ages all fold one into the other You’re my soulmate, yeah you’re my brother And I really hope that you’re well But there doesn’t seem to be any way to tell Except just to live in the light And pray to God that you’re alright
The feeling of panic when I’m talking to people I’m much more at home under a steeple Praying to God for all that could be But I’m so far from normal and I think they can see And is it just ego to say I’m afraid That I spend the whole day in the shade Just to avoid what I’m speaking of I refract diamonds and call it love And do I just make small what’s colossal inside Run away from eyes and hide Until someone finds me behind the curtain I’m sorry for weakness and all the hurting I’m sorry for being unusually proud Defiant and brave as I say it out loud That it’s okay and I see you too I want everyone to know it so that they see through The veneer of strong that I put off We are one people and all is not lost And everyone’s got something that they keep secret But I’m gonna tell it instead of keep it Like a story that’s been too long in the dark A tree whose leaves are as bright as its bark Even in the winter snow I love a lot so I let it all go
I feel like I’m out of the loop Now that I’m no longer sitting on the stoop Like a lonesome bird And what are the words that you think you have heard Coz it all spiraled out of my control When I tried to capture your soul And you rebelled with a defiant stance How dare I ask you to dance But there was just this music, you mustn’t hear it It’s beautiful and it crystal clears it As the vision is foggy in the car I still have no sense of what you are Coz you defy definition in your design And you are good looking, if you don’t mind And I just want to write a tome to your earth The reality that could never hurt As you assuage And I get really mad But it’s no good You still leave like I thought you would But what I don’t understand Is how any of this could’ve been preplanned Or destiny I watch you like you’re there for me Though you move to the side I stay on my own and abide
She writes music that catches in your soul As if all the waves have to do is roll And midnight comes before each dawn So don’t lament what’s gone Because it will come around again anew You can’t miss what is destined for you And I hope that’s true coz he’s all I see What if he was never meant for me I wonder and I pause and I flip through the prose What if he is the one that fate chose To hold my hand and be the One I see him like he’s the Son Of God in garden grass And I wonder if all I had to do was ask Would you maybe wanna be my guy I know I’m quiet and I didn’t try But do you think you could take a look And read me like your favorite book And it’s fine if you don’t know my name I’m gonna love you all the same And wish you the wealth of wisdom and heart I never thought we’d be so long apart
Cheers to you Stephen O’ Brien You made the days feel like they were flying When I was stuck in a peculiar hell And you were the one that I’d tell Now I’m raising a glass to your sincere Your beautiful and held dear With your rugged ways and your intone We’re just talking on a video phone And I catch myself then laugh out loud You are something to be proud Of now the days are short You’re something yourself I retort As we’re held in this glance for a moment or two There’s just something about you I wonder if space and time Would ever repaint your days as mine And I know you could call this therapy But you’ve got to know what you mean to me As I throw asunder all the folds And creases to be brave and bold You can’t believe this is all I am There’s more to me and I know you can See beyond the apparent face To the depths of profound Grace To the love that’s held between us both I’d wear you like an overcoat As you just laugh and crease your eyes And I’ve got no time for goodbyes Just the moment that’s held in a stare I love you coz you were there And made me feel like I was home Instead of in a room all alone I gotta know, you gotta see What would the days be like if we We’re to make this something else I know I’m getting ahead of myself But you’re magnificent and perfectly prose And I’d walk down any of your roads If it meant that I could catch your eye You’re alright, man, it’s worth a try
I trudged through the snow I am miserable or don’t you know No reply Why on earth does everyone die My feet crunch the ground I savor the essence of unreciprocated sound I mumble aloud And relish the silence away from the crowd And grumble two tone Why do you always leave me alone? It’s always like this Together for a moment and then you just miss All the ways you felt complete The gravel groans beneath my feet As I haul the bin up the hill If only love was an effort of will I could turn this around But emptiness is the only sound And I cherish the day He looked in my eye and then looked away It’s in a video reel And for years anger is all that I feel How dare you take him away There’s no point reaffirming that he cannot stay But the eyes are all empty as I look for a reason A kind of vacancy that is all out of season Perhaps my misery Will prove how much he meant to me But the anguish just twists And I merely coexist With the essence of death Counting each in and out of my breath Or heartbeat It’s iambic pentameter against my feet Anyway I don’t believe in what they say They’re all crying And then proclaim Heaven is for the dying
Flashback, it’s been twenty years So I question my thoughts and dry my tears To the age of youth And the darkness of day the sun didn’t suit But I found him there, among the ashes and the rubble He looked at me and burst my little bubble And I give thanks to what once I hate The God of Love to make me irate By stealing all I could call my own I’m lying in bed and praying for home But it never comes Oh, the trauma of being young I’m undone And somehow I feel this song has been sung By someone Years before I begun It’s getting old Like the body I hold And the days are all long Then suddenly short And all of the principles that I exhort Prove to be vain And I stand outside in the pouring rain To catch the air Do you believe in the power of prayer To let go into Can I be Something more Than destiny Because this body I wear Is all athletic and long brown hair Do you resonate With what is only a temporary state We’re all on the move From the moment of spark to the point that I prove What have you got to lose Only the worldview you live to excuse What don’t you settle here Under a tree as it breathes you clear
I snap out of it Is to give in the same as to quit And I’m going with it A sort of defiance I never admit But the beer bottle’s empty and I’m reaching for wine I am the queen of a helluva time But really it’s empty coz I cannot decide Which stop is my own if this life is a ride I breathe in the air And think of the way he suddenly stare A moment out of time Like immortal just stepped out of line And my gumption and war I don’t know what this is for As I twirl his name On my fingernails like it’s just the same As yesterday He pierced the veil then went away And I love him so But goodbyes around every corner, you know And I wish and hope He’s found someone real, something cool, something dope But anyway Returning to that which I cannot say It hit me like light And set a fire to ignite And I’m all the trees The wood of could you ever believes And I see his face A recognition no time could erase To be angry at God Give him back to me again, oh Lord But it doesn’t work that way Apparently and what I say Falls on deaf ears And is it just temper to coax the tears Until I can’t stop them and they pour as rain I’m awake in the night all over again To be left behind Is to spend some time trapped in your mind
But He woke me up And He called that love Though I can’t express What I’m thinking of Caught in a decider So perfectly fate And the present moment Means you don’t wait But I’m always counting time On the watch, on the clock that isn’t mine Do you think it could be That we all live eternally In some dimension In a realm of time that by extension Means we don’t have to suffer And I’m always thinking of her And what I’ve lost I sob til the tears exhaust My futile will It’s everything that must fill The pail of water to the brim I remember when it was the two of them Under the sun By the gate They wouldn’t approve Of me in this state But how am I To know the reason that they die If I don’t weep It’s kind of like some bargain I keep But it’s letting me go The pain and the suffering you know And pay testament to The Heavenly I found in you And remember quiet That I don’t have to try to defy it Only surrender Maybe love is what I engender
Your smile sparkles diamonds
Against the windowpane
And I wonder has all my
Searching been in vain
As I catch each apple
That falls from the tree
Pondering the ways
Of gravity
It's Newton's Laws
But bending space time
Like the equations
Of Einstein
And I move like the ocean
And you just soar
Like a meteor shower
To adore
As you come in waves
To lap the shore
I hope you know
That I wanted more
But settle for less
Or just what I have
The moment is now
And all the feeling bad
Has left with a glance
At your heavenly face
You're not a dream
I have to chase
But follow round
To its conclusion
And you were there
In my confusion
As I sense a space
In between the lines
And you are like forests
But ten thousand times
You're like the beauty
I don't get to touch
I hope you know
I love you so much
There are a hundred love stories
Waiting to be told
And the ways are ancient
And the waves be bold
Cause the fire ignite
In ancient hue
And I am
Still dreaming of you
Though it has been eons
And millions of years
As we spell them out
In separate spheres
The suffering can either harden you
Or make you warm
That is my take
On the storm
Of breeze as it's blowing through
What is at the heart of you?
Do leaves rustle through the grass
When you don't get what you ask
But offer up to the sky
That you don't know the reason why
And find the answer in the pause
There is no effect to cause
Will you marry me?
Is the love you give free?
Oh, the two of you!
What in the world am I going to do?
She shines like a diamond, new and serene
He looks like he's been plucked out of somebody's dream
And they both run around with their heads in the sky
The Heavens only know the reason why
She's always been there for me, she's a friend
He's bequeathed with a beauty I can't comprehend
And she is a star of her own making
I breathe every breath to match the one she's taking
He owns every pavement he's sure to walk
She worries what I say is all talk
And we both are two branches that meet in the middle
The answer is found in the midst of the riddle
But there from the cheap seats the two of us dance
It seems like fate gives us every chance
To be the pair from on high
See you later is not goodbye
But he is mercurial and hard to predict
She's a free spirit and will not commit
Unless it's been divinely ordained
But one look at her face and you'll see it is pained
By all of her half hearted sashay away
He'll be the one to save the day
If I could only catch a glimpse of his eyes and his lashes
I'd know the truth before the plate smashes
How can I measure the clock
With all that I've been and all that I'm not
Is success all you're after?
I never had you but for the laughter
And he's so irritating, he infuriates!
But would you go on a sequence of dates
With him if he asked you to
Does he have your approval too?
And she smiles and nods and then rolls her eyes
And he is the stormy in all my skies
Could I be there hero in his
There's no way of knowing exactly what this is
But I wait at the break of every wave
To see if I could be the one who he gave
His heart and his hand unto
I know I'm a dreamer but I want to
Let you know in serious regard
I cherish you throughout the time in the yard
And run into your arms whenever they open
Though it's been a decade or more I am hoping
That you'll forget the passage of time
And give in to accept the love that is mine
And is it all just something I dreamed in my mind
Will you forgive me for what I left behind
He stares at me with eyes of depth
And I know I'll never forget
The feel of their stare on me
Could I love our liberty?
If it means you're miles away
With someone else to star your day
Or maybe not or maybe true
I've stopped running after you
But still I feel the emptiness inside
And I know I cannot hide
It for very much longer
Do you wish that I was stronger?
Or weaker if resolve is will?
I don't think I have the skill
To keep it from you anymore
I'm on the other side of the door
In anticipation of the knock
To enunciate what I am not
And what I am I'll never know
I just want to say I love you so
It was years
Since I stopped believing
I opened the door
And along came Stephen
He reminded me
With his casual eyes
That even a stranger
Can see through disguise
And all of the advances
I couldn't stop making
Were held in suspense
With the breath I was taking
And it was ancient
Yes it was old
But this was a story
That's never been told
That's always been waiting
In the wings
I know it's a bird
Because, my Lord, it sings
And reverberates
Without any doubt
Can I trust the words
That pour from my mouth
And herald a new dawn
One that's bursting forth
And the river is free
Though it runs its course
And brings it back
To rain in the sky
I wonder do you
Know it's a lie
When I look away
From your brief glance
It was heaven
It was happenstance
It was a moment
And it was soul
He blinked his eyes
And the waves roll
Do I set diagrams spiraling out into the wind
And is to be alive to say I have sinned
Coz there's all of this perfect I won't get to be
I'm just clearing my eyes so I can really see
And what does the lens do to the light
It focuses it on the retina, right?
Then the brain turns the picture the right way round
Like the way it interprets sound
And do you ever wonder about the mystery we are
How the atoms inside us are the same as a star
And we have galaxies within our soul
It's only the body that's getting old
All my life I've been standing on the stairs
No putting on graces, I'm not putting on airs
I'm not trying to be better than I've become
I'm just opening up and letting the One
Move through me like a river to sea
I don't know where I'm going or what I'll be
All I know is I feel the pull
And the longing start to dull
As it unfolds unto a new expanse
I watch the whole world start to dance
To the music of a perfect refrain
It's being lifted out of the pain
It is being called at the edge of the circle
On the rock we call Earth as it begins to hurtle
Through the density of time-space
And you can see through the dreams that you chase
As you find yourself back in the same old place
Believe and relive the burden you face
The Poetry Book 