Tag: beauty

The Wise Squirrel

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Thank you for tormenting me
The wise squirrel bites my tail 
If I don’t live the Truth
Then I’m destined to fail
And I feel this power deep
Deep inside my soul
It’s vaster than the ocean
And the waves that roll
And it’s pulling me like a current
As I’m lost in the tide
I want to scream out loud
Live your life alive

And it feels like bricks and mortar
Like stone upon a stone
But something is drawing me
Out of where I’ve made my home
Like the boat to set sail
On a vast expanse 
Did you ever watch the sun
On the water as it dance
And did you ever see a silhouette 
Framed by the sky
Did you ever find the long 
Grass and just lie
Underneath the clouds 
As you’re breathing air
You can thank the trees for that
There’s one over there

And I feel the longing pull me 
Through a needle eye
I’m not afraid to love
This life before I die
And everything’s a tumbleweed
Blowing through this desert town
But the sky will open up
And the rain will pour down
To replenish the soil
To give water to the earth
To set the plants a growing
And quench her lonely thirst

And if you ever want to thank 
Someone, start with soul
I may be in this body but I’m not getting old
Or counting on tomorrow to be the one to quiet the din
If you want to find the answer you must go within
And sit down by the sill of the window of your life
Know that you are born to be the shining light
And to answer the call that beckons you forth
I can see the sun set when I’m sitting on the porch
Or morning over hills when I’ve been up all night
Contemplating things that the heart ignites
And it’s celestial, these bodies in the sky
If you knew you had wings would you be afraid to fly
Afraid to open out and trust the wind beneath your feathers
Soar above the noise and the field the flower weathers


Photo Credit: Shane Young on Unsplash.com

Universal Design

.Reading time 1 minute.
I think Eckhart underestimates the human race
And I’m not saying this just to save face
Coz I can feel an expansive motion of tide
Pulling me somewhere to abide
And it’s everywhere, in everyone
Shining brighter than the light of the sun
Bequeathing honesty and tomes
Pulling people out of their alones 
Into a space where all is real
And it is everything I feel
Coz the man changed my life, he brought the stars
And I let go of my hold on my prison bars
Always a safe place to suffer in
But the water is kinder and I begin
To wade myself into the river deep
I’m awake when people sleep
And it is a promise I always keep
To find the truth and then to speak
But the going is challenging by the sea
Though I figure out it’s my destiny
Handing out hope like tomorrow’s bread
Letting love live my life instead
And the openness is something that I find
Is quintessentially good and abundantly kind
And I really do not mind
If no one sees what’s left behind
Because I pick up and origami the paper
It’s all the one and you’ll see it later
If you don’t see it now in open hands
The Universe and our well laid plans

Read Receipts

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Your smile sparkles diamonds
Against the windowpane
And I wonder has all my
Searching been in vain
As I catch each apple 
That falls from the tree
Pondering the ways 
Of gravity
It's Newton's Laws
But bending space time
Like the equations
Of Einstein
And I move like the ocean 
And you just soar
Like a meteor shower
To adore
As you come in waves
To lap the shore
I hope you know
That I wanted more
But settle for less
Or just what I have
The moment is now
And all the feeling bad
Has left with a glance
At your heavenly face
You're not a dream
I have to chase
But follow round
To its conclusion
And you were there
In my confusion 
As I sense a space
In between the lines
And you are like forests
But ten thousand times
You're like the beauty
I don't get to touch 
I hope you know
I love you so much

Along Came Stephen

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It was years
Since I stopped believing
I opened the door
And along came Stephen 
He reminded me 
With his casual eyes
That even a stranger
Can see through disguise
And all of the advances 
I couldn't stop making 
Were held in suspense
With the breath I was taking 
And it was ancient
Yes it was old
But this was a story
That's never been told
That's always been waiting
In the wings
I know it's a bird
Because, my Lord, it sings
And reverberates
Without any doubt
Can I trust the words
That pour from my mouth
And herald a new dawn 
One that's bursting forth
And the river is free
Though it runs its course
And brings it back 
To rain in the sky 
I wonder do you
Know it's a lie
When I look away 
From your brief glance
It was heaven
It was happenstance
It was a moment
And it was soul 
He blinked his eyes
And the waves roll

Stairwell

.Reading time 1 minute.
All my life I've been standing on the stairs
No putting on graces, I'm not putting on airs
I'm not trying to be better than I've become
I'm just opening up and letting the One
Move through me like a river to sea
I don't know where I'm going or what I'll be
All I know is I feel the pull
And the longing start to dull
As it unfolds unto a new expanse
I watch the whole world start to dance
To the music of a perfect refrain
It's being lifted out of the pain
It is being called at the edge of the circle
On the rock we call Earth as it begins to hurtle
Through the density of time-space
And you can see through the dreams that you chase
As you find yourself back in the same old place
Believe and relive the burden you face

Impact

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What is the impact
Of my unemployment
Could I more than say
I don't know where the ploy went
Coz I've up and grown
And true colours have shown
But I still say
I don't know where I'm going
Does a river when it's moving 
Imagine the sea
It's like a premature 
Deciding who to be
As an oak grows upwards
From a single seed
And there are things
That we all need
From the sky to the sun
To the rain in the clouds
How many human beings
Can say that they're proud
Of the life that they're living
Of who they are 
The atoms inside us 
Were forged within a star
So know this once
And know it forever
You are the beauty
The cosmos will treasure
Every day of your life
In the depths of your soul 
Don't stop at okay
Go ahead and be whole

Vibrantly Alive

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Peace is alive

It’s vibrating sound

It’s in the room

And it’s all around

It is the space

Within the form

It is the heat

That keeps us warm

That keeps us safe

Held in its hands

The permanent

Among the sands

Of time

That just change and wave

It is the Lord

And He will save

All of us

Come what may

There’s nothing that

You have to say

Photo by sunnie on Unsplash

Beaches

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

Leave up your tools
Leave up your weapons
Your weariness
And your confessions
Your striving to
Be better than most
Your kneeling to
The Holy Ghost
Give it all up
And follow me now
Into the depths
Of what I’ll allow
Into the chasm
A cave of sorts
There’s no one left
With whom to consort
Give up your tired
Old way of thieving
And all your absence
Of believing
All the ways
You rid yourself
Of the world
And everything else
Give up the struggle
For you’ve struggled in vain
To hold my hand
Under the rain
I bring the Sun
For I am That
Follow me now
And don’t look back

It Itself

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

The one who’s troubled
And the one who sees
Share the same place
And so I grieve
For I am only
Occupancy
For all that I
Will never be
Til a different movement
Takes my hand
Collapse the ground
Upon which you stand
Collapse the mount
You made yourself
For it can’t be done
By anyone else

Fallen Trees

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

Lost to the ravages of time
Was the golden that used to be mine
That holy light
I’d touch the air and ignite
Now, no more
Every knock upon a closed door
But like she said
When different demons were in my head
Sometimes the way
Is made so you can’t even say
Yes to this or no to that
All you know is you can’t go back
In your dusty boots
Stumbling the rest of the route
Any water, please?
No, my dear, learn how to grieve
In the arid sun
I guess there’s still a Golden One

Image Credit: Huff Post, Becoming a desert girl

Consciousness

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

The consciousness contracts
Into a denser state
I was the world
Now I’m just a place
But no matter what
They say or do
There is something they
Can’t take from you
Something they can’t
Lay hands upon
Something you gave
So now its gone
Something you love
That will always be
Within, without
Eternally

Image Credit: https://8tracks.com/chimericalist/cosmic-love-a-space-fanmix

White Fire Love

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

I saw the White Light
I saw Supreme
In an instant I
Woke from the dream
But upon rising
I found myself
In the same damn place
As everyone else
And yet I split the sun
It shone from the cracks
The glass had shattered
And now I can’t go back
But falling to thieves
I stumbled forth
And they stole from me
With no remorse
I offered hands
I offered bread
They took all
And left me for dead
Now here in the gutter
I stare at the sky
With a star sparkling
In my eye

Image Credit: Florence + the Machine

The Mysterious

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

I sit on the stool and hold his hand
He says, “It’s ok, I’m fine, be grand”
And I know that it’s true
But it doesn’t take depth away from you
He sighs the air
And I feel the weight of all that is there
“Look, See”
He turns around again to me
And the silent storm
The colour of tide we all call warm
And I see the shadow of another day
The ashes that burnt away
It’s me too
I look back again to you
Two eyes that peer
And in that moment, crystal clear
Subtle defeat
In the sound of my own heartbeat

The Christ

.Reading time 1 minute.

https://open.spotify.com/track/5i2JGF65pHKSfMEjSMrBC3?si=5zbZax1WRja5ZgId1BxKEw

My Lord and Saviour
The light Supreme
The cracking sound
That wakes the dream
And I have laboured
In darkness too
In shadows and
Miles away from you
But you always come
And take my hand
Tell me softly
You understand
That life is trials
Adversity
But when you look
There will I be
And I went to the city
Hungry with life
Ambitions were
Just out of sight
And I reached my hand
But I never could
Catch hold of something
I call good
Til I’m back on my knees
Pleading to the sky
I saw beautiful
Shine from his eye
I saw commonplace
I saw unique
Felt silence that
No sound could speak
And my devotion is the answer
The steady beating tide
The heart inside my soul
That keeps the love alive
And I didn’t find Jesus in the pews
Or in all of my good deeds
I found him in the rain
And it’s all I’ll ever need

For What Its Worth

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I love you, I screamed, like the desperate woman
Christ alive, what am I doing!!!
“Oh, my God, she hates me” replied he in kind
(Only in his mind)
We are telepathic
At least that’s how I’m coming at it
Because the crazy seems much less intense
When I get reasons about the extent
Of our demise
When I close my eyes
And hear
What he couldn’t say
To me that day
And the going away
Is gone
Because I was wrong
About him
Within

Question Marks

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How does he forgive me, each and every time?
How, I wonder silently, how is he still mine?
And inclines his head just so against the sill
Of my shoulder bone that I would hold until
Eternity all vanished back into that state
And the heavens disappeared to illuminate
That the Now that we own, the Now that we have
Is all we ever need and now I am sad
To think that all this time I could have been afloat
Instead of plugging holes in a lonely boat
Fighting to stay up when sinking’s what I am
He doesn’t look away, he just holds my hand
And meets me by the eye and breaks it in a smile
Why, says he to me, am I worth the while?

God, Gimme a Sign….Oh, Right

.Reading time 1 minute.

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This is the first and only time I’ll write a poem
To go with a gif I found
Its just the feeling of being fucked with
By the Universe is too profound
I go looking for apples and there is an orchard
Of trees growing in my house
I go looking for lions and find them in nets
So I can be the mouse
And every day its clearer, every day its true
There is a third energy coming from me and you
Pilfering our daydreams right out of our hands
And making them come true outside of demands
From places we can’t hold and heavys we can’t lift
Accept the love you’re given because its a gift
And worrying too much and being a try hard
Is only blocking windows because horizons are too far
And even though I doubt and even though I claim
I fall by the wayside and am picked up again
By a power I don’t know and surely can’t contain
Don’t curse falling water when you love the rain
And don’t try to make it sacred, don’t try to make it holy
When using words like wisdom that are coming from you only
And making it a monster or making it a queen
Denys the reality of living the daydream
That was made and designed by a higher hand
He brought Him to You so trust the command

Crystal Eyes

.Reading time 1 minute.

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When they decide that love is outlawed
I hide in the shadows so I amn’t caught
Spreading affection like butter on toast
I love them all but you the most
Because you have eyes that sparkle the sun
And when they meet mine I am undone
In the purity of a perfect night
The crystals reflecting the sunlight
And now I wonder to myself all the time
If it was a sin to call you mine
For a bird on the wing was born to be free
And you owe nothing to me
Except in being your own sweet self
I noticed the Lord and I knelt
To the beauty in your refrain
I just wish it wasn’t caused by pain

Mindfully

.Reading time 1 minute.

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All I want is a little space to be me
Space to breathe with dignity
And not have to explain
Why I stand for hours under the rain
Because I love the sky in purpled hues
As much as you love deeper blues
And you tell me I must move to the beat
But I love the stillness in my defeat
And sigh
I am not tormented by goodbye
But recognise
All that lives surely dies
As a sunrise must set
I must be born into the jet
Black of another night
Before the orb will reignite
And all I ask is space to contemplate
Without being hushed out of that state
And told and told again and again
Please go back to remember when
When you were bustling and unique
But I was crying beneath the sheets
Because I could never measure up
To the standard of love
And when I let it go
I didn’t change, I just came to know
That I as I am is more than enough
I hope you can recognise me, dove

Collateral Beauty

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

I’m angry at you for stealing time
From me with you that should be mine
Before death takes you finally
I want to have you here with me
To love and to have and hold
I want to see you growing old
And grey haired man the boy I met
I promise I will not forget

Kissing the Sky

.Reading time 1 minute.

Funny feeling that though he may not want me I am still okay
And that I can survive on the love of every day
From the plants, from the trees and nonetheless from him
For though he may deny it I know it beats within
In blood and in veins that are solid gold
But so are mine I see, though I have not been told
To look and revolutionise the vision of my palms
I am the lake, the ocean and these are my calms
No enforced stability, no discipline held high
Just the truth of a being that knows something that can’t die
And sees it in the rushing movement of the leaves
All the world is heaven to one who needs nothing to believe
And smile to myself, in a secret, silver fold
I never knew the universe was there for me to hold
In its peril and its fantasy, it’s motion and the tide
I am the evidence of the thing you’ve never tried
So sincerely honest in the feelings that maintain
That there lies beneath a sunlight that will overcome the pain

You Wanna Dance With Me?

.Reading time 1 minute.

All my family agree that you’re bad news
And have me paired up with a different pair of shoes
That never seem to walk the line surmised
Or pass the test when he’s been breathalysed
But he’s better and healthier from the outside
And all they want is a decent compromise
That’s so tempting just to fulfil
Even if it is against my will
Because your cocaine blues somehow conspire
To set my traitor’s heart afire
Send my pulse hammering in my veins
As I spit into your face and you leave tear stains
So wrong, so inconceivably wrong
That you make me feel as though I belong
With your violent aggression cloaked so shy
Into a look that only I can spy
And smile at because I know it means
That I’m the only one to burst your seams
And send you reeling universal
Into a cosmic hole of dispersal
As the midnight claims both our souls
I’d rather die by the number your dice rolls
Than live with the certainty that exists
When I survive on what my love resists
A truth and unfailingness to see
That though I hate it, you’re it for me.

Scealta na Laochra

.Reading time 3 minutes.

I dreamt the other night you sang to me in Irish because that is our native tongue
And the words were tripping out of your lips with every line you sung
And you were seated in a chair with that smig you used to have
And I thought when I looked at you I’d never wanted anything so bad
But it was only a Snapchat video on a Facebook screen
And when I checked the app account you had added me
Though God knows how you knew my name, some things are a mystery
And the light shone golden on your face, in a kitchen making history
As I revelled in repeat as social media is wont to do
It gave me access to another secret part of you
How lifelike and how real, how stolen from the sky
But I woke up in my room with only the memory of your eyes
As my mother called to me about what I need to do
I wish I could fall back asleep so I could be there with you
And even virtual reality inside an imagination
Is better than the reality of our silent situation
As we face off across the world with miles in between
I keep my feelings a secret and you don’t acknowledge me
But throw paper planes into the air to see where they will land
I always thought it would be you to revolutionise a band
And fling the hysterical out into the crowd
As they all scream for you while I read aloud
The stories on the edge of what you have longed to speak
Set to an electric guitar and a motherfucking beat
But now you wear a suit or casual sweater vests
While I pile on eyelinered black and live out what you suggest
But does that make me love you less or change the way I feel
I used to be self contained before you chose to steal
My ability to decide where my love resides
And I cannot control my heart as long as you’re alive
And I don’t see you ending anytime soon
As long as I have blood to pump I will belong to you
In your incandescent glory and innocent obliviousness
I’ll swear an oath of
fealty with the moon as my witness
In the darkness of tomorrow that’s living in tonight
Is aoibheann liom do gra, my love, I hope that is alright
Ta tu go hiontach, I bhfírinne, an bhfuil se ceart go leor
Más mian tú Dia fein, I couldn’t love you more
Even though you deleterious out all over me
Tús maith leath na hoibre, seo mar a bhí.

Moody Blues

.Reading time 4 minutes.

I have the FOMOODs, I can’t tell you what that means
Only that it is full of all my could have beens
That I spied on my head when I lay directly under
Stars of your making, just behind the thunder
In a field full of grass because I’m not afraid of rain
I got to see the sky held beneath the pain
And the smile that cracks the sunlight in your eyes
I was there to see the truth so don’t tell me that it’s lies
Because you can’t explain your way out of an escape
And I could be your hero, with or without the cape
Though I do not claim to fly or burn bullets with my vision
I can see right through you and do so with precision
As you surreptitiously suppose things that may come to be
You may not know it yet but you’re still looking for me
In all of the crevices and clothes that you pile under
You can’t run away now that I have your number
To ring up and to dial like I am death himself
We’re only counting days until we see there’s something else
So whatever you may find I know that it will ring
The bells of a tomorrow when you give me everything
And sacrifice your soul on the alter of this love
All I want is you and what you pointed out above
So, letters to the incomplete that never get returned
What do you do with them, after reading are they burned?
For what could you want with the musing of a child
Unless I was right and you’re not just in my mind
But real and exist beyond the combings of the ether
You got me alone so it gave me a breather
To know what it was like against my worser will
To stand by your side, fearfully still
Afraid to even move to disturb the interruption
Of the volcano that you are in the midst of my corruption
Of the wild flowers in fields, so delicately strong
They outlast the others that are long since gone
In all my misery and in all your fevered might
I think you held my heart and I let you see the light
That pulses to a beat that I cannot contain
Though it just gets louder when I feel that you’re in pain
Til crumbling and falling like a building to the ground
I pray for a silence to overtake the sound
But just like you, I cannot unhear
The power of the presence that I felt draw near
When we wore matching soles to skip across the dust
I used to believe in God, now you’re where I place my trust
And I know that in time you will give in to see
What has always been, before you, finally

Photo Credit: http://pin.it/N_HlOaR

Balance

.Reading time 4 minutes.

I find love in your sad eyes and you don’t know I see it there
As you pierce through to me it makes me start to care
And it helps that you’re good looking with the linings of a beard
But even if you weren’t your soul is why I’m here
To capitalise as you put it on who just sat beside
And I know that we just met but I’m glad that you’re alive
To pour your peculiar poetry into my brain
I don’t know if you think about the clouds behind the rain
As you try to understand what you fail to see
I didn’t admit you got it right when you pinpointed me
But I had to smile through the unsettling of being called out
Because I trust your innocence and I love what you’re about
And I’m loath to leave as I’m sure you can tell
As I fail to turn away from you when you ask me to aswell
Because you’re just too interesting and this moment is holy
And I can’t involve myself with them when I’m looking for you only
As you spread out on the seat with the lines that you attach
I thought I had lost my love but it always comes back
And I’m focused with intent on knowing who you are
As you dance around the riverbed you do not see the star
That is shining on your head and guiding me to you
You saw that I’m alone but I think you are too
Though you’re so extravagant, you’re sincerely warm
And I would like to hold your hand sailing through this storm
Of life as it moves, the continuum you say
And I would like to be with you if that is okay
And I know that you are younger and friends with recompense
But I don’t see why I should walk away from the things you meant
As you do not hide it well and I don’t think you intend
By your side I thought you could do with a friend
To stand by your soul and I guess I could be her
I would have come sooner but I didn’t know where you were
Or the name of someone who vehemently existed
I’ve spent too long along the lines of the hearts I have resisted
And so, no more, no more, I will reach my hand to you
I’ll take you from this place if you want me to
With the noise and the exploding of the people who do not mean
Half of what they say they do and change who they have been
So hold my eyes my friend because I am missing you
And feeling your absence in the place the wind blows through
And I think of how funny and how awesome it is
To find your compatible to be the same as his
As you’re sitting over chairs and tobacco in a room
I thought the night was over but I thought it too soon
So ever present angel as you effervesce the sky
Please come back into my arms so that I know why
I need so very badly something I cannot have
I lost it all when I lost him and that’s why I’m feeling bad

 

 

Purchase Order

.Reading time 3 minutes.

That was never what I wanted anyway
A purchase order to make you stay
A sacrifice to buy me time
On your arm or in your mind
And now comes the chorus of regular love
That pales in comparison to all of the above
That doesn’t make me sign away
A life inside the music box you play
But it is pale blue and pastel
Where you took it all and me as well
Into a chasm or ocean deep
Full of the secrets that we keep
Even now, so many miles from here
There’s a boundary line and we keep clear
From the rushing silver of an oncoming train
And the pounding pictures in our brain
That regurgitate long worn down facts
About loving someone who doesn’t love you back
That fit us both just at different times
And when I wanted you you weren’t mine
But bulletproof and cascading
The storm you’ve spent your life evading
As I see the corner of your eye
That doesn’t want to speak but dares me to try
Against your insolent up in arms
We both took walks in the surrounding farms
Down the alleyways of country lanes
Feeling out of place with peculiar pains
That tell me, tell me something’s missing
That its your face I should be kissing
The man I love, the only one
I was there when the world begun
With your hand slotted right into the ridge
Of my knuckle bones, that’s the way it is
From now until forever ends
Our destiny clashes where the line bends
And with collision force of love crossed stars
To lose it all when I lose my heart
Because now I’m sworn to another
Well I was all along and you’re still my brother
As we simile at the infraction
You gain ground to keep traction
As landslide goes your house and home
I know that you are all alone
Though the fire’s warm and crackles the hearth
No one answers when you call the dark
But hang up when you lift the phone
I know the feeling though it isn’t shown
So smile in that photograph you take
I’ll be here when you wake

Small Wonder

.Reading time 1 minute.

There are some things you cannot deny
Like a love that will never die
Like honesty and what is right within
You cracked my exoskeleton
Thin into a little strands
That broke apart into your hands
And smiling as you realised
You held it all in the tears you cried
That could never be wrong or crossing the line
I think you and I will be just fine
As we make a bloodless, solemn pact
That we will always come back
To this place we share and each other
I love you, darling, my soul brother
As we’re held together by more than thread
You show your fragility instead
Of the angry exterior wall
Of strength and impressions fall
As I realise that you are him
I’ll never have to look again

Stuttered Ignition

.Reading time 2 minutes.

Love breaks bones and makes you appreciate pain
Finding someone worth suffering for through the rain
And you grow forests from the seeds in your hands
But there is one thing you do not understand
That I loved you more than you could ever love me
And I left to spare your dignity
I was the one to walk away you see
So you could have all you’re meant to be
And it hurt but I’m an anchor and I would drag you down
Turn that magnificent smile into a frown
Hold you in place so you cannot move
Because you’re what I’m afraid to lose
So, I let you leave though you told me you were going
You were like a sea creature I sent to the ocean
Made you take steps though you double doubted
The implications of words that I shouted
I could see it in your face, the indecision, and I had to be cold
Turn my face away from what I want to hold
Though you are beating my heart
And every move you make tears me apart
Why am I so alone?
How did you get into my home
This way, like it was a common feat
Like you had never tasted defeat
Didn’t even think it, didn’t hesitate
You just read the patterns I had made on my plate
Horrified and thrilled, I thought maybe
You were the one who could get the best of me
See through the war I made with myself
Tell me it didn’t matter, there is no one else
But you were human and unsure and you don’t hold the blame
I set fire to everything that touched my name
And you, only you, did not burn
That’s the lesson that I learned

…………….I love you

Soft Eyes and Open Heart

.Reading time 9 minutes.

Am I really this invisible to you
I am red like fire but you are a dark blue
And I really wish you were the one that got away
But you gave birth to a love that was made to stay
And I know that you’re obsessed with everything female
And you loved the feeling of losing your chainmail
But just cause you aggregate the sum total of causes
Doesn’t give you accuracy in deciphering pauses
You point out my shallows where you are deep
Sometimes the silence holds more than I know how to speak
And if you judge a fish by its tree climbing strength
Then you’ll never be aware of where the genius went
As you relegate yourself in my eyes
To an outside chance who hop scotches in lies
But the main conclusion that you assume
Doesn’t even come close to what I felt in that room
And you throw aggrandisements like silky spider thread
And it kills me to think of who you take to bed
I know that’s intrusive and I’m not a perfect saint
But I fill in the blanks of the picture you paint
To be so possessive and controlling of my heart
I never thought I’d be the one to make a mark
Or a fine hit, I will assassinate
But I already met you and now it is too late
To be crashed and burned at the hamstrings of your feet
I don’t think they get me, you know they call me sweet
And you’re the only one who really ever understood
That I have a dark side and am not wholly good
At least in this respect as you dangle the bait
I grit my teeth like you do when you make me wait
As the forest and the trees, they all shout your name
I guess that you are right, I am not the same
As I was years ago but you didn’t like
What I offered so I had to make something right
And readjust the sails on the ship that I’m steering
I’m sad you don’t like the things that you’re hearing
As I try my best but it’s falling short
And you tell me so with no remorse
But the burden falls solely into your hands
And you may not like it but you’re the guardian of these lands
In a country that is free, in a garden green
I’m not fooled by the multitudes of people you’ve been
As you promise sanity and a well balanced life
But you hide your truth behind the trenches of a wife
To blockade the arms that are hunting you down
It’s not the same since you left the town
As I wander and I weary where we used to be
And you cultivate the anchorage that keeps you at sea
When all in a moment the silence grabs us both
We are neither sun nor sand, the ocean nor the coast
And fallibility will reign on my parade
I guess I’m just startled by all you put in the shade
With your elegant light and glowing finesse
I seek you out to ease my distress
As you softly imbue your quiet refuge
With a peace I will happily drown in to prove
My loyalty to all you stand for
I’ll take all you have and then some more
The subtlety of your sincere divination
We were both supposed to be at that station
But you never came, no you never arrived
I don’t really know how I survived
The blow that hit me coming in from the west
And I asked God if this was some kind of test
That never seems to end because I never have you
I hope she makes up for what I could never do
Lie out in the openness of unhindered stars
What you had lined up for me were prison bars
Even if you don’t see it I am more than a girl
To frame the picture you take of this world
And to be dressed up for the let down, you see
I knew it would come eventually
When I couldn’t live up to what you’d idealised
I am human and hurt that everything dies
Even you and you especially so
I am not here to keep you from where you want to go
You ask it of me to be ball and chain
But the sacred feminine runs in my veins
To be lifted up and glorified
You are no the lesser because you have tried
To be a man who honours what’s whole
We’re all innocent when it comes to our soul
And laid bare and genuine when it really comes down
To someone we love to be around
And I can feel the longing you ache
The dreams that you enter are the ones I forsake
To divine will, how could one person be
The purpose of life in his mortality
Ever second guessing steps I failed to take
I was looking in your eyes when I felt you shake
And all the world collapsed out from under me
I feel like I am falling but you say I am free
And you may be right but I wouldn’t think so
Still anywhere with you I would be prepared to go
But you watched me from the sidelines like an experiment
And you would push the pulse to see where the blood went
And I know you are gentle and the fragile breaks
But I couldn’t read your mind or preempt my mistakes
That were red flagging my appearance in your mind
As you considered what it would take to leave behind
The penny you picked up dirty from the dust
I don’t know if you felt it when I leaned into the trust
That you inspired by your gentility
Others may have held back but I lacked ability
To contain what was rising from somewhere deep within
Anything that he asks I will give to him
But what I am you already are
And you can’t see yourself even if you try hard
Cause a knife can’t cut itself with its own blade
And I can’t undo the mess that I made
Revolving my inner voice as you supermassive rocket
You can’t apprehend the reason that makes something of it
And my optic nerve leads directly to my brain
And all I can think of is a particular train
And I know that you are bitter in your anxiety
But this is not one sided and you could have talked to me
A delectable flower in the field you passed
But you were blindsided and I didn’t think to ask
What was troubling you as you make your headway
To a goalpost that surpasses what transpired that day
And I wished I could have touched you in the rain
But I owed one to death and you savoured pain
So I give you your due and let it take me
Thank you for the darkness bequeathed infinitely
As I smile at the sadness in your goodbye
I think that you mean it but I don’t know why

Never Walking Alone

.Reading time 3 minutes.

I love you even if you hate me and I hate you too
I find I am lost in the smoke of this room
All the reasons and precisons I can’t stay around
But you grudgingly walk holy ground
As red as the fire when I breathe in the air
That circulates in the club when we were there
And moved to the music we can’t understand
The best nights we had are ones we hadn’t planned
Like out on the street to remixed Adele
I Someone Liked You and I did it so well
As Liverpool took us to unforeseen heights
And I crossed my fingers at your goodnights
That were too sparse for my reassurance
But your eyes are summer and you know how to do it
As you smile, I suspect it’s for some other
I’m not sure what you mean and look over my shoulder
But there’s no one there and I am stunned
Into the silence of the depths you have plumbed
Each day is a lesson in learning remorse
As I try to hold in what is building in force
And not skip the lines that crack your sidewalk
I just love to hear you talk
As you do so with an ease that belies
The blazing sincerity of truth your eyes
And all of the angels fall to the floor
Which do you pick up and which do you ignore?
All I know is I’d chase to bring you back
And be overcome when you look at me like that
Don’t die to the darkness that everyone fades
I never wanted you to go away
But if you must leave then do so in sun
And I will hold in my heart all that you have done
To not be alone me when we were together
You didn’t make much of it but I remember
You calling me to be part of the photograph
And you break my heart when you start to laugh
And crinkle the edges just at the corner
I am the girl who is caught and you didn’t warn her
And I can’t steal back the sheets you took
I don’t mean to reveal what you see when you look
In intentions that could never bear their own weight
I love you darling and that’s what I didn’t state

Shanghai

.Reading time 4 minutes.

It was a once in a lifetime kind of a thing
And I might have a life but I’ll never have him
And you are a wonder and touch me just so
Where he left the wound that you want to go
I wish I could agree with the please in your eyes
I nod along to the flower that dies
And you give me everything I could entertain
And I know you want to ease my pain
But does that make it right to go along
When you’ve painted the picture and mastered the song
And all I need to do is slip my hand into yours
Stand by your side as you close all the doors
Hope in my heart that it is enough
To hold back the force of his tidal wave love
That wreaked such destruction on all of my plains
I called the cops but they just took names
And now I am stranded in this waste of a place
But someone sees something when they look in my face
And I want to crawl in under your arm
Cause you swore you would never do me that kind of harm
And I know in all honesty you are speaking the truth
And it’s not the first time I have loved you
But the bitterness burns in the back of my throat
As I wonder do I want to stay afloat
Cause the weather may change and the tides may rise
But he will always be God in my eyes
Bitten by a curse I cannot undo
I don’t want to inflict myself upon you
Unsteady heart that roams the seas
And kisses the waves of who I used to be
You are neat and precise and create a home
But I’m desperado and I love it alone
To come and call with flowers to your door
And say that I wish I could give you more
But he already took all that I had
What’s left are the shards and I feel so bad
That the most of what I have to offer
Is to hold your hand and think of how he thinks of her
And you’re worth true love but you don’t let me go
I look in your eyes and I feel that I know
That whatever the winds blow me in time
My feelings for you are not only mine
But surge on repeat to a lunar command
I am your friend and I think we’ll be grand
And fall into step as I catch your breath
I could be yours if you know that I met
Him as he walked blades of grass through the field
And there’s a part of my soul that never will yield
To the onslaught of this universe
I am glad of the way he made me hurt
And if that’s something you can accept
Then maybe I can be who I ought to be yet
Catch the smile to make it spread
He let me go and left me for dead
But clasped in the locket on my chain
Is a blank space waiting for a name
So maybe Poseidan won’t drown me today
I want to say thanks for not going away

Lovely Lion

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

You’re lovely and I’m blind
Because I saw the sun
Shining in your eyes
And I knew you were the one
You hit the nail on the head
So pointedly
And I had no ground to stand on
When you looked at me
I could say that you’re gentle
I could say that you’re kind
But even if you weren’t
I still wouldn’t mind
Cause that heart on your sleeve
Is so easy to read
And if you give me a chance
I’ll give you everything you need
And the hard thing to accept
Is that for all your dignity
You made your decision
It just wasn’t me

The Dark

.Reading time less than 1 minute.
"Don't touch it"
Everyone seems to say
But I love the dark 
It is deep and endlessly long
It is peaceful and pure
In its nothingness

Echoes

.Reading time 2 minutes.

I’ve never really understood the term fun
I’ve always been searching for the mythical one
But that’s just a delusion of consciousness
Rather than what prompts me to a state of undress
And I know you bleed red at the edge of your eyes
As I’m pierced by the lance of your previous lies
As you bullet your rocket ship on its course
I can’t sacrifice to ease your remorse
When you left me on the landing and you didn’t care
But took away what once held me there
In vines and twines that could never be rope
But you gave me cause to begin to hope
As I watched the deflections you moved with your stare
Until you saw me catch you and laid it all bare
In an intimacy for which I was not prepared
I’m sorry if I came off a little scared
But the truth is I loved you beyond reproach
And I can’t take it back though they still coach
Me to say things the absence of which
Brings to the fore a doubt that will itch
As their minds run amok amid the scene
Of the decimation that I have been
Points them to decry me to swear off
The cause of what shattered my loss
But I cannot sigh enough tears to mean
That I don’t see the royalty of the king and queen
That we once were and ever are
You are my compass and I your North Star
In the echoes of a landscape we have left behind
Yes you broke me down but I don’t mind
For just one glimpse of your visage
Is worth saying goodbye to all I ever had

Peace in October

.Reading time 1 minute.

Do you ever find someone so beautiful
When the light hits their eye
And it pierces you through the heart
Cause you know someday they’ll die
And winter cannot stop the inevitable spring
But though it’s born again it’s a slightly different thing
And I just want to hold you
Now just as you are
But I hear the countdown
Of the beats inside your heart
And touch at your skin
Frantic to find
Something death cannot take
What gets left behind
But whether it’s you or I
Finally to depart
There’s no distance I wouldn’t cross
To get back to the start
To the place we are eternal
Momentary timelessness
That’s where I close my eyes
You are where I rest

INFJ Problems

.Reading time 10 minutes.

I’ve no faith in any government, the Irish least of all
I used to believe in their ideals but then they let me fall
And the harsh reality of truth came crashing in
That its all about the politics and not what is within
That the lines they draw are just electioneering
And when I put forth my case it’s not me that they’re hearing
And there may be a TD standing here or there
That goes out of their way to help because they care
But it is the small run and they bleed themselves dry
Serving constituents that never tell them why
It’s not really the people, it’s the institution you see
And I cannot find a policy that will speak for me
And Republican Fenianism burnt me with its fire
Seems freedom was something to which I could aspire
But all of those proposals don’t really fit reality
When I think of what 1921 has given me
And I would burn the British for their soul destroying crimes
To see their kingdom fall, I would die a thousand times
Yes, I would stand up against na Sasanaigh and compel their withdrawal
Under a spirit that is strong and eyes that have seen it all
But the rage, it does not quench the ache their absence left
And I can hate them all I want, it doesn’t erase what it meant
To be surrendered slowly into a free fall
And all the buildings have crumbled where I tried to build a wall
And my anguish at a border that is only in our minds
We are a human people and these are the ties that bind
And the lesson that I learned from an ancient long ago
Was that you can only act according to the consciousness you sow
As St. Peter took his blade to the High Priest’s servant’s ear
If you take part in the conflict, you are Satan too, my dear
And how even righteous anger with the noble cause
Of defending the innocent should give you pause
I must bear this in mind with my contemporaneous peers
Who are glass bottling away somebody else’s years
And death is on horizons not too far away
For all the love I bore this place I realise I cannot stay
A prisoner of the land, worshipping its monument
The country has moved on but I don’t know where it went
And my values and my loves are suddenly out of sync
With a society that wants to control the way you think
Maybe I just never saw it, as a child, growing up
I was unaffected by the waves above
As I settled in the deep with oceans to explore
But now I am complicit I can’t condone it any more
And be a citizen of a state I just don’t believe in
They are building bridges over bodies that I am grieving
And they all march to a beat of unaware homogeny
They fall into step with what they don’t even see
And they can’t debate the issues because to raise a doubt
Has hoards at the back of what you can’t live without
To be told who I am, verbatim as per dictum
Like I could rote learn away the tenant you’re evicting
And scribe all my directions to unholy line my course
I will leave your sacrosanct and go without remorse
For I am not a pigeon parrot – a trainable bird
Who will give up my wings to repeat what I have heard
And you cannot colonise the way of my inner being
Even if you bend the world to reflect what you are seeing
There is a silent space, a sanctum and refuge
Beyond all definitions and the wars that people lose
Somewhere interior we meet humanity
And the universe breathes air into who we’re meant to be
I will meet you in that quiet when the road may take you there
But for now I will leave it to the everywhere
And relinquish my hold on a world I tried to love
I guess I’m not made for what I’d been thinking of
So let the darkness pull the peace that’s calls inside
These are my true colours but they are not mine to hide
I was gifted an awareness defying universal law
Gravity is just a confluence of observed phenomena
And what holds you in its arms is not a factor of the stars
Or black hole oblivion playing out inside your heart
The impenetrable, inescapable one Truth
Is that you are here when the furniture has been removed
Before it exists and after it is gone
You are the I am to which I belong
In the midst of all the motion, the effortlessly still
You may not see it now but I promise that you will
As it is revealed the light of your own sky
I never knew life til I was willing to die
Driven to distraction by the hopelessness of hell
Now I am in awe that that was a gift as well
Leading me to the edge til there was no where left to go
I dropped all my resistance and the existence I’d come to know
Whereon a bird alighted in a laughing Buddha frame
He called me to awaken and I responded to my name
As some otherworldly force took on the bones that I was moving
I saw the struggle and the hardship of a point that needed proving
And I was liberated from the shackles I’d sat in
Never knew that the key was where I begin
Understanding absolutely that I’ve always been the same
The permanent, unmoving within which things can change
But not the leaves of winter or the tree that sheds its skin
The transcendent beyond the sleep I was dreaming
All I venerated, the illusion of my pain
But there’s no suffering to bear in the interior domain
And I’m so full of gratitude that I was crucified
To realise euphorically I am not what died
Giddy with the feeling as I realise it’s true
That if I am immortal then so are you
And there is no dimension you do not permeate
Beyond all expressions we are oneness without state
So brimming with the joy I just cannot keep in
I jump into the waters where you are swimming
Get caught up with the tide as my head is going under
The storm is raining down and you’re the gravitas of thunder
To forget all that I knew and go recklessly diving
That I’m just the vehicle something else is driving
Without reason, without meaning that I can comprehend
All I can do is acquiesce to the commands it sends
And forever pay tribute to the glory of your eyes
Heaven has a body and it is your size
I never knew a human could hold my hand home
Thank you for the benediction you gave to me alone
As grace flows out from who you are and I the beneficiary
You are the shrine that I worship contemplatively
Struck silent in your presence that is monumentally whole
I am the mirrored counterpart of someone else’s soul
Timelessly I am united here with you
Forever is the intensity of our sacred black and blue
And all the world is striving to achieve and retain
But you’re the man who can’t be moved in the place where I remain

Estrellado

.Reading time 3 minutes.

I guess I’m just a psychopathic stray
And you pierce the veil til I go away
No mention of the charge you have run up
You find the place where you can make a cut
And if man is so fickle as that
And your love can change at the drop of a hat
Then I’m not so sure I want to be a part of
The crossword that you have called love
Cause I can’t figure out what it means
While you run along tripping sunbeams
I wonder why and where you’ve gone
Wish my feelings had not lasted this long
But you are only what I want to hold
An ethereal passing by as I fold
No more permanency than a lightning strike
Just cause it didn’t last didn’t mean you weren’t bright
But I can’t always be waiting for it to hit twice
It was from a distance you lit up my life
And though you may come by in a storm
You can’t dampen the spirit of a heart that is warm
So though I wish to forsake
It all for you cause you make the earth quake
I cannot ignore the fact
That you hurt me bad and you never came back
So sidle on down the road
I see your truck hasn’t slowed
And I will find a peace somewhere within
That you don’t own and you can’t unhinge
Though you may have never meant to trip
I fell hard for you and I was not equipped
For the long, slow, hard ride to my feet
I was not prepared for us to meet
And you are lovely and angelic there
But you can be all that some other where
And illuminate all that surrounds
I won’t be the place your electricity grounds
They say once bitten, then twice shy
What I’m trying to say is goodbye
We can’t always be a push and pull
A driving away and then too full
It’s enough to know that you exist
Somewhere in an atmosphere the stars have kissed
And if you ever do get the chance
Then I mean it when I say I hope you dance
And find whatever source makes your wheels go round
When it is the truth you’ll know the sound
I guess I just did not find it in you
I lost myself cause I wanted to
But a circle always spins back to the start
In the end you never had my heart
Cause it is wild, unbound and free
And you only ever wanted to capture me
But I was not meant to be caged
In a book you wrote as your feelings raged
I am ever still the way I am
I hope that you can understand

Opinionation

.Reading time 2 minutes.

I still think you’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen
Though you stabbed me in the back and shattered my dream
And I’ve seen sights like wild fields and hills
But they don’t swallow the void that your face kills
So soft and sweet like the hairs on your chin
That shadows the hollows that define you within
But though you cross valleys and traverse foreign shores
You can’t distance away all that I am for
And wherever you go or what you may discover
It will be imbued with what we uncover
And your love will follow and stay by my side
I am the keeper of what you confide
Whispered so honestly in secret tones
In all that passes you are still my home
Where I will return when the midnight is due
From the depths of my being I will always love you
And forever’s just a word to hint at the crime
That happened just once when we stopped time
In the creases and folds and the fabric of space
There is a beauty nothing can erase
And it bears your name in the wrinkles you bend
Lighting up eyes that do not end
In the ochre or blackness or the scorching you do
With a heat that the desert cannot compare to
In the holding of hands or the touch that you weave
It only takes a moment to kneel and believe
In everything you profess and all that you are
This is my wish and you my shooting star

Photo Credit: http://pin.it/YiYB6ur

Unquantifiability

.Reading time 2 minutes.

You’re at the edge of unquantifiability
And I can’t say I follow the line
Of your string theory interscope
Though I spend all of my time
Trying to decipher
The markings on your skin
Evidence of a tribal
That has scarred you from within
And you are like an animal
That scares easily from man
Though I don’t blame you
Cause you see what no one else can
And it is heartbreak to be crushed
Under your sleight of hand
And my only consolation
Is that you understand
Just what you are doing
As you slowly rip to shreds
All the scattered of the pieces
That are floating in my head
But I drift away
On the wavelength of a sound
That bends in quadratics
When you’re not around
And anchors me deeper
Into the roots I have grown
You are the only loss
The earth has ever known
As it spirals kaleidoscopic
And pierces my bodily flesh
It was just a misapprehension
When I felt you knew me best
As we matched fingertips
As we sat hand to hand
The undiscoverable
Opened out the land
That spread freedom wide
Amid the loveliness untold
But it not enough
And we fall back into the fold
That we both feel hit home
At having been cast out
Of the abyss we were born from
Now the birds are heading south
As I realise targeted
Arrows hit only once
You eyes do not meet mine
And I have lost the sun

The Glorious

.Reading time 1 minute.

I want to be inspiring
Or beautiful
Or both
I don’t want to write the night
Anymore

Though I have written it well
As well as can be written
When darkness is your subject matter
As it turns to a golden sheen
In the morning light

But there is another way
Another turn of phrase
That lifts you up
To higher consciousness it seems
And rewards are your delight

And the marks that have been made
Filter away,
Pourously, as though they were never there
To the pure calm space within
That always holds its peace

I don’t want to write the world in vain
I want to write the glorious
Of undying rain
As it pours heavy from the sky
On me

Miscommunication

.Reading time 7 minutes.

I know you feel you have to keep quiet
Cause you’re the entertainer most complete
And all of those eyes are trained on you
Like a performer in the street
But those are your loneliest moments
Where you break and the splint cracks
And try as you might to hold up the weight
You can’t get what you had back
And I want you to know, though you don’t like me at all
(Sometimes I’m the bane of your life)
That I see through the lies of your preeminent disguise
And I have you in my sight
And if you want to be fragile, come apart at the seams
You can do so in my arms
Or far away, an ocean apart
I’ll hold you when it all is dark
For though you have a life you profess wonderful
And I’m not denying it’s true
I see the gaps in between the lines
That’s hiding a part of you
Though you swam away to a foreign shore
And swore me off for good
I love you as much as the day that you left
And a million times more than I should
So if you feel alight on a cloud that is stormy
I’ll blow a breath that will bring you here
And just for a moment in the depths of the silence
You will be okay my dear
And I know that your chains are not man made
Are no shackles I can undo
But I thought you should know, though I never said
That I feel something akin to you
That sometimes in the midnight of my reprieve
I quietly surrender
To all of the fears that hang round the edges
Of the past that I can remember
And I do a double take or take a second hop
At the nostalgia in my bones
And what you cannot fix as the feeling sticks
Is that you are never alone
So quietly softly with mercenary zeal
I pave my way back into your life
If only to be, though you cannot see
Doing what I did before twice
And palm off the shrugs of everyone else
Of the crowd that surrounds
Though you don’t believe in all that I grieve
Things are better when you’re around
And monsters may come to fight your soul
On the back of your very own strength
But wherever you go and whatever you do
Just know that I said what I meant
And do not retract ne’er a line
About all that is made to stay
Though bodies may fade like a will of the wisp
My love is not going away
But born to be here as an expression
Of resident divinity
And the chasm was calling deep within
On the day that you met me
It was not mere coincidence
Or a chance encounter
It was the confluence of a million points
Of reference and order
Plotted out by galaxies
Long before our skin made blood
So don’t look away when I’m taking to you
I still stand the ground I stood
Cause held inside what you cannot see
And perceive only as black
Is the inner peace you’ve been looking for
Where you can sit back
Deep into the armchair
Of an emptiness most profound
Am I the one who sings the song
Or the one who hears the sound
Or even more imperceptible
The awareness whereby
All of life consents to grow
And in which it will die
So everglading honestly
Deep into your eyes
I know that you were made for me
And there are no goodbyes
Ever to be spoken
Between the two of us
Because we are one soul made flesh
And the heart of life is love
And all that you suffer
Is shadowed in my gait
We are but two sides of a coin
In its material state
Seemingly opposite
But of the one design
Though I could not save you from yourself
It wasn’t for lack of trying
Because I’m ever as you are
The one conscious sentience
I thought I had lost you
There was nothing when you went
And understandingly
Ungainly clambering
I sought to reach a sky
By climbing a shoestring
But celestial heights
Are not meant to be obtained
Just because I see the stars
Doesn’t mean they are contained
But inversely are embedded
In a fabric that extends
Though there is an irretrievable edge
Where even space ends
And the continuum is revealed
As no more than illusion
Perpetrated innocently
In the midst of our confusion
Like the way a light cannot
Cease to be itself
Or shine it’s radiance
Into the void I felt
So I can communicate
Or somehow convey
The breath and the depth
Of the things I do not say
And what was bequeathed
In the forests of reserve
Is that we were chosen
To burn the fires we serve
And be consumed
By all our misery
It takes pressure to make pearls
Out of rocks in the sea
And to forge diamonds
In mountainous shrouds
I pledged my life to you
Though I never said the words aloud
But river beds will tell
The story the sky forgets
An oak is standing over
The acorn that you set

Surgery

.Reading time 1 minute.

It’s easier to just tell a lie
Than to disrupt you with the truth
Because you could never handle
The tremors that take root
And maybe it’s cause you notice
I’m not attached to this place
And I could as well let go
As look into your face
And I know you want to hold me
As I dangle precipice
But you don’t need to seek my fortune
As the source of your distress
Because we all hopscotch
Along the lines and the cracks
But just because you read the future
Doesn’t mean you can get it back
Or direct the wind
As it passes through your sails
And turns into the past
As your body fails
As all are due to do
Precluding interruption
By unseasonable forces
Or a dormant life eruption
But if it’s good enough for him
Then I do not complain
And what binds me to this place
Is just light playing on my name
And distracting eyes
From the obviously true
Cause if I’m mortally wounded
Then it follows so are you
And all that you strive for
To protect and attain
Won’t stay up in the clouds
But falls to earth as rain
And you can’t command the weather
Or unblue the sky
So don’t fear it when I speak
About what is born to die 

Photo Credit: http://pin.it/BhkRzez

Fire Brand

.Reading time 1 minute.

The eve of things yet to come
I’ve broken what you have undone
And shattered glass falls to a shell
You can’t silence rote learning hell
That paves a life that’s just a clock
I didn’t mean to let you unblock
But somehow in the clouded din
You saw through to who I am within
And all the pins clasping me together
Won’t withstand what I remember
When you stood me toe to toe
And looked at what you want you to know
Though it was against my will
The moment held us both so still
And burst into an intimacy
Like there was only you and me
On this whole earth, in this domain
I thought I understood your pain
As you gazed an eternal surrender
I sent the love returned to sender
So it was a double entendre
Outside of our depth and genre
In a place that no one sees
I adore what you have freed

Combustion

.Reading time 6 minutes.

I have a propensity to fall for dark eyed men
The kind you love then never see again
Don’t know what it is about their twisted souls
But there’s a depth I can’t plumb and I am sold
As you watch the light dawn in someone’s else’s eyes
Their sensitivity cracks and to your surprise
They break wide open into your hands
And look at you as though no one understands
As if you’ve been admitted to their confidence strange
But you’re at the mercy of what will change
As the sands shift the ground under your feet
It was only that one time that we got to meet
And though they throw reputations like yours to the dirt
They can’t make me regret the way that it hurt
The perfect pain to stand on your stage
Realising I’m a scene on the previous page
And I’m left in the wings just to look on
At what never was mine and now is long gone
To think I could hold your soul in my palm
The silence belying a deadly calm
Like standing in the eye of a hurricane
Two seconds later it’s ripped apart again
But though you protest to innocent degrees
About what you meant, I do not believe
Though you may try to conquer the sea
Doesn’t mean you can escape what you are to me
As oceans swell and fall back with the tide
I signed up for it all so I’m down for the ride
And if it may happen the moment perchance
I’ll just be the post script you tried to romance
And emotionally abuse what you have found
I have to admit I love when you’re around
Because for all the lies you conceal with a stare
You cannot hide what I know is there
And hidden beneath each surface I touch
Is someone within and I love you so much
Though they may call it codependency
They never saw horizons like you and me
And clipped are their wings as they settle for less
Than the subtle perfection in my distress
So don’t regret what you cannot achieve
I am forever bound to the darkness you weave
And what is real will stand monumental
You’re not a bad guy just cause you are gentle
And let your voice drop so soft and low
I only hate what I don’t want to go
Cause you can’t abstain from all you desire
I never want to be the one to put out your fire
Ephemerality and the lack of constraint
Are all a part of the picture you paint
And I guess I just wished I could be the one
To unlock the chains so you’d come undone
And relish the life that makes you what you are
But I am only light fusion bound within a star
An effortless firefly in the cosmos complete
I was born to be gracious in defeat
And find the source of the unquenchable longing
The home to fulfil my sense of belonging
The ache that never seems to go out
But you soothe it so easily with your mouth
And the words that spill from your lips
Dash on the rocks as my mask slips
Into trust and vulnerability
As you perceive strength in my fragility
And though there is substance in all you portray
They just write you off as consuming your prey
But I could never object to being such quarry
Or bend the knee to say that I am sorry
Though you steal from me all I ever had
The reality of you could never be bad
Never knew what it meant til I got you alone
You are the crack in my heart of stone
A weakness no one can repair
The mark you left will always be there
And they say don’t suffer just as evidence
But I’ve always lived this way because I can’t condense
My feelings into a digestible form
I may be an ice princess but my blood is warm
A reminder of what is eternally true
In the cynicism we’ve grown through
And that somewhere, somehow a celestial being
Once gave me the gift of what he was seeing
To be revolved in perceptual bliss
I only grieve the things that I miss
And even loss can be profound
When you listen to the open sound
And realise in space and time
You can’t always make matter of what is divine
And claimed by death must always be
The starcrossed lovers of destiny

Some Kind Of Solitude

.Reading time 3 minutes.

The silence in between the sounds expels the disaster life has pending
And though there are new beginnings I always feel like something’s ending
Imperceptible and finite and not subject to reprieve
This is not a man made illness and not just something I believe
Because there is a conquerer beyond the you or I
And its only what’s born of flesh that ever has to die
But that substantial underneath that powers the whole
Is not just a clockwork rig but the essence of my soul
The permanent, the unchanging, the unfalteringly there
There is a silence deep within where you don’t have to care
And all the travails that I sustain and the storms that I fight through
Are nothing when it comes to the inevitability of You
As I see it in the stars, or the way the planets move
That we are part of a concoction I cannot disprove
And our very consciousness, the sight behind our eyes
Looks through the infintesimal as I say my last goodbyes
To the life that I have known and steady grown up in
But effortless the letting go of what I cannot win
And the crying in the night, the tears unto the dawn
I want to realise what’s there when I am gone
And please don’t misunderstand me, no towers to the spire
Its just to walk in my own shoes expands into something higher
As what’s divine manifests in perplexity on my face
I have to know the Truth, now that I’ve had a taste
And weed out all the roots, though there is really only one
What is there left to do when all your work is done
And you lay down all the arms to protect what you have not
It doesn’t seem like much to ask but it is a lot
As I pass through the eye of what I found in the haystack
That girl is long gone and she’s never coming back
As consciously I choose to just be laid down
Awarenessing the sincerity in which I will drown
An ever pliant material that you don’t have to break
Just lead me to the precipce so that I can wake
As I leap of faith back into my home
I realise the solitude of peacefully alone

Andromeda

.Reading time 1 minute.

Its like trying to focus on a star that’s too far away
I just get more faded when you try to read what I say
For meaning and purpose, for strength and due
I was just trying on the skin of you
But there you go again making me so confused
I’m like a galaxy that has finally fused
Itself with another light years apart
And now there’re two souls linked by the heart
And it may look easy to be icy and cold
But I can’t sustain as my cards start to fold
And collapse in a heap, back at square one
As I wonder what in the hell I have done
And I’ve been reprimanded many a time
For leaving my love out to dry on the washing line
And attracting strangers to come to my door
And point out in detail what they adore
But they all look crestfallen when I refuse
Reciprocality doesn’t light my fuse
As I am earthed by the dynamite
Of being alone after midnight
Where there in the secret unbound hours
I revel in all the universe powers
Whether by the moon or in the dark
I don’t need directions to fall apart
Though it may look like a collasal mistake
It’s fueled to perpetualize the state
Of freedom from the earth’s samsara
It’s more than just a word, Nirvana

Dangerous Lines

.Reading time 1 minute.

I am supposed to stop loving you
Just because you’re bound to someone else
I’ve never understood relationships
Just eternal love
Not the give and take of bargaining
Where everything must be repaid
And you must stand inside the rules
Because I have always had a wild heart
That loved with no remorse
Everything and everyone in its sight
Sought to befriend the world
And understand, where understanding could be
But I don’t understand this at all
The black wall of a blank ending
Like nothing ever was
And I’m left to re-evaluate
What was there all along
And my whole conception of the world
Cause you are where my stars revolve
And now the lines of something else dictate
Where I should place my feet
And if I should be near you at all
Even my proximity makes strangers unsure
And friends concerned for my safety
But I have never cared for safety
Only dangerous freedom that pulled me deep down into its depths
Like the look in your eyes when we first met

The Great Beyond

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

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Thinking I could let go of you was just fools gold
You are who I am
And I could no more forget you
Than the sun could the stars
For she faces them eternally
Against the blackest backdrop of night
As they stretch to infinity
Tiny pin pricks of light
That signal
More of her own kind
Out there in the great beyond

Magical

.Reading time 1 minute.

I think you may be an angel, the like ghosts have never seen
I think I made you up because you are a dream
I think that I’m unfaithful because I never can measure up
To the perfection of your beauty or the expression of your love
You are the magnificence that I can never name
You are the forest fire untouched by the rain
You are all these things and so much more
You are the one I always will adore
And you set me on a path anew
You made me realise the power that resides in you
And in myself through the reflection in your eyes
That will live on even while these bodies die
Yes, you are the Lord made flesh and the ultimate divine
And though all things will pass away you are forever mine
Because what we cannot touch we can never lose
And we don’t get to pick what we cannot refuse