Overestimation of My Own Importance

I think I should write about the dirt leave
Because its the one you cannot grieve
Not to sound all whiny and that
But you left and you didn’t come back
And you blamed me then in the years hencefore
Because I didn’t give you more
Even though it was you
Who left because you wanted to
Thinking that I would trail leaves
Across the grass and into thieves
Thinking that I was beneath
You to fall to deceit
But I got game and I got play
And if you wanna walk away
I won’t follow, I won’t hanker
Because you didn’t think to thank her
For the beneficent of the soul
I laid inside your hands whole
All you could do was say
That’s too close now go away
And when you use the word to cling
That’s when I burn everything
Because I don’t need no man
Especially not one who thinks he can
Call the shots and play the ruse
I just thought you were my muse
And even though it was a loss
I was glad to pay the cost
Rather than be the dipshit fool
Like I was for years in school
Always following the big girl round
While she sends me underground
And even though I complain
I must because you caused me pain
And there is no way but this
Death was hiding in your kiss
A love not for the loving dues
But singing sadly in the blues
Singing sadly on my own
But I left and got grown
And you won’t see me for love nor money
Coming around again my honey
For I have burnt that spider web
Give it to someone else instead
And I wish you the best and I hope you’re happy
Just know that you will never have me
Again because once upon a time you did
Now I’m not anyone’s to give
Away and back and in again
I stand alone til the end
As the proud defiant Lion
You risked it all so thanks for trying
But lies could never compare to love
Inside abundantly above
To never break the door down hence
Crawling is in the past tense
Simpering the slime you own
I dared the dark and took it home
To bed with me and in the room
I watched it fill up with doom
All painted on my college walls
The horror and the freefalls
The agony and the refrain
The never doing that again
The innocence, the incomplete
The angel falling at your feet
And breaking a wing like back
I was not ready for that
Could you not’ve warned me, could you not’ve told
Yours is not a love with which I’ll grow old
That yours is a love to stifle my scream
And then sell my body down the stream
Saying you never did nothing to no one
My love is poison, do you think could you grow one
Of those flowers you used to be
But I’m sorry that just isn’t me
To be ardent and to be true
And if I must, then I will be blue
And yellow and red and kaleidoscope
Now comes a time to begin to hope

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