How do I write the polarity 
That is screaming every profanity 
Through me onto the page 
And there is a silent rage
That just quenches every candle that I light 
And I throw another draft into the bin coz it’s shite 
And it doesn’t describe the feeling 
Of the reeling 
When you lose someone 
And that gun 
Is still going off in my head 
Because somewhere someone is dead 
And it’s like I could hear the bang 
Every time the phone rang 
To break the news 
And I’m wearing old shoes 
That haven’t fit since I was eleven 
And someone has just gone to heaven 
And it’s a fine story but I’m not sure I believe it anymore 
Because I”m still facing the red door 
That you left behind and that perfume
Pervades every single room 
I ever walk into 
Everything merged with the scent of you 
And I just cry into my pillow 
Because as every weeping willow 
Knows 
When it shows 
The cavalry will come to save 
And I don’t want to face the brigade
I just want to be alone 
And something cuts me to the bone 
Every time someone says your name 
And I think they play piano because it’s a game 
And they think each note is a chord 
But you can take me at my word
I won’t leave this season behind 
Not until I’ve driven myself out of my mind 
Trying to get back to a time before 
The death of someone I adore