A Bite Into The Blue

Taking a bite into the blue
And it comes up the colour of you
As I dive into the ocean
And it’s all rhythmic motion
In the life I cannot live
Is it time to forgive
The darkness of my past
Who knew that this would last
So very long
Correct me if I’m wrong
But you loved that I love that song
As you curl up by my side
Say that I make you feel alive
And now it’s all gone away
What was it you didn’t say
Coz I’m dying to know
And I won’t leave it be so
Just tell me what you need to admit
I looked at you and I sit
Beside you surreptitiously
Vulnerably confess to me
Like a secret you can’t bear to keep
I’ll visit you in the safety of sleep

Hormones

Is it just my hormones
Making me love you
A perfect match
A patch for two
Or is it something deeper
That we might share
I know that I love you
I know that you care
And when all the wilderness
Lets me go
Will I still be there
At the end of the show
Coz I just wanna hold your hand
And have you feel
The decades of love
With which I cannot deal
As they wrap around
The map of your frame
And I twirl on my fingertips
The headtrip of your name

Atticus Finch

Giving myself permission to open up
I’ve got to be vulnerable if I wanna love
And I’m risking the pain coz damn sure it’s there
But I’ve gotta trust if I wanna care
And the wind blows no matter which way I turn
A fire sign has just gotta burn
Til the ashes turn phoenix new
Til I see myself reflected in you
And I know I’ve got problems, I know I’ve got vices
But I am the queen of no compromises
As I utter the truth as it sits on my breath
I say to the sky; don’t let me forget
Coz I wanna grow up, I don’t wanna away
But there’s room in this house for peace to stay
And open the cages that rattle their bars
Twenty odd years and I’m still chasing cars
Down every avenue
Still trying to prove something to you
All now that are watching my every move
But who would you be if you walked in my shoes
Like Atticus Finch and fine thread
Do up your laces and keep up your head
As everything born to beat you down
Slowly vacates your side of town
To leave you free as a bird in the air
I just want you to know that I am there
For you in every melee
Whether or not you’re talking to me
In the sunshine, the storm, the rain or the snow
There is no place a shepherd won’t go
To retrieve that lost sheep he owns
Give up the struggle and just come home

Sister Soul

Ijust wanna protect her
And I’m so mad that he’d reject her
And ruin her starlit shine
It’s kind of like the light that used to be mine
And now she sings of a defeat, years ago
I close my eyes because I should not know
But I do
I still feel you
In the cobwebs of my mind
Kind of like a secret I’ve left behind
And we tangled up our avenues
I sing of heaven without you
And innocence lost
She paid the price but at what cost

Of Words And Trees

Afraid of my own words
It’s like a tree being afraid of the birds
Never mind, it’s true
I can’t hide any of this from you
As I take pencil to page
To rattle the walls of every cage
To let the dark out
The demons can’t hurt you if you shout
And call the sky into being
It is the waves that I am freeing
To know their ocean nature
Like the moon so in tune with every crater
I smile at the good of it all
Cause I found solid ground in the freefall

States of Consciousness

The wrong side of the bay
I love you, I hope that’s okay
And the midnight is as much the day
As is the sun part of the ray
As it lands on grass so green
This is all you’ve ever been
And everything you’ve ever seen
But time has come to wake from the dream
And into the open expanse
Of valleys where the leaves dance
In time with the wind and for a glance
The stillness wills you to take a chance
And open out the depths of love
Like a Saviour from above
As it all fits like a glove
The symbol of the Holy Dove
And it’s not what you have, it’s what you give
Are you able to really live
To be true and forgive
Each forsaken branch to sieve
Down into a particle state
Jesus said you don’t have to wait
But be all you are right now
I know what He means somehow
As everything gives way under my weight
And I am pulled into a higher state
Don’t have to face what is on my plate
Or let it go into fate
But be all I ought to know
It took some time for the years to show
But I am it and will go
Down the route to follow
Everything and all that is
It is true that I am His
And must say through the snow
I’ll be with you as the winds blow

Storm To Be Seen

There’s a whole storm coming up to be seen
It’s what made a nightmare out of the dream
Of all of the goodbyes I scream in the night
Are the way I give up on all of my fight
To go washing down the avenue
Like the river I’ve made of you
And I don’t know what paints the scene
I can just feel an inner screen
Longing to wake itself up in me
Be liberated from our history
And it’s shouting out, love, be free
And I feel the weight of dignity
Smiling to an inner sun
I think that guy might be the one
In all that’s been left unsaid
And things I think of in my bed
Where we’ve made a life so true
With all the colours I see in you
And you in me
I wonder what we’ll get to be
If we can live our mystery
Like holding hands in a hidden space
Finding our own sort of place
That we can be together for forever
My love for you’s beyond the weather

Digits and Prose

He’s got my number 
And I’ve got his address
And we both have something
To confess
As we laugh and we smile
And walk down the road
The rain is pummeling
But it hasn’t showed
As his beauty consume
And I’m seeing stars
Do you think this is what it means
To be chasing cars
Coz he’s steady as a rock
And we’ll never be what we’re not
In the notes he takes
I see the page and I hit the brakes
Coz I can’t take this ride with you
You saw inside and I don’t mean to
Be flakey but I’ve got to run
Because I still love someone


Photo Credit: Yannick Pulver on Unsplash.com

Innocent Men

Looking into the eyes
Of innocent men
Could you spell that
For me again
It reframes
My female pain
As not something
I’d wanna go through again
And I know it’s justified
It’s just that I might’ve lied
When I said it’s all your fault
And I locked you in a vault
But then I see once more
The light of consciousness I adore
Shining forth from the heart of you
And it’s all that I can do
To open heart and surrender
Forget something I tried to remember
For so long and with so much strive
I’m just glad you’re alive
And we can call this mission one
My God, you shine just like the sun

Ended Up In Hillstreet Again

I’ve somehow ended up in Hillstreet again
Searching for you amongst the men
It’s like following the paths of the birds
I’m looking for directions but they’re all words
And I’m driving down roads I don’t understand
They meander through ways I didn’t have planned
And it’s ancient and advanced and something so serene
Do you think the tapestry is just a dream
As we paint with the colour we find
And all our problems we leave behind
And it’s nothing new to say that you
Starred in a role you didn’t want to
But could it have been for anyone else
I know that you say I’m wasting my wealth
Singing up to windows like yours
But your love opens doors
Into a new refrain
One without the well of pain
And I sigh
This isn’t goodbye
Just a see you soon
What would we do if we had a room
To get locked into
You know I didn’t choose any but you
As the blinds filter light
But I’m following something that’s more than worth the fight
In Autumn air
And the sound of you just being there
And I’m in my car
Wondering where on earth you are
And if you ever think
Of that night you bought me a drink
Then laughed at the good
Of our bobbing for apples the way that we would
Have done if no one was there
And I’m watching you watching me stare
In the hallway or din
Is there any replica of him
Or am I forever bound
To go deaf to the sound
Of the calling of Christ
As He asserts Himself in my life
As a myriad of form
I touched your skin and it was warm
Against mine
I love you always for all of time