***TRIGGER WARNING - Mental Health***

This is my first heavy post like this and I want to make sure that anyone who feels affected by it seeks the help they need - poems like this are brewing in me and I just feel the need to be open about this topic but want to make sure that my readers are safe at all times and know there are people there who they can turn to if they are in need. This poem was written stream of consciousness with all my love and I sincerely hope that if it touches you in any way it serves to make you feel supported and heard. All my love is with anyone who is struggling at this time. I have struggled with mental health myself and find that writing opens a well of stability within me. My hope is that you have an outlet yourself and that if you don’t poems like these could be cathartic and healing for you. Know always that there is a Love that will hold you through the darkest of times. There is a calling in me to speak from this Love to all of you about the topics that affect me. If you are going through a crisis at this time please do not be afraid to reach out to mental health professionals who will be able to be there for you and support you through hard times. Know always that you are never alone and that the whole weight of the Universe is here to support you and that your life is more valuable than you know. Written with all of my love, Laura. Xxx

Is it immoral to take your own life
Coz I have dreams of being his wife
But they were cut short by a sudden stop
And I sure miss him a lot
And I just ache across the plain
I wish I could see him again
But there’s the barrier of time and distance 
Created by my resistance
To what you were here to say
I hope you’re okay
As you live with her 
Coz there was danger in what we were 
And I don’t want to crack the glass
So I hope the two of you last
Though I wish it was me
Who could resolve destiny
And be all you need 
I know you still bleed 
Behind the cover
And you are my clandestine lover
And I was diagnosed with OCD
Then I came to terms with what was asked of me
And I turned to the Lord
He said; help me with the Holy Word
And an indent was made in your reflection 
And there is a collection
Outside the Church every week
But there are things we never dare to speak
And it’s like a scourge on our community 
And there is no immunity
You can build up to that disease
No matter what you believe 
The darkness comes to call
Knocking from the inside of the wall
And it turned round and smacked me with a lash
Like a front of hot air clash
With cold
And I hope we get old
In the years to come
Outgrow the pain of being young
And marriage was all I could see
When I thought of him and me 
But the buttress far
Couldn’t take away from what we are
And every star
Shines it’s own strength
I look at us and wonder where it went
And wish you well
I would brave every kind of hell
Just to see you again
You are the best of men