Tag: wonder

Out There

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My love hasn’t changed 
Though the atoms have rearranged
And come to form a celestial sphere
But vibrate when the glass clear
And wipe the window clean
Like it is some kind of dream
That I believe in or don’t
They tell me to leave it but I won’t 
Coz you are the summer weather I crave
Not the man I came here to save
Not an ocean to span
And my voice shakes but I speak because I can
And utter the syllables long on my tongue 
You’re not just a season of being young
But the epitome I’ve come to cherish
It’s okay if it’s too much to relish
In the break of dawn
A moment there and then it’s gone

Evolving Into

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I was something
And I could see
A new and different version of me
And it’s come to pass
That I have come to ace the class
Of transformation
Coz they flick the tv station
But the score
Is always I want more
Than what is
But I am His
And I found in life
A reflection of his beauty
In a man and it’s my duty
To explain that I
See through the body that die
Into the effortless supreme
I gasped and it woke the dream

Your Own

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You showed me the sky
It was your own shade of blue
And there is a timelessness 
That lives in you
And everyone you touch
Is a resonant hum 
It took me ten years
To see you’re the One
The One in All
The Jesus who stands
The love of my life
When I’m holding your hands
And they’re soft to the touch
And gentle and warm
Who’d ever have known
We’d have kicked up a storm
Like dust under feet
When the wind blows a tune
Something is echoing
Now you’re in the room

Man Of My Dreams

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Monika Luniak https://pin.it/53bM2WK
He’s gotta be cool and he’s gotta be sweet
And it’s gotta be fireworks the day that we meet
It’s gotta be sunshine, it’s gotta be rain
And it’s gotta be turmoil not seeing him again
And what if the person I describe is you
I wonder would you describe me too
If you could put pen to write out a list
Second guess what I dismissed
As only passing, temporary, soul
But it’s like making music at the Super Bowl 
There’s a crowd there that will cheer
And far away seems so near
When you are so close
Temporal as a Holy Ghost
To reach up and touch
The man I love so much

Salvation In The Stars

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Looking for salvation in the stars
It’s like trying to round some prison bars
As they, adjacent, keep a defense
Til you’re hands and knees in the present tense
And do I confess
My wilderness and impress
Some secret subtlety afar
Oh, the world, how near you are
When you just take a glance
At the vulnerable in my stance
And I wish away
Tomorrow another yesterday
Don’t you see
That you were the ocean to me
And the sea at night
Oh, how it glitters in the moonlight
To reflect your face
Now forever is without a trace
Gone from these hands
I’m on the shore just pacing sand
As you glide effortlessly along another terrain
Have all my past lives been in vain
To bring me to this
A pair of lips that death might kiss
Someday or will
The power of life to kill
All that it breathes air into
And consciousness is quintessentially you
So you can’t lose it
But did I choose it
This marching band
There’s nothing I have really planned
Coz all falls away
And what you leave til another day
Gets left behind
They say I am out of my mind
But I think they’re wrong
I’m too deep in it and that’s my song
Can I hold the tune
I did when you walked in the room
And my heart hammered against my chest
The depth of wisdom that I invest
In you to be all you claim
Now it’s been years and you’re just a name
I click into
Tell me did I ever reach you
Or was it all just empty talk
The way you hold yourself when you walk
Like you’ve been punched
Something hits you and I can feel the crunch
As you double over side to side
But hell if I know you’re still alive
And kicking me somewhere under the seat
Why did heaven have us meet
If it was just to part
And you are the king of my heart

Photo: https://pin.it/6Sji9R9

He Reaches Out To You

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Love, he reaches out to you
And, God, I don’t know what to do
But I move my feet
To the tune of his beat
And it’s not quite a dance
Coz it’s woken from the trance
And music don’t sound the same
But I vibrate to the holy name
Of the one who saved my life
Not once but more than I’d like
And I’ve been relegated in the extreme
But it’s only within the dream

Coastline

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Find your way back to me
Make future history 
And stories we can tell the grandchildren 
That gather round the hearth
And what you save for me in the dark
And you can tell her she’s welcome too
Or I am with her and you
It’s just I can’t write this off
And it’s not a sunk cost
But something I’d invest in
Even if it didn’t win
And there have been trees in the forest of me
Falling onto pine needle dignity
As they hold me against my will
And all of my senselessness spill
Into hilarity
I’m laughing at the thought of you and me 
On my bed in a chasm
And I love that she still has him
Coz they look so perfect together
And d’ya know it’s lovely weather
For a sky to break
And I’m counting every breath I take
Coz they’re numbered 
And have you ever wondered
Just what’s fueling your love affair
Don’t you feel me there
In lashes and guilt and opening doors
Are men too quick to call women whores 
For being connected to another dimension 
And this is just a logical extension
Of the need to be
Quintessentially free
Did I learn from my degree
That she
In effervescent tones
Sparkles when you’re all alone 
And diamonds can’t buy what’s given
Some people survive and call it living
And I gotta say
I can’t save this for another day
But anyway
Hit me up, if that’s okay?

As Far As We Go

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The year I took myself to task
Was the year that I thought to ask
You if you would be my friend
And the year of twenty one will never end 
But it’s filled with ennui 
Coz I lost what I gave for free
And all the time you were with her
I didn’t know that it stir
As you wake up to believe
More than wiping your eyes with your sleeve
And I got committed to a mental equation 
Adding up how I might hate him
But I can’t make it last or real
As they try to make me not feel 
Anything at all, a deadening tome
I thought you stood alone
But there was wind in your hair
I didn’t realise she was your air
As I breathed in all I could take
Til I’m the diamond you forsake
Hidden in the rough and tumble 
But my facade starts to crumble
As I let the truth sneak in
Would I settle for just part of him?

Fighting My Femininity

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I fight with my femininity
It evokes love
But I can’t tie myself
To any of the above
Only open my heart
For peace to be shared
Open my notebook
To say that I cared
And that I’m not
In this quiet, tight space
But dreaming of days 
When I touch your face
Telling you all 
You mean to me
Not closing the door
So you can be free
And I know that I have put out
More than I take back
And I have been hobbling 
Over what I lack
But the sight of you
Is like a comet true
And I’m shaking just thinking
Of what I would do
If you were mine
To have and to keep
To wake up beside
A good nights sleep
And you’re kind and you’re awesome
I’ve been keeping you away
I look down at my feet
Coz I don’t know what to say
And you tell me I’m lovely
And beautiful
He left me empty
Now I am full
Of a joy that’s brimming
Full of trust
Can I come in, baby
It’s a must
And you look at me
As if I defy
The life I’m leading
As some kind of lie
But I just wanna be
Myself again
A woman in
A world full of men
Telling me how 
I should contain
This heart of mine
That’s broken with pain
But shining with gold
As I repair
The parts of myself
That knows you are there
That knows there is kindness
And there is truth
More than monuments 
I’ve built to our youth
And nobody knows
Or can describe
The feeling of loving
Breath when you’re alive
And I’m haunted by loss
And the threat of death
Keep living days 
Full of regret 
Coz I can’t control
The passing of seasons
Or people with pride
And a bowl full of reasons
And is it insincere 
To proclaim my devotion
To the silence
In all the commotion
As I feel the movement
Of a pin drop
Signaling winter
Or the moment to stop
And take in an aside
Of all we’re meant to be
I didn’t know if you knew
So I’m letting you see

Flash Flood

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You’re running in my blood
You’re running in my veins
And it’s like the man said
That I am strange
Coz I just can’t be awful to make a point
I’m only messing, don’t knock yourself out of joint 
In trying to be normal and to fit in
I come and go but it’s always him
I return back to in the midnight
Where there’s no need to ask if you’re alright
Coz you are and the stars shine from your sky
We’re together forever so there’s no goodbye
Waiting in the wings of a terrible dawn
When you wake up and realise that it’s all gone
Like the boy I loved when I was seventeen
But the wind escaped from a terrible dream
The one I roll in like the sea
When the current is demolishing me
Til all and sundry is broken and beaten
Like you have you’re cake but it will remain uneaten
And I never got to hold his hand
But the sight of him sure was grand
Til the brutal tide that won’t be surpassed
Came at me til I was harassed
Trying to get on with half an act
It’s like it was fucking awful and I can’t go back
To where I was before it began
And you become an also ran
Til I’m knocking my head against the wall
Coz I can find no silence in it all
But the peace it came and kissed my face
When I was an abject disgrace
When nothing could save me from defeat
I was run down and knocked off my feet
And I try to get back up and walk
It’s like telling the wind it has to talk
When it can only whisper nothings on the breeze
Do you know the feeling when your heart starts to seize
And you’ve got nothing but ragged breath
Saying to yourself there’s no regret
But just one that I ever let you go
And another that I never let him know
The true depths of feeling that pumps a course
My circuitry and the remorse

Gleaming Diamond

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Do I really want you to come a little closer
You’re just like a ghost
With the flavors of nothing 
And what I love the most
I see you shy away and I avoid
Being one of the girls
You’re not one of the boys
But you dance 
Like Heaven has given you another chance
To be all you are
The wonderful bridge
Constellatory star 
That just shines
Like gleaming diamonds in gold mines
I pick one up
But it just reflects the look of you, love
And we’re one again
Outside the realm of women and men
Just to be what is
He holds my hand and I am his
To recalculate 
All that has me in a lowly state
Where do I walk
And is all my effulgence just mere talk
Do I live up to
The brigand that I saw in you
As you caught my hand
I catch my breath as you reprimand 
Me for my trauma of being too much
I back away but I also clutch
You to me
Can you love the whole sea
When it’s not yours or mine
I felt crushed watching About Time
And I could feel a lion roar 
Deep within me
Death the moment life begins me
As I sit up off the floor
What was that and what’s more
Who am I
How am I not to die
When this body walks I seem to move
But it’s just patterning on the groove
Of the effervescent 
I hate to be described as pleasant
Coz it’s so lukewarm
And I am nothing if not a storm
Brewing over the hill
Do you know the moment if you’re not still?

50 Year Stand

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We could have a fifty year stand
And I could live with holding your hand 
But I could never be bound to profess
That I’m anything more than this minidress
And what I’m meaning to confess
Is that I reach for you in my distress
But I don’t see forever in your eyes
Because, you know, everybody dies
And I lost him at seventeen
When I wasn’t even in the dream
Just walking back from lunch
Ignoring that petty hunch
That had you sidelines and sideways
I don’t care what anybody says
Anymore coz they’re all liars
And I’ve set one too many fires
Under who I’m meant to be
I’ve grown up but still don’t see
And the diagrams all refract
The way you can’t get people back
Once you’ve lost your hold on them 
If I could would I live it again?
Just to feel the same old pain
If you walk on grass do you curse the rain
That made it green and fresh
It’s been years but I don’t forget

Dancing With

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I’ve got the fear of missing out on stuff
And most of that is love
Coz they’ve all got stars in their eyes
And I’m full of existential why’s 
As Peter dances with me in the club
I may have kept the ticket stub 
As he laughs when I say hi
And I begin to think he’s superfly 
But it could never work coz it’s not the dream
And I’m holding out for what could’ve been
Don’t you think you’d know at first sight
And your smile is kryptonite 
And there’s nothing more to say
Did I adore the way
Your reflection keeps the style
And I’m down for a long while
And I don’t understand why you’re still on my mind
When I thought that had left nothing in kind
And is it wrong to profess my dues
When I’m walking my own shoes
And have the rhythm of soul
And a heart of fire that’s burning with coal
Do you think we could be something still?
Even if you forget I never will

39000 Feet

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We’re up here at 39000 feet
Where the cold is warm as the elements meet
And make a force of nature new
If you don’t know I’m talking about you
As somewhere we swim inside the depth
And the best thing about Now is what is unmet
By the forest in kind of trees and of beers
And I lost myself in the years and years
Trying to find what can’t be described
All the while knowing I’m still alive
Coz I feel this heart beat through my skin
But there’s a part of me that’s deeper within
Than any skin and bone can mend
And death is simply not the end
Just a continuum of undefended peace
Or a moment of great release
As all of the sidewalks lead into one
Trust in God and in the Son

A Winter In Summertime

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There was a winter in summertime
As I laid claim to all that’s mine
The showers awash with rain
Holding myself together amongst the pain
As she clicked her lips to all my flaws
But when the sun burns all the ice thaws
In the mystery of a silent barricade
The house I live in, the home I’ve made
Was all but naught to the blowing wind
When you grow up, do you know you’ve sinned
Or do you just grow out of that sort of thing
Dreaming of a sky or a diamond ring
To annunciate what’s inside
The Eternal to abide

Steal Away Home

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I think I would steal away home
To find the letters you wrote on stone
In tablet form with a stylus
The reams of literature can’t confine us
Coz we are a storm by the light of day
But in the night we are okay
As you put one finger on my pulse
And wait for the racing heart to lull
Into the birth of silent trust
The reams of gold that will not rust
Only gaze in steady charm
The love of God is safe from harm

Pictures Of You

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I just remember his eyes
I don’t know whether they’re green or blue
Except for that picture of you
That I saw on a screen miles away
Now you’re where I was that day
Somewhere in a big, big city
But lonely and that’s a pity
Coz we could be something, don’t you agree
But you only talk to a picture of me
And I ain’t making war
Coz, God knows, what for
And I don’t hate what you had to do
That you have someone walking with you
And it’ll never be what we were
But maybe it’s better and you stir
To match the moment of her
And she looks like she catches your glance
I bet she never asks you to dance
Coz you move like you’re in a trance
And I would take another chance
Out on the wind
Is it to have sinned
To want what isn’t yours to crave
A desire I try hard to save
From getting to the heart of me
And we’re apart but you see
I’ve got you buttoned on my shirt
It was never meant to hurt
But I can hear it in your voice
Do we have another choice?
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The full force of the machine hit me across the skull
And I’ve skin as thin as cotton wool
As I try to find the deep reverb
To silence noise with a word

Loved Up To The Stars

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Are we loved up to the stars
Sideways and we’re dodging cars
That try to chase us down the street
The glory of our cute meet
On a train or a bus
Or public transportation 
I always look out for you
When I’m at the station 
In case you come riding into town
I wanna make sure that I’m around
And they all have me down as a fool
As smart as I was in school
They have me thieving timbers
Crawling through the ashen cinders 
And I’m forever ago
To you
But I smile when you want me to
Just to flash that grin of yours
I’m sure the earth adores
Ever child of hers as much as I do you
The needle and thread are pulling through
To make a new tapestry 
I loved you so I set you free

Second Guess

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You’re in the past
But the feeling’s still present
I wonder if I could
Knock on your door guessing
Wondering 
If you’d let me in
And I would explain
Everything about him 
That it was momentary
A flash in the pan
But you are everything
That I am
And I’d pause and then say
Wait for you to reply
Hope we could be close 
Before we both die
Coz life is so brief
It’s barely a flicker
I ran after you
Your steps just got quicker
Til you slowed yourself down
To the sound of my voice
Say, I didn’t know
That there was a choice
And look at me 
In a sort of awe
I’m sorry I’m lovely
And kind of outlaw
And you take forever
Just to answer
Say, I took you for love 
Not a dancer 
And I beg you to listen
With the words that I say
It’s just I’ve never been heard
In quite that way
And the silence is deafening 
But so is the noise
And I’ve been all about men
And one of the boys
But you take time
To really know me
I give you space
As we walk so slowly 
Into a garden
That none suspect
I thought our love
And the whole thing was wrecked
But you say it’s not
And you press my pulse
Into my wrist
As the lightning dulls
The terrifying pain
Of being right here
And not knowing what
To say to you, my dear
But there is just an always
In between us it resides
And my heart’s the kind of thing
That simply abides
In the summer, in the winter
Trundling through the snow
I loved you so much
I let you go
But if you really
Want to be right here
Then I am waiting
For you, my dear
The doors unlocked
And you have a key
So no need to go
Second guessing me
No need to go drawing
A line in the sand
Just look into my eyes
And hold my hand
And feel my heart
Beating tremor
It’s just like you’ve
Found true love forever

Stillness – The Quiet Sound

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The trees just stand tall
They don’t go running around
And a leaf falls in silence
To land on the ground
And the age rolls on by me
It’s a calamitous affair
And I’m asked by my soul
To receive the prayer
That it is offering
Up to the sky
There is that that lives on
Even when we die
There is that that wakes
Even when we sleep
There’s no promise you can make
That it will not keep
And I’m walking the aisles
Of the ruin of me
Wondering if
The rain could be set free
As it pours in through
A hole in the roof
Living my life
Must be the proof
Of all that’s gone by
And all that’s yet to come
But if you look for this moment
You’ll find it is one
One with the dark
One with the dawn 
One within
That can never be gone
That keeps on rolling
The hills and the valleys
The no we can’t’s
And maybe we, shall we’s 
But in the end
It all comes down to this
Will you seize the moment
Or will you miss
It as it 
Goes passing by
I’m sorry, my love
But I had to try
To win you over
And take my chance
Now I move with the wind 
And watch the leaves dance
In a symphony 
Of quietude
The noise subsides
And you’re a pretty cool dude
Who keeps me there 
By a thread
I profess my love
You stay silent instead
And the roar of the ocean cannot drown out
The waves of me and my doubt
As I fail to see
What you’re asking for
I look at you
And I adore
Everything that is there to see
Could you picture you with me?

Diagrams

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I see diagrams unfold
When the splintered story’s told 
And Heaven can’t hold itself back
As I give up on attack
Just to hold light to the touch
The fabric of a dress I love so much
And it’s spread like a sea over the land
And I know you understand
Me when I just inflect
And say, baby, my head is wrecked
Could you make it better with a simple smile
I admired you a long while
As we just slow and converse
I’m sorry if I’m weak and you’re a little terse
As I put it all in verse
The days of darkness getting worse
But he shone like the sun into a season
Loved me deep without needing a reason
And I can feel the wind blow my hair
With the freedom of he being there
And he says, my love, it’s nothing at all
And for once I’m not talking to a wall
But open arms and a heart to match
Like olden days with roof of thatch
As we just settle into a rhythm
He’s looking for an answer, does he know it is him
As he plays a Beatles tune
I’m glad that you were in the room
Even if I was all alone
And you hit me up on my iphone
And I regale you with my tales
Though your courage never fails
I can feel you deep and true
In your hands my lands are new
And I don’t know what we’ll be
Coz we’re lacking a history
But the present moment just resounds
And your full of quiet sounds
As you muse and contemplate
What might have me in this state
But the day is born with new light
And, honey, I am alright
I’ve spent years in this snow
And I know you want to know
But there’s no place I cannot go
I speak the words extra slow
So you know what I’ve been meaning
Everyone seems to be dreaming
And I awoke one sudden morn
It was as though I’d been reborn
And everything was as it is
And my heart and soul is His
The one who struck me from the sky
Now the impermanence can never die
As the changeful is consonant 
And I don’t know what you want
Except to say I am okay
And you are my sunny day  
In the overcast I know
It just took some time for the love to show

Unfathomably Deep

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There was that time
I tried to drink you out
But my foundations were not shaken
And I couldn’t even doubt
That you were the one for me
Now I don’t know how you are
But I feel you cosmically
A white hot burning star
Somewhere in the avenues 
Or in the everglades 
I don’t mean to be funny
But where’d you get your shades
Coz you’re looking mighty fine
With your cool as hell stare
And I can’t apologize 
For what just wasn’t there
Only promise you that I
Love with the full of my soul
And when the waves cascade
It’s then I hear them roll
Calling out your name
Like an old riverbend 
Was I wrong or right
For ever having clicked send
And I just can’t bring myself 
To take back the day
When the moment faced my soul
And I said okay
Give in to all the longing
All the heated prose
If you’re looking for some words
Do you know just who you chose
Someone who could compose
Sonnets of your name
And if you’re wondering if I’ve changed 
Well I’m still the same
Still am party to
A little bit of wine
And everytime I’m asked
I’ll say that I am fine
Coz I don’t want to torch
This wooden fence I’ve grown
From the rubble of the woods
That once were seeds I’d sown 
Now they’re all a garden gate
And the forest that you see
Is uncharted and unknown
A pure mystery
So please do not go rambling
If you do not mean to stay
I’m made for forever
I’m just built that way
And can never give in 
To the stride of the day
Don’t worry ‘bout the love
It’s just the modern way
And I’m ancient and I’m grieving
And I’m all over the place
But I am strong and I’m willful
You don’t have to second guess my face
In the brooks and in the rivers
That are running wild
And there are some parts of me
That are still a child
Innocent and foolhardy
And so like a stone
Except for quiet company
I live my life alone
Far away from the auspices
Of who you’d think to ask
When I take a sip
I drink it from a flask
And keep up with all the weather
As it’s changing every hour 
I’m always sitting waiting
For that one thousand petalled flower
In the deep of time and weight
Slowly to succumb
I look at all the rocks
Amid the diamonds I’ve become
And wonder what a season
Would take in these parts
I never knew it till I answered
With the full of my heart

Ocean Of Peace

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Somewhere on the dark side of the moon
I see a friend and ask him if there’s room
For me to sit beside and smoke my pipe
He says that’s grand, shur you’re alright
And we sit there in the blazing heat
With the warmth of the sun heating our feet
Coz though you can’t see it from the earth
Not all of love is made to hurt
And sometimes the shine goes unseen
Like the wealth of weight from a nocturne dream
Drapes it’s heavy veil on us
But there’s something you can always trust
That what’s spherical must abide
And remind you of what’s inside 
As it revolves around a star
The black hole essence of what you are
The singularity at the beginning of time
The mystery that makes me rhyme
And find a beat, a steady flow
Coz I never know where these things will go
Just believe in what I’m given
Gifted with a will so driven
That I must remake the sky
With a million light years in my eye

Present Moment Movements

.Reading time 1 minute.
I’ve no interest in travel
But I’d move Heaven and Earth for you
I’d span the oceans near and wide
Just so we could be close to
The great divide that keeps us apart
The diamond in your soul
And you may have grown, but I woulda known
If your waves suddenly started to roll
If the tide had started to beat
A steady rap on my door
I gaze into distances far and away
Always hoping for a little bit more
And you were young and beautiful
Now you’re craggy and grey
You used to love me
Now you drag me each day
As I try to build fortresses 
To what was
There’s an army storming gates
At the lakes of because
And who are you when you look in the mirror
Do you dine with a shirt and tie
And could you state or equivocate
What’s become just a really big lie
And dawn comes each morning
To shelter the night
In the ages we part just to ignite
The paper I’ve been setting up
How could you look at me and not call it love

Days With Darragh

.Reading time 1 minute.
There were days with Darragh
When my point of view was decidedly narrow
He saw me like a girl, I saw him like a friend
It has been years though and it doesn’t end
As I still reflect on his heartbeat
When we danced with both our feet
And shine with all our might
I can’t ignore your candlelight
And your fire that just burn
It’s more than degrees we earn 
As we spend time into each other’s company
And I’m always thinking, what does he want of me
But he just smiles and looks in my eyes
I let go camouflage I keep to disguise
The darkness in the heart of my soul
But he just surfs the waves that I roll
And then laughs when he sees my car
Buys me a drink at the bar
And makes me smile, makes me laugh
And he does it all without me needing to ask
And I wonder does his fire sign match mine
As we dance to the rhythm of the rhyme
And he’s red as a burning flame
I’m surprised he even remembers my name
But his is etched upon my skin
I loved him so I let him in
Let him see the hesitate
And he just pulls me out of that state
And never ever makes me wait
But breaks apart into something new
I don’t know if you know who you are, do you?


Photo by Jonathan Cooper on Unsplash.com

Forever And A Day

.Reading time 2 minutes.
I’d wait for you forever
Forever and a day
Love you unconditional
Baby, come what may
And I know you’ve got your attitude 
I know you’ve got your pride
And I have a tendency 
To run away and hide
But I can see us in the morning
When the sun kisses the sky
Among the waves of clouds
And wondering the reason why
And I know you’ve got your love
I know you’ve got your heart
It’s just I don’t think that we
Should ever be apart
But shine like a diamond
In a twofold connect
I don’t think the earth
Has seen the best of us yet
Coz I am full of fire
And red vibrancy
You’re as blue as the ocean
And as deep as love can be
And together we make something
That could only free
I tried to push the point
Coz I don’t think that you see
And you call me revolutionary
A laid back rebel soul
I call you like the chasm
That is the waves to roll
And everything is scorching 
But it’s also pretty cool
I see you like the summer
We met after school
Just laughing on the bus
As we made our way back
I didn’t give you a reason
For you to hide what you lack
Coz everything is seen
In this closeness that we wear
We’re tangled up like Spiderman 
In the cobwebs of my hair
And it’s just a dream I’m having
Or it’s on the astral plane
But you come to call
Over and over again
And I can’t keep you out
From the warmth in my heart
I don’t know why I’d want to
But I think we’re gonna start
To make something as real
And as beautiful as true
I didn’t tell you at the time
But I’m madly in love with you

Syllables

.Reading time 1 minute.
She writes music that catches in your soul
As if all the waves have to do is roll 
And midnight comes before each dawn
So don’t lament what’s gone
Because it will come around again anew
You can’t miss what is destined for you
And I hope that’s true coz he’s all I see
What if he was never meant for me
I wonder and I pause and I flip through the prose
What if he is the one that fate chose
To hold my hand and be the One
I see him like he’s the Son
Of God in garden grass
And I wonder if all I had to do was ask
Would you maybe wanna be my guy
I know I’m quiet and I didn’t try
But do you think you could take a look
And read me like your favorite book
And it’s fine if you don’t know my name
I’m gonna love you all the same
And wish you the wealth of wisdom and heart
I never thought we’d be so long apart

Awesome

.Reading time 2 minutes.
Cheers to you Stephen O’ Brien
You made the days feel like they were flying
When I was stuck in a peculiar hell
And you were the one that I’d tell
Now I’m raising a glass to your sincere
Your beautiful and held dear
With your rugged ways and your intone
We’re just talking on a video phone
And I catch myself then laugh out loud
You are something to be proud
Of now the days are short
You’re something yourself I retort
As we’re held in this glance for a moment or two
There’s just something about you
I wonder if space and time
Would ever repaint your days as mine
And I know you could call this therapy
But you’ve got to know what you mean to me
As I throw asunder all the folds
And creases to be brave and bold
You can’t believe this is all I am
There’s more to me and I know you can
See beyond the apparent face
To the depths of profound Grace 
To the love that’s held between us both
I’d wear you like an overcoat
As you just laugh and crease your eyes
And I’ve got no time for goodbyes
Just the moment that’s held in a stare
I love you coz you were there
And made me feel like I was home
Instead of in a room all alone
I gotta know, you gotta see
What would the days be like if we
We’re to make this something else
I know I’m getting ahead of myself
But you’re magnificent and perfectly prose
And I’d walk down any of your roads
If it meant that I could catch your eye
You’re alright, man, it’s worth a try
.Reading time less than 1 minute.
Jeremy Thomas on Unsplash.com
I swim my way to the shore
Full of a heart to simply adore
And the stars sparkle diamonds over my head
I see the Universe from my bed

You Wanna Dance With Me?

.Reading time 1 minute.

All my family agree that you’re bad news
And have me paired up with a different pair of shoes
That never seem to walk the line surmised
Or pass the test when he’s been breathalysed
But he’s better and healthier from the outside
And all they want is a decent compromise
That’s so tempting just to fulfil
Even if it is against my will
Because your cocaine blues somehow conspire
To set my traitor’s heart afire
Send my pulse hammering in my veins
As I spit into your face and you leave tear stains
So wrong, so inconceivably wrong
That you make me feel as though I belong
With your violent aggression cloaked so shy
Into a look that only I can spy
And smile at because I know it means
That I’m the only one to burst your seams
And send you reeling universal
Into a cosmic hole of dispersal
As the midnight claims both our souls
I’d rather die by the number your dice rolls
Than live with the certainty that exists
When I survive on what my love resists
A truth and unfailingness to see
That though I hate it, you’re it for me.

Scealta na Laochra

.Reading time 3 minutes.

I dreamt the other night you sang to me in Irish because that is our native tongue
And the words were tripping out of your lips with every line you sung
And you were seated in a chair with that smig you used to have
And I thought when I looked at you I’d never wanted anything so bad
But it was only a Snapchat video on a Facebook screen
And when I checked the app account you had added me
Though God knows how you knew my name, some things are a mystery
And the light shone golden on your face, in a kitchen making history
As I revelled in repeat as social media is wont to do
It gave me access to another secret part of you
How lifelike and how real, how stolen from the sky
But I woke up in my room with only the memory of your eyes
As my mother called to me about what I need to do
I wish I could fall back asleep so I could be there with you
And even virtual reality inside an imagination
Is better than the reality of our silent situation
As we face off across the world with miles in between
I keep my feelings a secret and you don’t acknowledge me
But throw paper planes into the air to see where they will land
I always thought it would be you to revolutionise a band
And fling the hysterical out into the crowd
As they all scream for you while I read aloud
The stories on the edge of what you have longed to speak
Set to an electric guitar and a motherfucking beat
But now you wear a suit or casual sweater vests
While I pile on eyelinered black and live out what you suggest
But does that make me love you less or change the way I feel
I used to be self contained before you chose to steal
My ability to decide where my love resides
And I cannot control my heart as long as you’re alive
And I don’t see you ending anytime soon
As long as I have blood to pump I will belong to you
In your incandescent glory and innocent obliviousness
I’ll swear an oath of
fealty with the moon as my witness
In the darkness of tomorrow that’s living in tonight
Is aoibheann liom do gra, my love, I hope that is alright
Ta tu go hiontach, I bhfírinne, an bhfuil se ceart go leor
Más mian tú Dia fein, I couldn’t love you more
Even though you deleterious out all over me
Tús maith leath na hoibre, seo mar a bhí.

Soft Eyes and Open Heart

.Reading time 9 minutes.

Am I really this invisible to you
I am red like fire but you are a dark blue
And I really wish you were the one that got away
But you gave birth to a love that was made to stay
And I know that you’re obsessed with everything female
And you loved the feeling of losing your chainmail
But just cause you aggregate the sum total of causes
Doesn’t give you accuracy in deciphering pauses
You point out my shallows where you are deep
Sometimes the silence holds more than I know how to speak
And if you judge a fish by its tree climbing strength
Then you’ll never be aware of where the genius went
As you relegate yourself in my eyes
To an outside chance who hop scotches in lies
But the main conclusion that you assume
Doesn’t even come close to what I felt in that room
And you throw aggrandisements like silky spider thread
And it kills me to think of who you take to bed
I know that’s intrusive and I’m not a perfect saint
But I fill in the blanks of the picture you paint
To be so possessive and controlling of my heart
I never thought I’d be the one to make a mark
Or a fine hit, I will assassinate
But I already met you and now it is too late
To be crashed and burned at the hamstrings of your feet
I don’t think they get me, you know they call me sweet
And you’re the only one who really ever understood
That I have a dark side and am not wholly good
At least in this respect as you dangle the bait
I grit my teeth like you do when you make me wait
As the forest and the trees, they all shout your name
I guess that you are right, I am not the same
As I was years ago but you didn’t like
What I offered so I had to make something right
And readjust the sails on the ship that I’m steering
I’m sad you don’t like the things that you’re hearing
As I try my best but it’s falling short
And you tell me so with no remorse
But the burden falls solely into your hands
And you may not like it but you’re the guardian of these lands
In a country that is free, in a garden green
I’m not fooled by the multitudes of people you’ve been
As you promise sanity and a well balanced life
But you hide your truth behind the trenches of a wife
To blockade the arms that are hunting you down
It’s not the same since you left the town
As I wander and I weary where we used to be
And you cultivate the anchorage that keeps you at sea
When all in a moment the silence grabs us both
We are neither sun nor sand, the ocean nor the coast
And fallibility will reign on my parade
I guess I’m just startled by all you put in the shade
With your elegant light and glowing finesse
I seek you out to ease my distress
As you softly imbue your quiet refuge
With a peace I will happily drown in to prove
My loyalty to all you stand for
I’ll take all you have and then some more
The subtlety of your sincere divination
We were both supposed to be at that station
But you never came, no you never arrived
I don’t really know how I survived
The blow that hit me coming in from the west
And I asked God if this was some kind of test
That never seems to end because I never have you
I hope she makes up for what I could never do
Lie out in the openness of unhindered stars
What you had lined up for me were prison bars
Even if you don’t see it I am more than a girl
To frame the picture you take of this world
And to be dressed up for the let down, you see
I knew it would come eventually
When I couldn’t live up to what you’d idealised
I am human and hurt that everything dies
Even you and you especially so
I am not here to keep you from where you want to go
You ask it of me to be ball and chain
But the sacred feminine runs in my veins
To be lifted up and glorified
You are no the lesser because you have tried
To be a man who honours what’s whole
We’re all innocent when it comes to our soul
And laid bare and genuine when it really comes down
To someone we love to be around
And I can feel the longing you ache
The dreams that you enter are the ones I forsake
To divine will, how could one person be
The purpose of life in his mortality
Ever second guessing steps I failed to take
I was looking in your eyes when I felt you shake
And all the world collapsed out from under me
I feel like I am falling but you say I am free
And you may be right but I wouldn’t think so
Still anywhere with you I would be prepared to go
But you watched me from the sidelines like an experiment
And you would push the pulse to see where the blood went
And I know you are gentle and the fragile breaks
But I couldn’t read your mind or preempt my mistakes
That were red flagging my appearance in your mind
As you considered what it would take to leave behind
The penny you picked up dirty from the dust
I don’t know if you felt it when I leaned into the trust
That you inspired by your gentility
Others may have held back but I lacked ability
To contain what was rising from somewhere deep within
Anything that he asks I will give to him
But what I am you already are
And you can’t see yourself even if you try hard
Cause a knife can’t cut itself with its own blade
And I can’t undo the mess that I made
Revolving my inner voice as you supermassive rocket
You can’t apprehend the reason that makes something of it
And my optic nerve leads directly to my brain
And all I can think of is a particular train
And I know that you are bitter in your anxiety
But this is not one sided and you could have talked to me
A delectable flower in the field you passed
But you were blindsided and I didn’t think to ask
What was troubling you as you make your headway
To a goalpost that surpasses what transpired that day
And I wished I could have touched you in the rain
But I owed one to death and you savoured pain
So I give you your due and let it take me
Thank you for the darkness bequeathed infinitely
As I smile at the sadness in your goodbye
I think that you mean it but I don’t know why

The Dark

.Reading time less than 1 minute.
"Don't touch it"
Everyone seems to say
But I love the dark 
It is deep and endlessly long
It is peaceful and pure
In its nothingness

Estrellado

.Reading time 3 minutes.

I guess I’m just a psychopathic stray
And you pierce the veil til I go away
No mention of the charge you have run up
You find the place where you can make a cut
And if man is so fickle as that
And your love can change at the drop of a hat
Then I’m not so sure I want to be a part of
The crossword that you have called love
Cause I can’t figure out what it means
While you run along tripping sunbeams
I wonder why and where you’ve gone
Wish my feelings had not lasted this long
But you are only what I want to hold
An ethereal passing by as I fold
No more permanency than a lightning strike
Just cause it didn’t last didn’t mean you weren’t bright
But I can’t always be waiting for it to hit twice
It was from a distance you lit up my life
And though you may come by in a storm
You can’t dampen the spirit of a heart that is warm
So though I wish to forsake
It all for you cause you make the earth quake
I cannot ignore the fact
That you hurt me bad and you never came back
So sidle on down the road
I see your truck hasn’t slowed
And I will find a peace somewhere within
That you don’t own and you can’t unhinge
Though you may have never meant to trip
I fell hard for you and I was not equipped
For the long, slow, hard ride to my feet
I was not prepared for us to meet
And you are lovely and angelic there
But you can be all that some other where
And illuminate all that surrounds
I won’t be the place your electricity grounds
They say once bitten, then twice shy
What I’m trying to say is goodbye
We can’t always be a push and pull
A driving away and then too full
It’s enough to know that you exist
Somewhere in an atmosphere the stars have kissed
And if you ever do get the chance
Then I mean it when I say I hope you dance
And find whatever source makes your wheels go round
When it is the truth you’ll know the sound
I guess I just did not find it in you
I lost myself cause I wanted to
But a circle always spins back to the start
In the end you never had my heart
Cause it is wild, unbound and free
And you only ever wanted to capture me
But I was not meant to be caged
In a book you wrote as your feelings raged
I am ever still the way I am
I hope that you can understand

The Glorious

.Reading time 1 minute.

I want to be inspiring
Or beautiful
Or both
I don’t want to write the night
Anymore

Though I have written it well
As well as can be written
When darkness is your subject matter
As it turns to a golden sheen
In the morning light

But there is another way
Another turn of phrase
That lifts you up
To higher consciousness it seems
And rewards are your delight

And the marks that have been made
Filter away,
Pourously, as though they were never there
To the pure calm space within
That always holds its peace

I don’t want to write the world in vain
I want to write the glorious
Of undying rain
As it pours heavy from the sky
On me

Fire Brand

.Reading time 1 minute.

The eve of things yet to come
I’ve broken what you have undone
And shattered glass falls to a shell
You can’t silence rote learning hell
That paves a life that’s just a clock
I didn’t mean to let you unblock
But somehow in the clouded din
You saw through to who I am within
And all the pins clasping me together
Won’t withstand what I remember
When you stood me toe to toe
And looked at what you want you to know
Though it was against my will
The moment held us both so still
And burst into an intimacy
Like there was only you and me
On this whole earth, in this domain
I thought I understood your pain
As you gazed an eternal surrender
I sent the love returned to sender
So it was a double entendre
Outside of our depth and genre
In a place that no one sees
I adore what you have freed

Coming and Going

.Reading time 1 minute.

Basking in the glow of your eminent sunlight
You set my soul on fire
With your glow
That only could be indicative
Of a sun bound nuclear fusion
That sips my tea with a new brew infusion
As I decide whether to separate myself from you
From the mythical bounds of unreasonable closeness
That seems to direct my actions
With more authority than my brain is able
Is it safe?
Is it safe, I ask
And you reply
With a repeated question
That I cannot say no to
But take your hand
Amid the wilderness of beauty
Only nature can command

And now you look away and fall flat
And I should be satisfied with that
Because it’s all I asked
That you not be so attached
But now I only want you more
Amid the bounds of defeat
Of all
That is not mine in law
But always will remain
One with me in essence
And powerfully destructive
Of my individuality and sense of self
Like drowning under a wave
You can’t keep your head up

Not All It Seems

.Reading time 2 minutes.

Silence hangs in the air like a stifling curse
As I pray to the gods that it not get any worse
Cause this world it is full of chancers and cheats
But you are the reason that my heart beats
And all of the machinations of a powerful system
Convinces us we’re just the world in which we’re existing
And people will pay to have you give up on them
And then say that you’ve counselled them to live again
All the while they balance on a precipice spire
And beg that it not extend any higher
While their shadows they fall like feet on the earth
And know if they go down then it’s sure gonna hurt
So you make do with the concoctions
You use as insurance in the allotments
That you have obtained to grow your own farm
You forget about freedom, it’ll just do you harm
And I watch as they all spin round like clockwork
To the beat of a rhythms that is stop jerk
And automatic pilot their whole lives
With a few intercepts from one who survives
Or the beauty of love as it strikes them home
And just for a minute their minds are blown
And stutter and stop for infinitesimal seconds
Before they’re again drawn back into a world that reckons
That what can’t be controlled is a danger to life
It’s no wonder they take time to look at me twice
As the spellbound is broken beneath my gaze
And I’m not like a mouse who is stuck in a maze
And the mystery pulls me back into the unknown
I wonder when they will see that the match was thrown
Not lost by degrees but by design
By the shape of a hand much higher than mine
So you look at me and find a label to use
But all definition just means that you lose
Your natural discernment to right the wrong
To have nothing at all is where I belong

The Monumental Fire

.Reading time 4 minutes.

I guess I just got caught in a monumental fire
One that burns me up and never seems to tire
Of eroding me right down to my core
I look to you for help and you tell me I need more
And I guess that you were scared of what I had to offer
Cause it threatened all you had and you needed something softer
But sorry I am made of magnetic steel
And there is no tempering how I feel
Like an ocean, like the sea, like an iceberg standing lone
I always seem to be missing my quintessential home
And I just thought you had it cause when I fell into your arms
You quieted my thoughts and silenced my alarms
And I felt a strange sort of peace descend on my soul
Like I had found the one thing I depend on to be whole
And how you matched my heart with your delicately so
I would have given all I had if you didn’t have to go
And leave me to depart on some far flung trek
I would have walked out on a wire and risked my neck
But to hear you deny me like I never even existed
Took more strength than I owned to have resisted
Crying out for the other half of who I am
And praying that you would understand
But your gaze turned icy cold
And I could see my entitlement in the way I started to fold
And break like that and come apart at the seams
I had always believed in the reality of dreams
And that what was foretold would come to pass
And that one time only love could do nothing but last
But the chains encroached and wrapped around like vines
And I couldn’t speak when you declared you were not mine
But belonged to another and were bonded at the core
When you know it is impossible you only want it more
But I let the full weight of it break my wooden frame
As I conceded to myself I was in love with a name
That stood for a symbol that I was longing to be
What I loved about you is you accepted me
With no conditions and no rules, no, just as I am
So when I shattered the stone I thought you would understand
But it seems there’s only so much you can take
And I will never speak to you again for your own sake
So go live your own life full of happiness and wonder
And I’ll remember how you moved my earth with your rolling thunder
How you cascaded rain down the panes of my vision
And how you hit me in the heart ruthlessly and with precision
And how you struck me on the spot and made me to be
The living embodiment of my own destiny

Reborn

.Reading time 1 minute.

I can turn off the lights and pretend I don’t care
Like the pain of loss isn’t really there
Like I don’t feel in every movement I make
The power of what you chose to take
From me, off me when you left for the woods
And you told me softly it was for my own good
But how can I believe a liars clothes
When you once promised lines in acres of prose
And I never could really detach myself from you, hard as I might try
I’ll be betrothed eternal to you til I die
And when the after comes as I know for sure it will
The sun will be reborn and I will take my fill
And drink from the cup so pleasant on my lips
As you block out the moon in your beautiful eclipse
And if ever I had a wish it would be just for you
And I’m sorry I have to say, you aren’t wishing for me too

Celestial Light

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

You told me so many things
And the sad thing is I believed you
And now it’s all in rack and ruins
And I’m left to wonder
If any of it was true
But that kernel
That precious kernel
Still shines
As bright as ever
And radiates out
From the source
Of all love
And happiness
And joy
And shows me
Again and again
The wonder and splendour
Of you

Wonderment

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

61cfb50fac2c90725043dd5378250617Wonderment is the surprise
To be the deep inside your eyes
To be the bend at the edge of the river
To be the strength of a light giver
And somehow I just cannot escape
Superman with his red cape
As he goes flying into town
I listen for the empty sound
Of birds in trees at the end of days
I love you in so many ways
And it all comes to a close in the eclipse
You are the one I don’t have to miss

Photo Credit: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/206673070378676865/

Sway

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

The light goes out on your stair
And I wonder if you’re still there
Because it has been an eon and a half
Since ere I saw you smile
And I wonder
If you still wonder
About me
In the night
Or calm moments of the day
And think
And sway