Losing A Friend

Did I lose a friend when I let you go 
On the edge of UCD and I just want you to know
Who you are and what you mean to be
What you were and what you are to me
And you would drop your gaze and look away
I don't know why I couldn't make the time stay
Coz I wasn't sure I was girlfriend material
I'm half wild and ethereal
And I live to drop in and out
Of my own self doubt
And you were honest and true
And all heart and I loved you
But I didn't let you see
In case you would get attached to me
And I would have to split
But I was enchanted and that's what you're dealing with
As I'm leading you back to the club
Because I don't want anything to happen to you, my love
And I get Colin to go out and meet you there
I want you to know I care
But you stopped talking to me
At the airport like you just looked straight through me
As we'd wheel a case or carry a bag
And the days drag
Without you in my life
I know you probably have a wife
By now
But the part of me that I allow
You access to
Has not been retracted, you
Still hold that same spot
Somewhere between the dream of what I could be and what I am not
Because you were fire red and real
And I would steal
You away in a minute
But just don't think tradition is in it
If you still want to call on me
Just click hello and there I'll be

The Brigade And The Cavalry

She has to have noise
Like I have to have boys
Because when it gets too silent it blocks out the light
And she realises she is not alright
So she scrolls on her phone
Even though she is all alone
And somewhere in the forest of tears
She finds the reason for all these years
Spent in resistance to the cause
Spent in fury at a life on pause
And I can only dance
And hope that she gets a second chance
To be all she thinks she is
But one thing’s for sure is that I am His
And she worries the thread
Frays it as she lies in bed
For the trouble of what amounts
To the lies that she surmounts
In order to maintain a coherent frame
And I cannot even mention his name
Or it sets off a torrent of words
To make sure the truth goes unheard
And that holy bird
Learns to live on a silent wing
Because I gave him everything
And I’m not taking it back
Though they attack
Me from every front and place
For daring to love his face
When the pretence drop
And I am not
The words she uses to condense
Everything into the present tense
It’s humiliating
As if he’s just some guy I’m dating
On the sly
And the reason why
Is more than she’s ever known
She thinks she quenched it but the seeds that are sown
Only flourish in the darkest earth
And everything she uses to hurt
Me with
For being a “bitch”
In modern parlance
Is nothing, darlin’
I just brush it off
And whisper to him “all is not lost”

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One To Remember

It’s one to remember 
This night we’re losing our clothes
I know that you weren’t
The path I chose
But I still feel
So entwined
And I’ve a tendency
To call you mine
As you break out in laughter
It’s a sudden joy
I think I’ve fallen
In love with a boy
As he innocently regales
Me with tales
Of him at the pit
I didn’t know back then
But this is It
And I’ve found my shore
The holy one that I adore
And years pass
Like we’re flicking a canvas
Like you’re wearing shoes
And holding up like Atlas
And I know you’ve a woman
And I respect her claim
But I still love
The sound of your name
Against mine
And we’re just wasting time
Getting lost in love
And the Holy Spirit is a dove
To come down on me
Do you think we could be
Or is it just something
I have to let go
It’s not kosher, I know
And you’ve got so many flaws
And my winter never thaws
To break out into spring
But I would give you everything
If you don’t think to ask
I’ll let you in, at last

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Too Soon To Know

I was too soon to know
What I had let go
When I was young
And the bell rung
To signal class had begun
And it was all systems go
Business as usual so
Ms. Earley came into the class
How was I to know that day would break the cast
That had solidified around me
And it beckoned to ground me
Into the earth it knew
And I was far away from loving you
That day
But somehow, nothing would get in my way
And the ground fell apart as I crumbled
The ball was thrown and I fumbled
The past
How was I to know that day would last
And I felt the dark encroach
Around the subject that we broach
Perched on the edge of a prayer
It was the last moment “I” was there
As I began to sway and lose consciousness
It was as though I undress
In front of everyone
And the sun
That was about to shine
Was to say it had always been mine
In the subterfuge
And I thought that no dude
Could ever move me from that place
But that was until I saw his face
Masked in subtle tones
Now we’re staring at each other through our phones
As we don’t talk
But we walk
Every bloody mile of ground
Until we hear the sound
Of forever in a glance
Would you just shut up and dance
With me
And let my love set you free
You know it can
I knew it when you took my hand
And showed me a handshake that people forget
But I haven’t yet
Like I swore I would
Make good
On ever word I uttered
Is your bread buttered
On both sides
Because I am still alive
In your heart and soul
So put away your begging bowl
And look within
Lightning struck a second time with him

Pebbles In My Shoe

Darragh Connolly is the pebble in my shoe 
Coz I never admitted the truth to you
That you’re so fine you inspire the weather
And I’m running through fields of heather
That sing me to sleep with the sound of your name
I met you and I won’t be the same
And you saw me sweetly and you held me long
And your arms are so strong
As you point me out and then you laugh
Could you do me a favour I dare to ask
Would you just kiss me and set the scene
Coz I’ve painted us like we’re the dream
And I’m waiting for you to make the first move
But you hold it back like there’s a point to prove
And I smile and you burst open the sun
It shines the ten years that we’ve been young
In the growing, in the aging, in the getting old
You’re the Corey of my story that’s never been told
And I’d love to hold you again
But I can never seem to hang onto men
And I wonder would you
If I decided I wanted you to
Dance in the moonlight on the soft grass
You’re name is the question my heart likes to ask
When I’ve a moment silent in the dusk
You’ve always had a way with my trust
And faith that I put into your soul
I watched you through screens getting old
And the years may be kind to us both
But I still see us driving the coast
Down to the avenues I love the most
If you give me a letter I’d like to post
Then I’d send it to you in the morning
No more absent wonderforlorning
In the years we’ve spent away
Everything rests on what you have to say
As you keep silence like it is the cue
I must take in secret from you
Would you answer me down on one knee
If I said you’re the one I’d like to see
Every morning when I wake up
It’s so little we could scarce call it love
But there’s something in the moment that holds true
I think I’ll always be enchanted by you

Empress

I try so hard to be what you need 
But we both bleed
From sensitivity and wounds life inflicts
They say time heals but there’s something that sticks
And it may be that you
Just can’t bear to walk into
What walked out into the sky
And I wrestle with the fact that we all die
And that everything is empty air
But I know you were there
In the years and I look
You’re still an open book
And I love to read
Something in me was freed
To read between the lines
When will be our time
To triumph like the lion over the sea
It’s a crowd and they’re worshipping me
And you, the steady stone
Let me be with you alone
You’re a monument of time
And your poetry rhyme
When you put it into verse
You can be a little terse
With me but I see
Cracks of eternity
Shining like light through the clay
And I stay
Away so you can have your space
But I love your face
And the example you set
A love neither one of us forget
As we age
I get another page
And scribble down my truth
A shared youth
And trial by fire
But it only burns to take us higher
Or deeper you could say
A soulmate in the play
Of form
And the storm
Batters the coast
But somehow you still stand for what I love the most
Truth and integrity
A fierce abandon and wilful sincerity
Matched only by your deep stare
How is it to know we both are there
In the eternal zone
Just call me when you feel alone
Coz I am here
Though death may be ever near
As it threatens me
With the despair and identity
That will never be enough
To barricade against the love
That shines relentless
I think you may be Empress

Staring From The Sidelines

I stepped onto the bridge
The wood was creaky
And there’s something about that guy
That was a little bit freaky
But I like him anyway
I catch what he say
Across the thread of an internet fine
And I know it’s love for the longest time
As he flicks his hair
Flicks his eyes
Buries crevices
In my disguise
And there’s nothing more
Than to bang on your door
And tell you I’m out here waiting
I don’t even think of hating
You anymore
I simply adore
The sleep in your eye
And how you are with me when we both die
Across the refractions of time
On the thinnest of line
We are bound as One
And an unearthly Sun
Shines from your face
And I love this place
Now you are near
I hold you dear
And it’s crystal clear
That through the cobwebs and moss
All is not loss
Just a slowly burning candle
Did you think I was too much to handle?

Your Supernova

You supernova 
And I’ll pull ova
In my car
Pick you up at the bar
Coz you don’t drive
Are you still alive
Coz I never know
People are there
And then they go
And is it just my belief
That death could be blessed relief
Or some kind of saintly air
All I know is Heaven is there
When you break the sun like a smile
And I’m wondering all the while
“Will this thing end?”
But I’m your friend
In a come what may
I won’t give up on what you say
When you say it to me
I kiss the bird and I set him free

In Separate Spheres

The fire’s alight with every fuse that it burns 
And I just fall in love as the sun burns
On the axis of you
What the hell am I supposed to do
With all these feelings I’ve got
That I think time forgot
In the aching I feel
And was that time real
When we hopped a scotch
And I pulled into your parking lot
To pick you up
They say a hand to a glove
Is all that you need
But you made me bleed
On January 21st
I didn’t let on when it hurt
And you took up with her
I just watched without a word
And let on I didn’t care
You ran a hand through your hair
But I was there
And I still am
Guess that wasn’t part of your plan
To keep your guard dog lover throughout the years
I’d silence waves like I do your fears
Kiss you on the crest
And find the man that knows me best

My Captivity

I swore I would always be free
But I’m held captive with you
It’s closer we’re getting
To what pulls us through
And the thread is fine
And, Lord knows, I walk the line
Down another avenue
It may be just me and you
In our all and sundry
And it’s just another Monday
Kissing the stars
Or your lips behind prison bars
But I’ve got a key
Would you want to escape with me
In fields of gold
Or do you prefer your cell so cold
And he does a dance with his eyes
The perfect perforation in his disguise
“Would you love me true?”
I will of course, will you love me too
And he bats his eyelashes
Flips them up and down
And he has me already
In a white gown
But I’ve grown out of marriage
Of the dream I once had
Coz the more that I wanted it
The more I felt bad
And it’s silent for a beat
And the heat
Rises between us two
I leave but I come back to you
To regale the tale
Of the Infinite
I don’t know about you
But David might
Take a second glance
Give me love like it’s my last chance
To catch a star
I don’t think I’ll ever know what you are

Your Own

You showed me the sky
It was your own shade of blue
And there is a timelessness
That lives in you
And everyone you touch
Is a resonant hum
It took me ten years
To see you’re the One
The One in All
The Jesus who stands
The love of my life
When I’m holding your hands
And they’re soft to the touch
And gentle and warm
Who’d ever have known
We’d have kicked up a storm
Like dust under feet
When the wind blows a tune
Something is echoing
Now you’re in the room

If I Run You Just Catch Me

I tried to run away
To put it behind me
But I love you still
So, baby don't mind me 
I'm just using Oxygen
As I'm drinking the air
Fantasise a future
With you and me there
And I know you've got reasons
I know you've got time
There is an us
But I can't say you're mine
Coz you're free in your soul 
You can't be tied down 
And I've stopped looking rivers
Outside of time 
As I drive by your flat
For the thousandth time 
Does it matter that I
See the sublime
In all that we were 
Or maybe could be
Never thought the Present Moment
Would be history
But I'm letting you go
And you hold on tight
It's like losing your shadow
When you miss the light
That follows me round
And shines from within
Something says awesome
In the shape of him

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The Monumental

I’m exhausted fighting the tide
Oh what does it mean to be alive
Is it treading water or surfing the waves
Is it falling down or being brave
Coz I cannot seem to find a story
When you look at it really that doesn’t adore me
As I question every facet of a different hue
It’s who I am not what I didn’t do
Living on the brink of a well worn facade
Diving deep beyond feeling bad
And finding the Heaven life has in store
You think this is it then it’s a bit more
And I don’t draw diagrams for fun
I’m all architecture and you’re the one
As we build and we break
But we own each and every breath that we take
And every step that we walk
We must be integrity not mere talk
But the sun on the land
Or the good looking lad in a band
That caught my eye
Oh, I feel I could fly
But doubt my wings
It’s all hyperventilate and wondrous things
As he meets my stare
Holds himself like he’s really there
And I cannot ignore
The unconditional that I implore
Not to leave me
And you wouldn’t believe me
If I told you the truth
The monumental and my youth

The Suspense Novel

I feel the fear pulse inside
Oh, the terror of being alive
And I try to talk with my anxiety
It seems it’s getting the best of me
As I shiver and shake
Then the earth quake
Bringing monuments to the ground
With a tremulous sound
But the peace knows how to ache
Until I love it for its own sake
And the reason why seems to elude me
It’s like it has to prove me
Wrong or right
But I can’t sleep at night
For thinking of him
And the heart has to win
No matter how it seems to be
Could it mean the world to me
Swimming in oceans in between
And if this is just a dream
Then why does it hurt so much
And maybe I’m out of luck
To be adverse with an advanced decider
I never thought you would hide her
Away from seeing eyes
To be the moment love despise
In a sudden realization
I flip the switch and change the station
To get my mind off of you
But it only makes me want to
Clasp your hand in mine
And I’ve been alone all this time
Coz I can’t bear to think of another fella
I’ve never been the type to call you yella
But why did you not tell me how you feel
Why did you try to cut a deal
And hold it tight with skin and bone
But you look like I could make a home
With you where we were
And I don’t know what for
But I feel the need to profess
Everything I wouldn’t confess
Way back when
Could you ask me that question again?

Something Superb

There’s something superb on my window pane
And all of my fighting I have done in vain
Coz he’s waiting for me when I get home
And there’s nothing I ever have to do alone
And he’s sweet and innocent
Pausing and true
I let him fall into open arms and you
Are always there when I get back
There’s nothing in me that you lack
As you fail to find refuge in foreign seas
And get diagnosed with the dreamer’s disease
But it’s not make believe that he was there
And I found a diamond in true care

Beware (Explicit)

It’s fucking class
You don’t need to ask
She’s done it again, you say
But I knew it all along, okay
That she’s a colossus in my heart
She makes my pain into art
With a paintbrush in her hand
If she was here I’d tell her it’ll be grand
But she’s storming on another front
And the winter is bearing the brunt
And a bit of a ne’er do well
It’s the secret I never tell
That I’ve got this darkness too
The only thing that doesn’t reflect you
In the mirror of my mind
It’s the truth I left behind
As everyone just moves on
I’m focused always on what’s already gone
As the fade to grey comes back to sing
Aoibhínn told me I’ve a broken wing
And I couldn’t disagree
I told the doctor it wasn’t me
He needed to worry about
But he’s frayed the thread with doubt
And looks at me with apprehension
I should’ve told him it’s just the suspension
Of disbelief for a moment or two
No, the problem isn’t you
It’s me, at least presently or so
There are places I won’t go
But I’ve yet to explore
Everything I adore
Could you just hold the door
I’d ask you but you did before

Young and Mysterious

22 is a long way behind me
I’m just feeling nostalgic so don’t mind me
And the energy is bittersweet
Like the coast the ocean sweep
And I’ve grown up but I’m down
It’s been years since I’ve worn a classic gown
Back when I was in with the Commerce crowd
And I almost said your name aloud
When Isabelle asked if I
Had the hots for any guy
And what would have been if my tongue hadn’t tripped
Would you be the one I’m walking with
Coz I’m long past empty and far past subside
And I still remember your diamond eyes
As they gazed up at me from the edge of the bed
I was looking down at all they said
And you just on the side of your seat
Was it fate that made us meet
Coz I’m always feeling we’re supposed to be
I lean on you like a tree
So solid and secure
You look at me and I am pure
In my intent to do you well
How did I get so lost, I cannot tell
I just wanna know what it’d be like
To have a song where you’d grab the mic
And interject your own pause
There should be a hidden clause
That says when I get near to you
I’ll find a love that can do
No wrong
So I wrote you this song
Will you hear
Coz, my dear
I’m never far away
And I still love you, okay?

This Man of Mine

I just don’t know what to do
I don’t know, I just need you
To come back in on the breeze
And watch me fall to my knees
As I implore the sky
To let me have this man of a guy
To call my own
And true colours shown
Only paint the clouds a different hue
I came apart in the hands of you
As you just smile
And I walk a mile
In another’s shoes
To be happy and pay our dues
Could I give you a book to peruse
As you unintentionally confuse
Me with your ardent limbs
And, my God, the joy of him
To be together in this way
I don’t care what the people say
In their ancillary tones
I just remember the hold on my phone
As I screamed an I love you
And you just looked sad and blue
And everything is a forest free
Did you perceive the truth in me
Or was it just a moment passing by
Did I need to try
To make you see
Or did you just know me
In our absence of words
The silence is all that I’ve heard
In days gone by
I dunno, I had to try
To let you into just how I feel
But, I just, I cannot deal
With your ebullience
And is the tense
We’re in now just fear
All I hold, dear
Is the memory of us
And the dream of something to trust

Midnight Sky

Two stars passing in a midnight sky 
And I’m gonna love you until I die
And that may be many years hence
But you’re always in the present tense
Tracing constellations in an azure blue
Is the moon and sun in a room with you
And as far as I can make out
My trust in you bends the limits of doubt
Til we’re screaming yes at the end of an aisle
As I twirl your hair around my fingers and smile
At the chance made of fate
It’s you and I on our first date
So circumstance I can’t compute
How you and I could ever dilute
The complexity of an intensity strong
Holding our hands against the wrong
And you win me over with a simple song
I am beside you and we belong
In the halls of Love where they record names
The futility of errant flames
That spiral ever eternity
The timeless realm and now I see

Dancing With Diamonds

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Just another day of Diamonds
He laughs then takes my hand
And I can feel the wind in the way we’ve sinned
Saying that we’ll both be grand
He’s like the dew in the morning
Light to the touch
And I think that he knows
That I love him so much
As I avoid his stare
But I’m still all there
As he moves in close to my face
And there’s something I can’t replace
Like when we split the coin in Liverpool
And we’re acting like two kids in school
Laughing in all the wrong places
And he kind of crinkles his face
To let me know that he’s okay
That silence is in what I can’t say
And it’s been years
But it’s also right now
And he carries
The lightning somehow
In his pocket as he storms up a scene
And I swore those days were like a fucking dream
Young and wild and free as the air
There was no cost that we didn’t spare
As we paid with our hearts
Did we know that we’d part
Somewhere in the crystalline
But there was a moment dazzling was mine
In his effortless
And the kind of mind you can’t second guess
In his sincere
And the way he was just so near
As he smiles at me and holds my stare
I know he loved me because I was there
And tomorrow’s an avenue
And they past’s a monument
And I ran from the scene
Coz I can’t give you what you want
But do you think somewhere
Among all the tears
We could make up
The wasted years
And just hold hands
And lie in bed
You caught me with messy hair
And my face went red
But in the moment it’s okay
Because in your eyes
I’m whole, full of soul
Nothing to aggrandize
And you’re still there
Somewhere, somehow
Some kind of enchanted
That I’ll allow
As sparks fly
In the rhythm section
And I think you’ve got me down
Til I pull an inflection
But we’re so serene
And if we’re in this together then you’re a dream
In your fiery ways
You’re the kind of home that simply stays
Exactly where it’s always been
If I cut the lights could I be your queen
Coz you star my sky with little lights
And we make up after all our fights
As we just embrace
I loved you once now I’m in space
That you open for me
And I never knew wings til they set me free
And I’ve just got to express
That those days in that dress
Make me miss your beautiful warmth
The kind of hearth that mocks the storm
Would you be by my side
If I said let truth abide
And hold you close
I let you in, now you’re making a toast
As I video phone
The moment so when I’m alone
I can watch the replay
Do you know I love you more, okay?
And there have been pilgrimages
To foreign lands
But I’ll think of you
In the slipping sands
So much older now
But something is as it was somehow
Brimming full of angels that sing our song
It’s been more than a decade since you belong
And I meditate
On what exactly it means to be in that state
But I can’t repair
The feeling of you not being there
Til you speak aloud
Are you for real, I thought you were too proud
But you’re cutting the ribbon
And Lord, I forgive him
For never let me know in time
Do you think you could just be mine?

The Stars We Face

That he might be under the same sky
Thinking of me
Makes the ocean of waves
Roar with the sea
And I’ve got fire
And tenacity
But there are forests of green
I’ve yet to be
And he’s cool as a breeze
And warm as the air
Coming up from the Azores
Without a care
And what do you think
This planet would be
If it wasn’t populated
By humanity
Could you walk without fear
Roam without a care
I only know pride
Because he is there
And I only know windows
Coz I’ve looked so long
Into the spaces
Where he seems to be gone
And all of the avenues
All the winding paths
Just seem to keep leading me
The same way back
To his doorstep
At the edge of the woods
I can say that I’m here
This time for good
And the wind it howls
And pulls at my dress
But there’s something right here
I’ve got to confess
That I love you always
Unconditionally true
And I’m only ever wishing
The best for you
But it seems times have changed
And the world’s turned around
And maybe you’re listening
To my kind of sound
As it plays on the radio
Frequency waves
And there’s something about
A hero who saves
Me from the lies
With a single glance
We’re in the car park
But do you want to dance
Would you take my hand
Do I regret that tome
Where I wandered wilderness
All alone
Only to find
Your hand in mine
You are for always
Always for all time

Small Wonder

There are some things you cannot deny
Like a love that will never die
Like honesty and what is right within
You cracked my exoskeleton
Thin into a little strands
That broke apart into your hands
And smiling as you realised
You held it all in the tears you cried
That could never be wrong or crossing the line
I think you and I will be just fine
As we make a bloodless, solemn pact
That we will always come back
To this place we share and each other
I love you, darling, my soul brother
As we’re held together by more than thread
You show your fragility instead
Of the angry exterior wall
Of strength and impressions fall
As I realise that you are him
I’ll never have to look again

Star Smash

You’re a star smash like an infinite career
And you’re never getting out once you come inside my sphere
And collisions override the softer sides of us
You put your faith in me and I can feel your trust
So don’t you look away when words are falling from your lips
The moon gets in the way when its a solar eclipse
And the night comes in the day with a silky overlight
I knew it when I met you that I was doing something right
So crash and feel the dirt as it rises from the earth
I thought that it was pain but then love doesn’t hurt
So feel me in your soul like I feel you in my heart
We are one universe and we can never be apart

Daydreaming of You

If I could write you a poem what would I say
I love you forever like I love you today
And whatever water washes us down the line
I know in my heart we are for all time
You fill up my daydreams and I paint you unique
Releasing the things I’m longing to speak
You have a smile that crumples my soul
And a look in your eyes to show what you stole
We are so close though our bodies are far
We both share the moon and sit under a star
So when the wind rushes the hair off my face
I am wild horses and it’s you that I taste
But I come to you fragile and my head bowed low
Because you are more heaven than I know how to know
I look in your eyes and you see me right back
In know in this moment there’s nothing we lack

Trust

You are always home to me wherever we both go
And though we do not speak in words I know that you know
As sure as the stars blaze forth in galaxies afar
The dark interweaves our souls entwined to always what we are
And I know you have moved on and our lives are separate streams
But I meet you daily and nightly in my dreams
And everywhere’s an everglade with leaves all bursting forth
You taught me how to be myself and showed me what I’m worth
But I think in sidelines, somedays, I taught you too
Cause when you were on your own I was always there with you
In the brushing of the wind or the language that we speak
You are the destiny I didn’t know how to seek
But you found me and all in the open of the air
And in that moment looking through I saw you standing there
As you moved the earth with the weight of time and age
You are more than just a fantasy or wording on a page
And everyday’s an ocean and you’re not really gone
Cause you are inside my heart and have been for so long
So don’t cry bitter tears when you think of the past of us
We’ve always had a bond and that’s where I place my trust

The Lines of the Infinite

You walk the lines of the infinite as though it is child’s play
You talk to me in tones so sweet and then you look away
And how do I try to be anything but nice
Cause I have lost you more than once and I did so without a fight
So tell me once again, once more, about how you’re better off
And is it you or me or both who finds out that we’re lost
And though I ache with past regret and years that are gone by
I didn’t work up the nerve to talk to you or even try
Why are we in this quandary with our destinies dancing the line
Before I hung up the phone, before you said it was fine
Is there an immortal that is concealed that we can hang onto at least
As I to in the west am fire ablaze while you sundance in the east
And we are both stone strong examples of how love can do you wrong
How unconditionally is wrought in iron that is strong
And will not let you go at all, though lessons may be learned
I can feel the breath of wind moved when your head is turned