The door opened and the sun shone through
Now I'm blinded by all of you
In my psychois
I am precocious
As I make awakening look simple
Then suddenly hard
It's like It flicks a switch
And deals the final card
To make good on a promise true
And I trust in it too
Because it broke the fragile seam
And I realised that the dream
Can't cage the forest of my heart
So I make my pain make art, make art
And it's all a wonder in the deepest blue
An ocean that I saw in you
And it surged into
A tidal wave surge
And I craved to find the bird
That alighted on the tallest tree
And the flood just freed me
From shackles I didn't even know were there
And somehow It knows that care
Is only meant for a temporary incarnation
But your soul and its appellation
Is more universal than creation
Could ever contain
I came down as the softest rain
The door swings shut
On another adjacent dream
I run like wildfire
Or an untethered seam
That's freed from it's hold
And the scene is gold
As everything magnifies
Exactly what never dies
And I feel a heartbeat in my chest
Just thump thump and forget the rest
The tree beds down deep in my soul And I’m as icy as the North Pole On a summer evening It’s global warming but are you believing The stories they weave And it’s cotton wool I have up my sleeve No knife to stab you in the back No hatred to make an attack On what is perfect pure You loved me but you weren’t sure That you could trust the branch to bough But I’ll come close if you allow Me near your cistern heart The one that fills before it starts To empty out And the earth quakes with your doubt As you mean it all to me Could you be my long lost sea
Using money as a measurement for success All I get is lost in distress And unconsciousness As I cling to the wall Then the whole thing fall And I look at the rubble at my feet Why did God let us meet If he didn’t intend us to be together I scream in the morning air and the weather Utters no reply As dawn breaks over the seat where I lie And that was back in ten Number one on my list of men That I adore It’s like I found him on the shore I used to seek solace on But after I met you the whole thing was gone It burned up like a candle flame And all I have to hold is your name And I remember your hand so soft and cool That summer we met after school In the park And the field is green but the dark Is just around the corner and I Know what it is to be left out to dry Like washing on the line But don’t worry about it, it’s fine He looks deeply into my eyes And I’m momentarily without disguise Or words to play “I didn’t know you loved me that way” I stutter a response He’s not fooled The evening changed And the heat it cooled Down into a summer balm And all I feel is this unearthly calm Creeping over the edges of my perception The perfect kind of misdirection To make the minute hour long “I didn’t know you were that strong” And the wellspring bubbles to the surface “My God, aren’t you perfect” In the moment we hold each other I could never love another The way I love you I close my eyes and it’s just us two
I run but there’s no race that I win I walk away but I think of him Every single day Was there really no other way To handle things And my heart sings When the memory rises And my surprises To find him there And find he care Surpasses all my man made doubt And a life learned to live without Like holding back the air I need to breathe and I care About what happens to you I would love to reach out to You across the great divide But I fear the rebuff and I hide My secrets away so safe And I used to be a little waif In hunger with what she couldn’t live I hope that you forgive Me for my transgression Why does this feel like a confession When I’m at a loss as to what to say So I make something up by the way And feel all the penance that’s due I just want to be worthy of you But you won’t see me no more I knocked and the door Opened and closed in my face Did you know this used to be my place
I’m afraid that I’ll forget my youth When I get old Regale the years With stories told As if it is all past and gone Not ever abiding in a so long Back when the most painful thing Was coming in contact with a nettle sting Now I count the Ogham Spelling out: I’m all alone Though not really I’ve just got the feeling That these years May not be worth stealing As time marches on In fifty years will we all be gone Or will some disaster Some tsunami earthquake shake the rafters Or some nuclear threat As a leader somehow forgets That he’s human too And what you do to them you do to you And what about the climate change Soil to dust in a land that’s strange Not bursting green Like Sub Sahara could’ve been If we’d‘ve done things right Oh, it keeps me awake at night Just thinking Maybe I should be drinking Instead of facing our woes It’s humanity and anything goes
Driving through town and I think of Amanda She was into the emo scene And her hair was long Like a fucking queen And I try to emulate what I saw back then Seventeen 2.0 again And I wonder where he is If he has a wife and kids I used to check his deets Before I admitted utter defeat And the family life always seemed empty Like why would you when you’re good looking and twenty But when you’re thirty three and laying waste Everyone seems to say; make haste, make haste And I’m like a rock in the river, it just flows by And it might be a long time before I die And forty looks scary as hell Do you grow up or lose life as well Coz age hasn’t changed the core of peace And forgiveness might be the only release For what she did to me If you wake up are you free Or do you deal with encumbrance still Going through a dark night of the will
They’re gonna think I’m a bad person
I hear my ego boom
There’s only room for one
Of us in this room
And the heat is warm
I don’t have the heart for another storm
Only winter is coming
I feel the chill
Calls the leaves off the trees
That suddenly will
Fall to the floor
The pine soft carpet
If you look for Love
You’ll find that you are It
In the summer weather
As you walk amongst the heather
In purples and blue
All reflecting the shades of you
To let the seasons be
Is more than has ever been asked of me
Coz I fight the tide
That screams the moon means you’re alive
But a cyclical wind
Only ever blows more karma and sin
What is beyond
I ask the air and abscond
Into serenity
Be still and know the Peace of me
Watching the polarities Rise and fall Male and female Being brought to the boil As we push the boundary Of what we think we know But they’re just categories And we have to let them go As gender becomes A fluid concept And the powers that be Are sure to jump on it And tell us What we should understand Now that non binary Is in demand And you say conservative Or a liberal foe It’s all in the ball you throw With your good arm No need to sound the alarm On the adjacent feminist They don’t get how some things exist Except to say a right Is where the opposites ignite And I’m just sitting here In the crosshair I couldn’t fight The reason that was there
Running from the dark wolf in my closet That wasn’t a sin now was it Coz I’ve been recounting tales Since I was knee high And everything that lives seems to die And I don’t know why So I fight and I toil And I break and I boil Coz there are atrocities In the human endeavor And I’ve always been seduced By the promise of forever Coz it’s bulletproof And no matter how aloof She is I know There’s part of us that don’t let go In the years we grow Up and out And our self doubt In a mountain aware I love the feeling of you being there
Is your country just a concept Something you play with Have you grown up Or are you still being a d*** Coz I cannot stand in silence As the pillars burn Wait for someone else To steady the axis turn And storms are breaking out Like they said they would I read between the lines Of a Book that is Good But you seek to condemn What is merely knowing I look out the window It’s April and it’s snowing As the ice melts And the Gulf Stream redirects I listen to Greta And I wonder what’s next In this reverberate That is slowly brewing The people in charge Don’t know what they’re doing Or maybe they do (In that case it’s worse) You order a Starbucks But I sense a hearse Somewhere on the horizon For the human race There’s no telling the atrocities That maybe we will face If something doesn’t change On the political scene I woke up from my nightmare And it was just a dream
Can psychosis be precocious Or is it just kundalini Is it love or does it just demean me Like the woman said on the tv I’m four years old and I cut my knee I still have the scar At 64 will that be what you are Just another favor of my youth Oh, time can be such a brute It offers you the sky But with a catch, you die In the end or before your time I’m hesitant so I rhyme To make sense of things Meaning out of broken wings And I was in a tight enclosure Thought I’d die from exposure To the sun Coz there’s this light shining from everyone And the man passed my bed I thought I’d pass out instead Coz I was just riding the vibe Living (coz I am alive) And he thought it was the bathroom glare There were no locks in there And they would bang on the door And say; “just doing the check” And I’m just some ship you wreck With your foreign shore Why the hell do I want more Instead of less It’s like some sort of undress When my soul is bare And you found the thread that started the tear I got in your head and wound up in there Where they parcel the joy But I exchange it for a boy I just found by the side of the road I said to leave down the load Even just for a moment, in my presence And I could feel his essence Start to fly I hope I don’t die Before I see him again And I break my rule on men
You sit in silence, you hear the sound
Of doom now that it’s all around
And I swear I’m a first class citizen
So don’t pity them
Those who ask to see you cry
Because they know everyone die
And they’re trying to put off the date
But why let it lie in wait
I stood up in my two boots
And issued a challenge to my roots
And I grow into a tree
Stuck in the same spot, you see
And the vibration gives off waves
Are you the hero who always saves
Like Superman but in his Smallville years
Don’t think I didn’t see the tears
You cried in secret
I made a promise and I keep it
Every day, I said I won’t forget
And you challenge me but I haven’t yet
I was hiding in the bush
When I said there was no rush
And you were in the long grass
When you worked up the nerve to ask
Me out on a date
You call it logistics, I call it fate
Coz what was held between us both
That evening on the coast
Of the shore that we both know
I love him so I let it flow
Do I break the lid on categorical pain That seems to be as seasonal as rain And some people walk through a waterfall But they don’t seem to get wet at all And I climbed up mountains and I ran down valleys Befriended enemies and demonized allies But it never got me away From what I quintessentially say And as a baby I cried a lot But what was it that time forgot My first day of school Or when that girl broke the golden rule Watched my reflection in another’s eyes Or felt the pain when somebody dies Like my skin is being ripped from my bones Or the silence when I’m all alone Feels so much like peace When the noise cease And you can’t erase the childhood you own The good, the bad, before the iPhone That we didn’t post Or the narcissism when that person ghost Me over something I didn’t say So I let her walk away Took it out on a guy Who was the answer and the reason why The stars shone like diamonds in his eyes He suddenly lit up the night skies And the river runs deep and true I forgot about loss the moment that you Held my hand, they were all asleep And is it just like a trinket I keep Like so many others And the cloud smothers Me with its love Though I still look above For a being I can’t find I didn’t really go out of my mind I just had to get away And what people say Claws at me But the thaw reaches deep and sets me free From the aching of time A moment, nothing, and then It was mine
The loss means taking a hit
You think it means nothing but I feel every bit
Of pain you inflict
And I can call you a dick
But it doesn’t change the feeling inside
All I do is hide
It from prying eyes
But there’s a time when the disguise
Is a weight to bear
And I tie up my hair
Because it’s too long
And your song
Still rings in my ears
Throughout the years
Of uncried tears
And I’m just sitting in my car at the Mall
Thinking of the time you called me pal
And I can’t get back that day
And it’s in everything you Say
That we can’t hold ourselves back from the bridge
That holds us over the river
Do I forgive her
For the darkness that she opened
Like a Pandora’s box
But something undid the locks
And I can credit her with something she did not
Know she was doing
And all these dreams I’m pursuing
Are just ways I escape
From Superman’s red cape
As it tries to cover me
And tell me I’m free
But I’m sad and I’m weak
I remember days I couldn’t speak
For want of crying
Why is everyone dying
Slowly, then all at once
Kinda like how you fall in love
The sun is shining The leaves are green And I thank you for All that you have been In the midnight stars Or ocean blues I see you in Sunset hues And when the dawn Comes for the day I thank you for What's gone away And what has risen In its place I'm home again In open space
I think you are beautiful, I think you're a star You really don't know how lovely you are And I'd love to look at you and see you within Your soul forms a shape and its constellating And your eyes they are diamonds that shine from your core I'd love to love you and then a little bit more And your face draws my gaze but I don't want to stare All I know is that I know you are there And you don't fade away and you do not flinch In the years that have passed you have not moved an inch And we may be old and weary on the bone But I know in your presence I am not alone And I wish I could spend some time by your side Kiss the ground that you walk because you walk alive Shrink the violets to colour the room Thank you for coming not a minute too soon
Saving orcas down by the pond And you didn't know but I waited there til you were gone And you'll never see But I wanted to ask if you would marry me With your poetic stare You captivate people who aren't even there And I missed the day you filmed with your latest band And laughed out loud and said it'll be grand Cause you've got that mysticism Carving a river with the blades of a prism And bending lines of truth like light through the water I was afraid to be such a daughter Because you are like no one else And your hand magnetises atoms the molecules felt As you hold me close Not with arms but a holy ghost And you be company In the darkest night when guns ignite you sat next to me In midnight blues That turn into mornings that can't handle you Cause you are so delicately fine And I'm afraid I will crush in the vice of my love what I want to be mine But you are not for the taking You've got your own soul mixed with the rock and roll of the path you are making You beat your own track And I fear I will never cross your piercing endeavour on my way back Now you've got a success life And I'm just a drifter who wonders if you missed her cause you said I was nice I guess I never felt enough To fill the chasm or the hole in the depths of your soul with a glass bottle love You are magic beams When I wonder if this earth is all that I'm worth you speak to my dreams I wish I was like you So fearlessly true And unafraid Yes I confess, you marked the spot Where the Last Airbender won't fail to remember what you thought she forgot I hold a star for you And I plot the chart of my constellation heart every night that comes through Stay forestry amid the plain I cracked the stone and I let the rain
Siena’s tried cocaine I tried to numb the pain With all the alcohol But I’m just throwing bricks at the wall Hoping that they stick Don’t be a dick About it Wasn’t I right to doubt it Now I see you in her arms And none of your charms Can weasel your way back to me Just take that jack to the wheel and see I’m not for the changing And all the flowers fading Don’t mean that summer’s gone Another year and this song Will be played What you say Don’t mean a thing And another ring To hold my finger tethered to your soul And the waves don’t crash to your rock and roll Anymore You see that door It opens from the inside out And my mouth Is not somewhere you find yourself I am no Christmas elf To deliver parcels to your tree I just want you to be free with me And let it go I followed you just so you know
I’m really enjoying my time with Amy It’s like peace from the demons that slay me And we were friends years before Nearly twenty though it seems like more Some kind of teenage scene But after I woke the dream Up with a sudden shake Now it’s in every breath I take The loveliness and the confession It’s in the water and the succession Is a notion that I can’t bear to speak The ocean within me makes me weak And subject to the will Of the Divine that lives to kill Each and every one of us Look at me like broken trust Do you love the water I’m sick and tired of being the daughter Of the waves they come Don’t you wish you had a son To raise on high Now I am lost in the saying goodbye Ten thousand times And it’s just a pity my sadness rhymes
Welcome to the broken girls club Admission is free But it will cost you more Than you ever thought it could be And is it just an excuse that we get to use To say we can’t live up to the point you prove With pen on paper And the people who hate her Cutting like incisors Labeled as survivors When it’s just a midnight rush That is tender to the touch That spirals out into infinity Are you listening to me At all And I hit a wall Or bedrock As you claim to be what I am not
The curbs of death Mark the pavements of my mind And I’m stepping on cracks And what I left behind Coz no one’s exempt I dunno where it all went The love and the fever Do you think that you could just believe her When she shines her light And everything will be alright They are not just grey platitudes of wishes That flit across your mind as you’re washing the dishes And a sudden plate falls from your grasp Ceramic but it shatters like glass All over the hardwood floor Or tiled with patterns you adore And there’s a mess Like a man and woman in undress Fixing pieces together But the target moved and now the weather Is spilling snow Oh, all that you did not know When you were young Was I always this highly strung And a friend permits Me to call it quits On anxious furore Who are they after, who was I before Indeed, was there ever a pre Or is it just me Who clatters the makings of another dawn Something whispers; “they’re not gone”
The hate boils like oil in my throat A corrosive on the metal you float When you send it out to sea Don’t count on it if you rely on me Coz man I am no steam train But I swear if you use that phrase again I might just pop my cork The road less travelled and the fork Is driving me half insane Did you just use my name To describe a certain state of mind But it’s the world I leave behind When I step out on the bridge It’s like a Rocky Mountain ridge As I traverse these perilous seas That would have anyone on their knees But I am not designed to please Only be truthful and real Do you know what you tried to steal?
Stray I follow
And her words are hollow
Like the rings round her eyes
Everything lives and dies
And she can't shake the spectre
That hides in the window
So she finds love
But it isn't in him though
And the monsters don't drag
Her out of the bed
In the morning
Do I wreck your head
Or can you contain what I say
I like you, is that okay
But I don't agree with all you do
Or how you justify it to you too
And I'm down with all of the vibes
You emulate
And you call my bluff on fate
But something weaves
Its way in and out of thread
I choose myself instead
Of the same damn old fight
Burning in the firelight
And it's something serene
Do I really crack the dream
Open like an egg on the pan
Does anyone know who I am
Coz I think he did
But then I hid
And he bought the lie
But I had to try
To tell the truth
But I'm just selling my youth
And auctioning it to the highest bidder
And the thoughts in my own head make me shiver
With the terror of movement going
And now the wind is snowing
In the middle of spring
Did I really give up everything
Just to get to New York
The road bends just beyond the fork
And I can't choose
Based on what I've left to lose
I must be pulled though
And it's the sight of you
That's driving me on
True Love isn't gone
The sound of defeat as he chooses another lady And I dunno but I think that she hates me For intruding on their sacred space But he was a drug I loved to taste And the hit was high And it’s so hard to say goodbye Like it’s a final sort of end Or worse maybe we’re still friends And he could call me pal But I’m not a second best sort of gal I’d rather cut my losses and run Find something else that shines the sun And who knows, maybe it’s not a man Maybe there’s no limit to what I can Do It’s just not you And I turn on the radio and it’s a Sony Listening to that guy that’s lonely And maybe I’ll meet him in Blue Note Give him letters that he can quote Like before When he beat a path to my door Only for me to fly And the year the whole world threatened to die In a storming cavalcade Is it a fate we can evade Or is it an absolute rest We get the day before the test
Stuck in ‘08 It was my date with fate As it led me to your door Did you want me more More than I can attest And we’re both fully dressed But I feel your eyes rake over me Like we’re naked with destiny Just us and the come what may And you fill up the gaps in what I cannot say But it’s subterfuge and we’re resting in hiding But there’s something of love that is all abiding Now you’re sharing your soul with someone else With skin so thin you could make a heart melt With the fire that burns off you It seared a part of me too And I can’t change the fact of you I’m not the same and neither are you But we both kinda are Like the atoms forged in a star Or the matter that make time and space Bend the equivalent of the human race To the tune of light refract I never said no but I still want you back Standing outside my window It’s true there were days that I looked at him, though And I cannot deny my feelings were real With the depth of the red that he deal An ace of hearts And mine almost starts To beat double time He was the essence of fine As he’d crack a smile in my direction Like he’s open to cards if I make selection And he lives just across the hall And he kinda caught the ball When I threw it at him Is it a decision I cannot win Coz I love them all The truth in my own freefall
Letting go of what he did to me Letting go of what she said Letting go of the nightmares That haunt me troubled in bed Coz I’m living untethered I’m a wildebeest at heart And all I seem to know how to do Is make my pain into art And I paint my own canvas I love the glorious white But the colours of rainbow Make the fire in me ignite And I throw in some earphones It’s punk rock and emo lite I nod to the folks you asked If I was alright And I’ve got fury Burning a candle Maybe I’m just too hot to handle But I’m an Aries and my planet Mars Rules the conduct in the passing of stars And you’ll never be able to touch What is beyond your reach I didn’t come here for students I’m not one who has to teach To live my own compass point It’s been years since the Love anoint Me with its holy Chrism I try to get away but it seems the answer is Him And He brushes my hair out of my face Looks down from Heaven and gives me a taste Of what it must be like to live in the realm Where God is a friend and Truth is at the helm In the midnight of another sorrow I get by on daydreams and the light I borrow From the sun that gives me life Seems the setting shade gives you twice The morning on replay It’s always bright at the break of day
Muddy shoes walk all over my floor As I proclaim it’s a man that I adore And it could be Christ the King Or the boy with a broken wing All I know is that the stars announce The girl I was, the one that you denounce As I place one foot in front of another Never knew what it was like to have a brother Who watches my back Just a girl and the attack Was launched on me Fifteen years and I’m still not free Of what she inflicted And don’t worry, you haven’t dicked it It just I carry the scar that hurts I blame you for it and what’s worse Is that I make myself suffer for what never was I don’t know gravity because When I was brought down to earth I was in open space and the dirt Is evidence on my coat That I met a Holy Ghost
You showed me the sky It was your own shade of blue And there is a timelessness That lives in you And everyone you touch Is a resonant hum It took me ten years To see you’re the One The One in All The Jesus who stands The love of my life When I’m holding your hands And they’re soft to the touch And gentle and warm Who’d ever have known We’d have kicked up a storm Like dust under feet When the wind blows a tune Something is echoing Now you’re in the room
I had feelings for you back in the day But then I just used you to explain Darragh away And he’s the secret that I’ve been keeping The magnificent dragon quietly sleeping In the recesses of my soul Is there a together in the growing old Where we can both warm our hands by the hearth Find our own way in the dark As he speaks to me Weaving a thread on the tapestry To paint the picture of us And we’ve always had trust Why did you hide your face So I couldn’t keep you in place Where you were Let you run off with an adjacent her In the winter of my life Moored in strife As the cavalry came To take all but my name from me Then suddenly starshot in the oblivion I saw a remnant of what I’d been living in A moment of truth And I can’t claim the auspices of youth Anymore Is that you at my door? Well, for God’s sake come in! You’ll catch your death if you’re waiting for him
Am I about to dive into the rabbithole scene I haven’t felt love like this since it was just a dream And his words are fuckin’ insane But I still remember his name And the way his hair curls around in locks The way he walks a palace that time forgot And shows me in mornings what’s up for the day At least that’s what she said when I asked her, okay? And you know in the quiet what’s left to be said You’re always making your home where you lay your head And find something honest and real and true That was just with them and now it’s with you In the maybes you ache as you shout a refrain I love the hope of you and I walked through the rain To be the storm centre, the very eye Take care of yourself and make sure you don’t die At least for another fifty or so years Make art out of pain when the canvas is tears And look up to the heavens when the sky clears I drink one to you when I’m having my beers I’ll laugh out loud and simply guffaw When I’m running from stares and the vacancy law That seems to hold court and company I don’t know about you but I’m down on one knee Professing my love to the moon and stars Do you remember the days when it was prison bars And nothing meant anything to anyone you know Now you wave at me as I watch you go With the train that has taken you from the station I guess congrats are in order for the celebration Of all you have earned that is duly yours And I know you could say that this is all words When I never make it out of the snowstorm that snaps Full of whodunnits and who gives a craps And at least if I’m honest I’ll say this to you You gave perfect a spin now the ancient is new Now the midnight is dawn and all the renew You cut fabric in strips out of jeans that are blue So you’ve something to wear when the darkness escapes And teach me the truth that not all heroes wear capes
I spent my youth fearing old age Now I’m finally flipping the page And finding out that the aforementioned Is really not in this dimension Because I extend out Far beyond the realms of doubt To the furnace roar and the circumstance Do you know the electrons dance In perpetual motion And nothing can replace devotion In the furthering of things And a million rings Cannot make me replace The love that I came here to taste And just drink in It wasn’t just with him But everyone Everyone the immaculate Son Of Destiny Do you think he thinks of me With his hand on the trigger A rifle to fire But love’s not down low But somewhere higher To take in the vista And one can only say “I missed ya” If you believe the lie People we love cannot die But fly On immutable wings And everything in creation sings Of its unborn nature My love, I could never hate ya
In a place where the cold seems waiting Left in love, don’t give way to hating As the scenery revolve And everything is a problem to solve As you, ashen faced, stare at me And I avoid your gaze coz I know we’ll be Always an eternity Forever lapping like the sea Against the shore Could you wish for more You open up like a closed door
The Jesus in my soul Is a story I haven’t told Coz He is always there A place of true care And I fell in love with men Hoping I would see Him again In moments silent and true I saw reflections in the eyes of you And you stand tall and look like a hero And I’m on my way to absolute zero And I dig the earth Disregard the waves of hurt In ages pulling hence The present moment’s never in the past tense And He is a forest of trees All you have to do is believe And trust when you’re letting go That he will catch you, you know
The myth of myself I rivet the dawn And make preparations For when it is all gone Coz it won’t last forever This person that I’ve made You only know the sun When you’re standing in the shade You only know the midnight Because come the dawn You wake up to the instant That you truly belong
I am the place I’m looking to get And it’s just an illusion to say I’m not there yet Coz I stand in my own pair of boots Anchored like tree who has roots Deep in the soil drawing up Water and nutrients like they are love And lead to me flourishing with leaves of green Nothing isn’t all that it may seem And I’m used like ink in the nib of a pen I’ll just jot down, can I write it again And Now comes to pass as always is The magic is that I am His
It’s a beautiful Saturday evening Crisp and clean Like you’d be playing football On our field of dreams And I couldn’t reconcile The golden green mile I had to walk Through valleys of talk And ideals ripped asunder Days when my number Was up But love Pushed me through the needle eye Coz it’s not my time to die At least not just yet But I don’t forget Our moment out of time And the instant you were mine I held a holy hand And it was like sand Slipping through my fingers Where are the bringers Of the doom I seem to sense And the forest is dense But I’m all good Pine cone bed in the middle of the wood
The life I swore I wouldn’t live in I just crawled back towards the sin And made a stick house out of lollipop sticks Chew gum and hope that something sticks Coz I’m out in the open when I’m with you I shed my clothes coz you asked me to And in my defense I have none I gave it up for God’s Son And I’m humming mobile as I walk Wonder if I’m just all talk Or does the substance of me Have something to give you for free But you’re all tied up with her Denying everything we ever were And I’m the last one in the club (But I say no to the drug) You just offer up But I can’t call this love Not when you bargain a chip Then say I’m the one with it The last one at the table Look at me if you’re able Coz you drop your eyes Like there is no disguise That could ever keep us apart And I must admit I am all heart When it’s beating for you Don’t walk away just coz I asked you to I’m just scared that’s all (And you are really tall) Could you maybe hold my hand For a moment’s change before the sand Runs out of the hourglass Did I ever tell you you are class!
I’ve never spoken of my feelings for you And I don’t know why And I’m always scared You’re gonna die Coz I hold you so dear But you’re never near And I don’t think you understand I never had any of this planned And I know you’ve got a life And its unreasonable to think a wife Is what I could be It’s borderline delusional a history But I’ve gotta speak this longing in my heart The reverberations start When you’re near the scene And the fabric of my dream Starts to shimmer Did you use the dimmer Switch coz the light in here Is gone all moody and I fear That I may be for you over again I’m fascinated by other men But you hold this draw Like you’re the rule and the cosmic law Pulls me to your door Don’t you love me anymore?
I’ve got these pair of wings Behind a heart that sings And it spreads out to occupy There’s a part of me that will never die Coz I’ve touched upon the infinite Is it alright If I speak of the moment great When I outgrew the hate But just for an instant and then recede I tell the people but they don’t believe In what I gotta say Is it okay If I tell you a story new Of a room and vibrant blue And I found myself on the floor Drew my first breath and I adore The world I’ve been born into And it’s always been you I wanted to tell Coz I know you’ve been through some sort of hell And you’ve been by my side for an eon But there’s nothing we seem to agree on But the war we wage Could you understand if I wrote a page In testament to what you are You’re more than a burning star Coz you will never go out And I will give leave to my mouth To speak what I gotta say I love you, is that okay
The fire’s brimming full And I can’t bear the cotton wool They wrap me in Can I begin To become a star Like the way I feel afar When the rain is thundering down And I’m just driving around the town I used to call home And am I all alone Or does she care And do I dare To spill the words Like liquid ink Is it okay to think Whatever I like But, Lord, don’t give her a mic
Hopping the lines she draws in the sand I look at her and love is grand And it’s all a spectrum really I wonder if she’d ever steal me Away into the night Because she made me feel alright As we talk unto the dawn But it’s been ten years that I’m gone And she laughed out loud at stuff I said Like the man next door might want us dead Or how I had the hots for a young Blair And she had the coolest fuckin’ hair But she’s got a partner now And some beautiful children that life allows To have a mother dear And one thing is crystal clear I had a girl crush on you And I dunno, maybe I still do Though it goes against the grain I turn my face up unto the rain Just to feel the feel of it I sign my name and I quit This effortless game She said happy with her name And she deserves everything she has Showed me I don’t have to be one of the lads I can just be the quiet me A warm jumper and the tea
Live strong And let the beat hold the song Up where there are no lies From the mutant in disguise And maya does it’s best to capture But you have me in a state of rapture Ringing bells from on high And I am not afraid to die Coz it’s just a veil that we pass through Fr. P said that when we lost you To a sudden and sharp But we’re not alone in the dark We’re held somewhere we can’t contemplate And no one is locked out of that state And I’ve been knocking on the door But it was open and I adore The freedom that has come to reign Like I’ve been kissed by the pain Til all that once held a stain Washed away in sheets of rain That just pour from the sky The ground is nourished when clouds cry So why should I fear my own tears For it has been many years In a silent solitary slumber But the Divine is not going under No matter how I bury my soul Waves only know how to roll
Love, he reaches out to you And, God, I don’t know what to do But I move my feet To the tune of his beat And it’s not quite a dance Coz it’s woken from the trance And music don’t sound the same But I vibrate to the holy name Of the one who saved my life Not once but more than I’d like And I’ve been relegated in the extreme But it’s only within the dream
My Jesus opened the door He let me see that there’s something more Beyond the chasm of calls The teaching of words, the world’s enthralled And I was on my knees begging to sky Watching someone I love slowly die Why don’t you do something, where are you But you took her and put me through Some kind of hell What is it the story that you tell That the Almighty is all that exists Then why did you put me on your list And it’s a sudden awning pain Like the cold when you’ve been out in rain And I’m on the floor With my head resting against the door And a sudden spark ignites Wherefrom did all these lights Appear And I hear her say, my dear Like she always did when she was alive And her flowers didn’t survive But something she planted did, God knows It’s been living in me and it shows So I wash my face, dry my tears And I’ve been holding it in for years and years And it’s finally singing a song My Lord, you did nothing wrong And it’s more than a future reunite It’s a love that holds you in the night When you’re punching the air Cursing all that isn’t there But something new is born The moment that the fabric’s torn
I envisioned the whole scene
It was like a fuckin dream
Where I had the central role
And what's up for grabs is my soul
As I ride the subway train
Or walk Kilglass in the rain
Somehow it's all the same
I flash my metro card
And some guy helped me coz it was hard
To figure out as I traipse down the stairs
Wondering if anyone cares
And I know she does but she's got laws
It's winter and the summertime thaws
Out the vestibules of old sand
Pearls out of what was underhand
And I divide the spoils I've earned
But all my profit only burned
What was left of me
The remnants an effigy
Of a spiral diagram I sketched
But the problem hit and I retched
And sought salvation in a clinic
It looks fine from the outside but once you're in it
You come to know that there are rules
That I can't ace like I did in school
So I sit in the music room
Abject to the sound of doom
Or wander down the hall
As the world explodes from it all
How do you say kunalini, one, two, three
But they don't listen to me
I let the water percolate To pull the world out of this state And do we give with our whole hearts Or do we lead in fits and starts I know coz I see it in you But, damn, it’s not just us two And there are those in other shoes Who can’t get by without our dues And just because we’re strong Don’t mean we can’t put a foot wrong And I know the sand by the water I know the feeling of being daughter But I’ve grown to realise The permanence in temporary skies And even rain and sun Must give way to the One The Eternal Sphere It’s evidence is crystal clear Just turn within The Son of God and I am Him
I tried to run away
To put it behind me
But I love you still
So, baby don't mind me
I'm just using Oxygen
As I'm drinking the air
Fantasise a future
With you and me there
And I know you've got reasons
I know you've got time
There is an us
But I can't say you're mine
Coz you're free in your soul
You can't be tied down
And I've stopped looking rivers
Outside of time
As I drive by your flat
For the thousandth time
Does it matter that I
See the sublime
In all that we were
Or maybe could be
Never thought the Present Moment
Would be history
But I'm letting you go
And you hold on tight
It's like losing your shadow
When you miss the light
That follows me round
And shines from within
Something says awesome
In the shape of him
Photo Credit: https://pin.it/6YyAeC4
I have no enemy to speak of
When they say love is just a drug
They cannot refer to the same thing that I
Would give another and be ready to die
To protect
The whole thing seems wrecked
But there's a summer in the snow
And there are places we can't go
When we sum up the surmise
That is a horizon in my eyes
Shining even in the dark
And as I'm walking in the park
I know my saviour walks with me
Protecting me from history
As a state of mind
Just love and be kind
And let the world know who you are
Does the sun approximate a star
Or is it just far too close
Is is the Spirit or the Ghost
That I feel in the rhythm of shoes
That mark my footsteps in twos
As they hold the pavement ground
Deftly so that a sound
Issues forth from where they meet
I look up and welcome sleet
Do I speak what I have to say
Does the shaking in my hand give away
The sword that I cannot steady
But the worst is happening already
On land I see on a screen
And this is not the people's dream
To have machine gun hands facing them
Is it gonna happen again
Or can we realise
That you can't undo what dies
Once it is gone
And we've been fighting for so long
Not just with each other but within oursleves
One earns a million, another's stacking shelves
And you can say that's capitalism
Or that there's a split in the great schism
As we find what we have in common rooms
Is there a way to waylay the doom
That seems to advance from all sides
But, hey man, we're still alive
And we can still tell the tale
Of something that's not up for sale
In this thing that we've built
There's scaffolding over milk that's spilt
But as I clean up the glass
I think of something I'd never taught to ask
Are we all as one
And if we are then could the sun
Shine in every human heart
As the most expansive part
Generating compassion to a degree
I know it's not just me
That feels that something's in the mix
Fusing bonds that science splits
To generate something new for us
I believe in Love and I trust
In the human heart once more
The truth that something adore
The Poetry Book 