Search

The Poetry Book

Tag

longing

Shanghai

It was a once in a lifetime kind of a thing
And I might have a life but I’ll never have him
And you are a wonder and touch me just so
Where he left the wound that you want to go
I wish I could agree with the please in your eyes
I nod along to the flower that dies
And you give me everything I could entertain
And I know you want to ease my pain
But does that make it right to go along
When you’ve painted the picture and mastered the song
And all I need to do is slip my hand into yours
Stand by your side as you close all the doors
Hope in my heart that it is enough
To hold back the force of his tidal wave love
That wreaked such destruction on all of my plains
I called the cops but they just took names
And now I am stranded in this waste of a place
But someone sees something when they look in my face
And I want to crawl in under your arm
Cause you swore you would never do me that kind of harm
And I know in all honesty you are speaking the truth
And it’s not the first time I have loved you
But the bitterness burns in the back of my throat
As I wonder do I want to stay afloat
Cause the weather may change and the tides may rise
But he will always be God in my eyes
Bitten by a curse I cannot undo
I don’t want to inflict myself upon you
Unsteady heart that roams the seas
And kisses the waves of who I used to be
You are neat and precise and create a home
But I’m desperado and I love it alone
To come and call with flowers to your door
And say that I wish I could give you more
But he already took all that I had
What’s left are the shards and I feel so bad
That the most of what I have to offer
Is to hold your hand and think of how he thinks of her
And you’re worth true love but you don’t let me go
I look in your eyes and I feel that I know
That whatever the winds blow me in time
My feelings for you are not only mine
But surge on repeat to a lunar command
I am your friend and I think we’ll be grand
And fall into step as I catch your breath
I could be yours if you know that I met
Him as he walked blades of grass through the field
And there’s a part of my soul that never will yield
To the onslaught of this universe
I am glad of the way he made me hurt
And if that’s something you can accept
Then maybe I can be who I ought to be yet
Catch the smile to make it spread
He let me go and left me for dead
But clasped in the locket on my chain
Is a blank space waiting for a name
So maybe Poseidan won’t drown me today
I want to say thanks for not going away

A Song of Grief and Longing

There’s much variation in land masses
Always a new city
A conglomeration of buildings standing wall to wall
But when you really sit back to look at it, we’re under a sky that doesn’t care at all
And I’ve been searching with my soul in a backpack, trying to pinpoint a star
To find the spot underneath that holds the key to my heart
But whatever the patterns drawn out in a spherical sky
It’s a different shape in actuality than appears to my eye
And is not revolving the way planetariums suppose
But rather my whole world shares in one universal prose
Just another ball of rock or a living breathing being
But it has no qualms as to the tears it will streak across the picture that we’re seeing
As it hurricanes humanity with tidal wave force
We talk about protecting the planet but it shows no remorse
To an inessential species whose disposability
Terrifies the midnight of what we presume ourselves to be
And all the ancient wisdom and the markings in caves
Doesn’t stop the onslaught of what comes at me in waves
Building to a crescendo like a fire crackling sticks
I’m burning in the flames and we’re all just candle wicks
With limited lifespan getting shorter every day
You can’t decry the summer solstice and what it puts away
Just a season cyclically is my life in reverb
I’m sorry I got mad at you, it’s just you hit a nerve
When you spoke to me the truth and I finally realised
The centre of gravity coming from your eyes
And it spoke to me of the weight that I had learned to bear
And the cracks in my facade that nothing can repair
Like all searing honesty it hit me instantly
To know that I am not for you all you are to me
A bridge to the other side where somethings ushered in
The death of all that I had hoped never would begin
And a kind of comfort to see somewhere outside
A part of me reflected that I could abide
And love fervently and true and far beyond reproach
I’m falling through the shadows and you were my last hope
As infinitesimal emptiness turns monumental ache
I have long wondered what it is that wakes
And moves through this body as a ramrod guide
Forcing me to walk down paths when I would rather hide
And salvage in the yard all of my remains
See through the desperation that was fueling my pain
That set me in the car that I drove off the road
And crumpled underneath the silk of a heavy load
As mountainous the forests stood me in their stead
But when I looked up from death I found something else instead
Or rather it found me in the long lost of a cab
Trapped in the humanity of thinking you are bad
That all your faults are real and the demons that pursue
Are not phantoms insubstantial but intensely part of you
That even though the night is deep and misty black
Somewhere a light pierced through that nothing can take back
For once you have seen or been struck down wherein you stand
You can’t undo the protein chain that makes you understand
That all of life’s a bottle just bobbing in the sea
And my only mistake was thinking it was me
That moves in with the tide and out again in motion
All I am is not what is suggested by the ocean
That rhythms by the moon as we once again seek meaning
For the reasoning behind the cohesion life’s agreeing
Resting on a pinprick of knife edge subsistence
There could be no higher order when we’re committed to resistance
As we lose our lives in seeking to grapple with and hold
You can’t capture the ochre that fades the sunset gold
With ardent eyes affectionate, though you give in to stare
I still look at the space left without you there
But no matter how I try to contain the marshalled sound
There is no hiding the obviousity when you are not around
And seeping at the pores is the unmanned sovereignty
That you were not contained by your relationship to me
And the love that bound our bodies loosened and let go
It may be many years, I still miss you though
No matter what they say or the way it all conspires
I’ll kneel down and be burnt in these purifying fires
To finally succumb to the white light that I am
It was there all along I just didn’t see the plan
Or connect the dots as they speckled my vision
You cut me through the heart with clinical precision
And I found that in the beating something was alive
I don’t have to die to be by your side

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑