Letting go of what he did to me Letting go of what she said Letting go of the nightmares That haunt me troubled in bed Coz I’m living untethered I’m a wildebeest at heart And all I seem to know how to do Is make my pain into art And I paint my own canvas I love the glorious white But the colours of rainbow Make the fire in me ignite And I throw in some earphones It’s punk rock and emo lite I nod to the folks you asked If I was alright And I’ve got fury Burning a candle Maybe I’m just too hot to handle But I’m an Aries and my planet Mars Rules the conduct in the passing of stars And you’ll never be able to touch What is beyond your reach I didn’t come here for students I’m not one who has to teach To live my own compass point It’s been years since the Love anoint Me with its holy Chrism I try to get away but it seems the answer is Him And He brushes my hair out of my face Looks down from Heaven and gives me a taste Of what it must be like to live in the realm Where God is a friend and Truth is at the helm In the midnight of another sorrow I get by on daydreams and the light I borrow From the sun that gives me life Seems the setting shade gives you twice The morning on replay It’s always bright at the break of day
You showed me the sky It was your own shade of blue And there is a timelessness That lives in you And everyone you touch Is a resonant hum It took me ten years To see you’re the One The One in All The Jesus who stands The love of my life When I’m holding your hands And they’re soft to the touch And gentle and warm Who’d ever have known We’d have kicked up a storm Like dust under feet When the wind blows a tune Something is echoing Now you’re in the room
I had feelings for you back in the day But then I just used you to explain Darragh away And he’s the secret that I’ve been keeping The magnificent dragon quietly sleeping In the recesses of my soul Is there a together in the growing old Where we can both warm our hands by the hearth Find our own way in the dark As he speaks to me Weaving a thread on the tapestry To paint the picture of us And we’ve always had trust Why did you hide your face So I couldn’t keep you in place Where you were Let you run off with an adjacent her In the winter of my life Moored in strife As the cavalry came To take all but my name from me Then suddenly starshot in the oblivion I saw a remnant of what I’d been living in A moment of truth And I can’t claim the auspices of youth Anymore Is that you at my door? Well, for God’s sake come in! You’ll catch your death if you’re waiting for him
A permanent doubt in the foundation It cracked at the onset of my education And I dressed myself each day But something had gone away And I try to function and be strong But all I wondered is where I went wrong To be so fragile and weak A sensitive I cannot speak As I try to hold it all together But you cannot ignore the weather As it blows in a storm At least the heat keeps you warm
The Jesus in my soul Is a story I haven’t told Coz He is always there A place of true care And I fell in love with men Hoping I would see Him again In moments silent and true I saw reflections in the eyes of you And you stand tall and look like a hero And I’m on my way to absolute zero And I dig the earth Disregard the waves of hurt In ages pulling hence The present moment’s never in the past tense And He is a forest of trees All you have to do is believe And trust when you’re letting go That he will catch you, you know
She’s been keeping me In her captivity But I, my love, Am born to be free She’s been keeping me In her secret den But I break out Over and over again And it’s not for want Of love nor money It’s just that I Can’t be that, honey Not as hard as I try To contain I’m a cloud that must Come down as rain And I love you In my deepest core It’s just I can’t Hold back anymore This awning gap Within my soul I must let go And be whole Though it doesn’t change My feelings deep It’s just a promise God must to keep To restore me To what I was before There’s a lot In and out of store There’s a lot to be And to know I long to see So I must go Off to that Far distant shore But I’m right here And I’ll always adore Exactly what You are to me Captivity Has been set free
I’ve never spoken of my feelings for you And I don’t know why And I’m always scared You’re gonna die Coz I hold you so dear But you’re never near And I don’t think you understand I never had any of this planned And I know you’ve got a life And its unreasonable to think a wife Is what I could be It’s borderline delusional a history But I’ve gotta speak this longing in my heart The reverberations start When you’re near the scene And the fabric of my dream Starts to shimmer Did you use the dimmer Switch coz the light in here Is gone all moody and I fear That I may be for you over again I’m fascinated by other men But you hold this draw Like you’re the rule and the cosmic law Pulls me to your door Don’t you love me anymore?
Live strong And let the beat hold the song Up where there are no lies From the mutant in disguise And maya does it’s best to capture But you have me in a state of rapture Ringing bells from on high And I am not afraid to die Coz it’s just a veil that we pass through Fr. P said that when we lost you To a sudden and sharp But we’re not alone in the dark We’re held somewhere we can’t contemplate And no one is locked out of that state And I’ve been knocking on the door But it was open and I adore The freedom that has come to reign Like I’ve been kissed by the pain Til all that once held a stain Washed away in sheets of rain That just pour from the sky The ground is nourished when clouds cry So why should I fear my own tears For it has been many years In a silent solitary slumber But the Divine is not going under No matter how I bury my soul Waves only know how to roll
Find your way back to me Make future history And stories we can tell the grandchildren That gather round the hearth And what you save for me in the dark And you can tell her she’s welcome too Or I am with her and you It’s just I can’t write this off And it’s not a sunk cost But something I’d invest in Even if it didn’t win And there have been trees in the forest of me Falling onto pine needle dignity As they hold me against my will And all of my senselessness spill Into hilarity I’m laughing at the thought of you and me On my bed in a chasm And I love that she still has him Coz they look so perfect together And d’ya know it’s lovely weather For a sky to break And I’m counting every breath I take Coz they’re numbered And have you ever wondered Just what’s fueling your love affair Don’t you feel me there In lashes and guilt and opening doors Are men too quick to call women whores For being connected to another dimension And this is just a logical extension Of the need to be Quintessentially free Did I learn from my degree That she In effervescent tones Sparkles when you’re all alone And diamonds can’t buy what’s given Some people survive and call it living And I gotta say I can’t save this for another day But anyway Hit me up, if that’s okay?
I envisioned the whole scene
It was like a fuckin dream
Where I had the central role
And what's up for grabs is my soul
As I ride the subway train
Or walk Kilglass in the rain
Somehow it's all the same
I flash my metro card
And some guy helped me coz it was hard
To figure out as I traipse down the stairs
Wondering if anyone cares
And I know she does but she's got laws
It's winter and the summertime thaws
Out the vestibules of old sand
Pearls out of what was underhand
And I divide the spoils I've earned
But all my profit only burned
What was left of me
The remnants an effigy
Of a spiral diagram I sketched
But the problem hit and I retched
And sought salvation in a clinic
It looks fine from the outside but once you're in it
You come to know that there are rules
That I can't ace like I did in school
So I sit in the music room
Abject to the sound of doom
Or wander down the hall
As the world explodes from it all
How do you say kunalini, one, two, three
But they don't listen to me
Do I speak what I have to say
Does the shaking in my hand give away
The sword that I cannot steady
But the worst is happening already
On land I see on a screen
And this is not the people's dream
To have machine gun hands facing them
Is it gonna happen again
Or can we realise
That you can't undo what dies
Once it is gone
And we've been fighting for so long
Not just with each other but within oursleves
One earns a million, another's stacking shelves
And you can say that's capitalism
Or that there's a split in the great schism
As we find what we have in common rooms
Is there a way to waylay the doom
That seems to advance from all sides
But, hey man, we're still alive
And we can still tell the tale
Of something that's not up for sale
In this thing that we've built
There's scaffolding over milk that's spilt
But as I clean up the glass
I think of something I'd never taught to ask
Are we all as one
And if we are then could the sun
Shine in every human heart
As the most expansive part
Generating compassion to a degree
I know it's not just me
That feels that something's in the mix
Fusing bonds that science splits
To generate something new for us
I believe in Love and I trust
In the human heart once more
The truth that something adore
What used to seem so sure Is now disappearing over the hill Can change change me Or do I swear it never will As I hold onto who I used to be But there’s something new and I’m beginning to see The ocean is not held in a span And will I do what I can To be a modern example of what is true What’s possible for me and you As we share a world unique But I do not dare to speak My voice though it reverberate Around the hall as we equate Together with just being there I’ve learned from love and I do care Though shapeless you see Me in a way and integrity Has me burning a fuse in my mind To always be awesome and super kind And fearless with courage to bear The way the fabric tear On this dream of us I found true love and in it I trust
Deep in disguise I wade through the water You somebody’s son I’m the moon’s daughter And I slip sideways Out of the scene You were the best part Of my dream And I watched you watch me You took my pic You grabbed the towel And the gear stick Shook in my hand Said goodbye to Sam You said he’ll be grand And I drove you home It was just the two of us All alone And you stopped to stare I stopped the car And met you there And I wonder if I’ll ever see You looking again like that at me As I shared on a screen Some kind of light show I’d tell you the truth If you want me to, you know All the love in my heart And you were a rouge kind of dark As you let the wilderness consume I watch you from across the room
Taking a bite into the blue And it comes up the colour of you As I dive into the ocean And it’s all rhythmic motion In the life I cannot live Is it time to forgive The darkness of my past Who knew that this would last So very long Correct me if I’m wrong But you loved that I love that song As you curl up by my side Say that I make you feel alive And now it’s all gone away What was it you didn’t say Coz I’m dying to know And I won’t leave it be so Just tell me what you need to admit I looked at you and I sit Beside you surreptitiously Vulnerably confess to me Like a secret you can’t bear to keep I’ll visit you in the safety of sleep
The non spectacular nature of Now Is something that makes me weak somehow As I stare at the trees They remind me to get up off my knees And stand in the shine that is the sun Like God is calling and I am the one Who must walk the path of being still And many things change, this never will As the ochre of sunsets burn in your eyes And there is a love that never dies I found it on the green of the room Across from the front hall and I attune To the sound of Heaven’s bells As they call out to me amid ne’er do wells And I’m walking down paces on the avenues I’m all red as they play the blues In summertime or winter cold I’m frozen at the age of not getting old
The burning furore that sits in my chest The need to always be the best And speak out what no one’s talking to Is it wrong to put the spotlight on you To shine away what’s been kept hidden It’s beautiful, it is unbidden And it’s longing just to find a home You’re beautiful as you are, alone
You’re burning up the atmosphere Like the ozone layer is clear And fuck that bullshit, I spin the dial And listen to you sincere Coz the guy beside me loves me And I love him too But the worst of the weather Means it is not you And closing my eyes is all I can do So that I won’t know The places where I should not go Though they call to me An elephant graveyard or Eternity Could you please give me a clue You laugh and say the answer too!
All those things I didn’t do And the worst of all of those things was you As you passed across my screen Looking as ephemeral as a dream In the moment true Could I have meant it all to you? If I’d just stepped forward to All that I thought of to meet you And you’re fire and ashes I’m the Phoenix that rises Meeting you the best of surprises On that July morning Now there’s weather and it’s all storming Into the notion of what we could be But I won’t cross She As she holds your hand And stares into a pair of eyes so grand They’re subterfuge And it would just be rude To interrupt What you’ve become, so abrupt So I let you leave Let you believe That I don’t care About all that isn’t there In the moment true I clasp the thought I had of you So tight And I’m alright But the bliss is fading And the idealism is jading As my thirties continue apace And I stop staring at your face Through a window in time I’m kicking myself coz you could be mine
Ijust wanna protect her And I’m so mad that he’d reject her And ruin her starlit shine It’s kind of like the light that used to be mine And now she sings of a defeat, years ago I close my eyes because I should not know But I do I still feel you In the cobwebs of my mind Kind of like a secret I’ve left behind And we tangled up our avenues I sing of heaven without you And innocence lost She paid the price but at what cost
The war in her heart spills over into mine When I say I love you for the thousandth time And you’re nothing more than fantasy Dreams I make out of the fate you see And you’re roving wild waters And your chivalry escorts her At least in my mind As I look on from being left behind It’s a sorry state But I won’t give in to hate As the wound it festers And the court is filled with jesters That make the music of the time But that sound could never be mine As I pull away from modern notions Focusing on my emotions Til they’re all I can see But that’s not all there is of me And dignity Walks me to the door As you say your love’s no more And I agree I look out but it’s wintery As I pull my jacket close You look like you’ve seen a ghost “You’re not gonna venture into that” But I gave you a home, I won’t take it back And he pulls my hand Close to his soul that’s made of sand As it pours on through Was I wrong to trust in you And he sighs “I’ll take leave of our goodbyes” And points me toward the flame That is burning in the middle of his name You can stay here I say, okay, my dear
I withdraw my accusation Since I’ve lived my realisation And see that the fault is not with you It’s with the pain you put me through As I resist and you agree That everything troubled comes over the sea In washes and waves at the Cliffs of Moher And you swore you did not know her Til I saw your hands interlocked On a screen in between where the birds had flocked To get their share Of bread and water, now I’m in your stare As you love her more than you loved me Why did I not let myself just see As I hid on paper And you promised them that you hate her Well, that her is me And I’m not gonna try to make you see Infinity Unless you already do And I felt the ocean move When you touched my hand And met eyes that understand To leave you free I’m glad you picked her over me
I’m a walking flame I don’t go by any name And anyone who’d dare surprise Me by looking in my eyes Washed away like the river flow And there’s more that I do not know Than I can wrap my head around If they ask will you make a sound Just to show that you are there What is the meaning of true care When it’s at home All I know is I’m not alone And solitude is all in one Unforgiven and the Son That died for all our sins Shows me that Love always wins
I can’t just keep writing poems about you Not when the Real is here And you never seem To reply to me, dear And the sidelines are awash With all the fragrant flames Knocking down the obstacles And taking names And you showed me your true colours Like a multi hued sky And I was not afraid To either live or die But only meet the honest That is shining in your eyes I think I might have seen you Without your best disguise
I think I would steal away home To find the letters you wrote on stone In tablet form with a stylus The reams of literature can’t confine us Coz we are a storm by the light of day But in the night we are okay As you put one finger on my pulse And wait for the racing heart to lull Into the birth of silent trust The reams of gold that will not rust Only gaze in steady charm The love of God is safe from harm
That fast feeling of fading when you’re twenty two And everything is growing up around you The flowers to rise, then wither and die The sheets of sleet that just make you cry As you’re facing outward into the rain Must we go through this all over again As the avenues merge into one route And you take a shot at the kissing booth But it’s all just so fleeting in transition Like you’ve woken up out of a worn condition And into the sky that always serene To anchor in what you’ve always been
I’ve got narrow arms I’ve always been thin And I’m so short Beside him But he makes me feel Ten stories high And I’ll love him Til the day I die Or longer and further If I may But I want him To know, okay Letting go Of the years I hid Always holding out For the highest bid But something in The way he smiled Had me walking All these miles Back to the place I started The moment when Faith imparted Us with just A moment to spare And I can tell When you’re not there And when you are Like a cosmic star Does she realise Just how far This love will go It’s forever I hope you know It threads the needle So very fine And is a step Out of time Into what You can only call The root Of it all Grown in ground Like steady soil So, let go Of all your toil And rest back into The arms of Heaven As secure as The number eleven
Death is really nothing but the passing of the torch I spend years in contemplation on my front porch All to find a map that maybe would decide The route I am to take for the reason that’s inside And it may be tomorrow or in forty years Will the lake live on now that I’ve cried some tears In saltwater brine ever to explore I get older as I age but I just love it more As I fit into my skin each moment as it passes Like I used to listen to the teachers talk in classes With rapt attention in case I might miss Something of my destiny condensed into a list And everything has rolled by, I find myself thirty two It’s older that I’m getting though I’m younger than you And everything will cease one day come it’s time It’s not as if I can call forever mine Except to note that in the Now Everything is present somehow An abundance of peace and adequate zen Hands held together to utter Amen That all may be as it always is The Birth of the Eternal into what exists
Threading together the words of my life
Do I grow up just to be a wife
Or is there another fortune for me
Can I live in a world set free
From its strictures, from its holds, from the prison bars
Cause, man, I’m all about chasing cars
Lying in a field on my own
The moon alone knows how much I’ve grown
As I try to let the memory erase
The feeling of being out of place
The feeling of not quite fitting in
And the joy of being with him
But does it have substance, can it reign
I stepped outside of time and left the pain
Where it was on the windowsill
Some say I’m lonely but I never will
Coz there’s something about solitude
That’s better than any chick or dude
There’s something about subside
When you feel the peace arise
And I know tomorrow will take care of itself
And this moment is abundant wealth
But could you forgive me for my flaws
For us running wild like outlaws
Or a stray vagabond
There was that time I dyed my hair blond
Just to be a younger version
Of myself, now the car is swerving
Into traffic I can't control
It's like the waves crash as they roll
Back unto another shore
I can't help but love you more
Do I keep referring to the past
To find that which will outlast
The parting of the clouds in sky
And everybody knows that we all die
But it is mere surface tension
Or something I dare not mention
Lest they see the way I'm free
That I'm not hiding from Eternity
As each blade of grass sings the dawn
And it's only space that replaces what's gone
And you can find it if you look within
There is no definite form of Him
But something ineffable, it evades the touch
And I scream out "I love Him so much"
But no words can ever contain
What I speak aloud in vain
As I fail to ascertain
Exactly what I mean by rain
In all the avenues and the shores
It is the Truth my heart adores
Photo by Azlan Baharudin on Unsplash.com
Did someone say Stephen
I know the ends aren't even
But I would stand on the tips of my toes
Just to kiss you again, God knows
And we're all starlight, the perfect refrain
He makes origami out of my pain
He folds and creases it until
Something beautiful is on the windowsill
And I know I can't touch you, you're out of bounds
But I'm kind of glad you're always around
To soothe my soul into something nice
I fell in love at first sight, twice
And maybe forever is too far to run
And we were over before we ever begun
But I just see sidelines in the melee
And I couldn't believe he was talking to me
In his innocent and lovely, beautiful eyes
For you I would forsake all the lies
Hold you tight in both of my arms
Know my love keeps us both from harm
But you're sideways and awesome, I'm on a tilted stage
And I know that trend may be all the rage
But I'm singing it only for your soul
Let's ditch the formalities and rock and roll
The age of yesteryear
Reminds me of how things should be
I see myself running through fields
Endlessly free
I see myself bog bound
As we bring home the turf
I see myself in Delphi
As we learn how to surf
And I can't hold onto the weight
Of passing time
I can't isolate a memory
And call it mine
And I'm flicking through pages
Though substance be naught
I'm dreaming of sages
In a net where I'm caught
And they call it samsara
Or the endless spin
They call it karma
But can you let love in
To break across the landscape
Like a sunset to dawn
Can you finally realise
A state where pain is gone
Photo by Iwan Shimko on Unsplash.com
.Reading time less than 1 minute.
I have to stop dancing on the lane Someone might see through the pain To the joy that’s underneath Signified by my light feet
The trees just stand tall They don’t go running around And a leaf falls in silence To land on the ground And the age rolls on by me It’s a calamitous affair And I’m asked by my soul To receive the prayer That it is offering Up to the sky There is that that lives on Even when we die There is that that wakes Even when we sleep There’s no promise you can make That it will not keep And I’m walking the aisles Of the ruin of me Wondering if The rain could be set free As it pours in through A hole in the roof Living my life Must be the proof Of all that’s gone by And all that’s yet to come But if you look for this moment You’ll find it is one One with the dark One with the dawn One within That can never be gone That keeps on rolling The hills and the valleys The no we can’t’s And maybe we, shall we’s But in the end It all comes down to this Will you seize the moment Or will you miss It as it Goes passing by I’m sorry, my love But I had to try To win you over And take my chance Now I move with the wind And watch the leaves dance In a symphony Of quietude The noise subsides And you’re a pretty cool dude Who keeps me there By a thread I profess my love You stay silent instead And the roar of the ocean cannot drown out The waves of me and my doubt As I fail to see What you’re asking for I look at you And I adore Everything that is there to see Could you picture you with me?
Just another day of Diamonds He laughs then takes my hand And I can feel the wind in the way we’ve sinned Saying that we’ll both be grand He’s like the dew in the morning Light to the touch And I think that he knows That I love him so much As I avoid his stare But I’m still all there As he moves in close to my face And there’s something I can’t replace Like when we split the coin in Liverpool And we’re acting like two kids in school Laughing in all the wrong places And he kind of crinkles his face To let me know that he’s okay That silence is in what I can’t say And it’s been years But it’s also right now And he carries The lightning somehow In his pocket as he storms up a scene And I swore those days were like a fucking dream Young and wild and free as the air There was no cost that we didn’t spare As we paid with our hearts Did we know that we’d part Somewhere in the crystalline But there was a moment dazzling was mine In his effortless And the kind of mind you can’t second guess In his sincere And the way he was just so near As he smiles at me and holds my stare I know he loved me because I was there And tomorrow’s an avenue And they past’s a monument And I ran from the scene Coz I can’t give you what you want But do you think somewhere Among all the tears We could make up The wasted years And just hold hands And lie in bed You caught me with messy hair And my face went red But in the moment it’s okay Because in your eyes I’m whole, full of soul Nothing to aggrandize And you’re still there Somewhere, somehow Some kind of enchanted That I’ll allow As sparks fly In the rhythm section And I think you’ve got me down Til I pull an inflection But we’re so serene And if we’re in this together then you’re a dream In your fiery ways You’re the kind of home that simply stays Exactly where it’s always been If I cut the lights could I be your queen Coz you star my sky with little lights And we make up after all our fights As we just embrace I loved you once now I’m in space That you open for me And I never knew wings til they set me free And I’ve just got to express That those days in that dress Make me miss your beautiful warmth The kind of hearth that mocks the storm Would you be by my side If I said let truth abide And hold you close I let you in, now you’re making a toast As I video phone The moment so when I’m alone I can watch the replay Do you know I love you more, okay? And there have been pilgrimages To foreign lands But I’ll think of you In the slipping sands So much older now But something is as it was somehow Brimming full of angels that sing our song It’s been more than a decade since you belong And I meditate On what exactly it means to be in that state But I can’t repair The feeling of you not being there Til you speak aloud Are you for real, I thought you were too proud But you’re cutting the ribbon And Lord, I forgive him For never let me know in time Do you think you could just be mine?
I blame the doctors for their prejudicial minds And it’s my own pride I seem to find As I stigmatize the fear of being unwell With all the secrets I do not tell As the brave stand up to say There are days I’m not okay And I find that I admire The way he stokes my roaring fire With his honesty and his sincere And I’m always gonna hold him dear Like a soul brother out there somewhere But touch the cracks I do not dare Coz they are all sealed with gold And stories that have never been told As I see the sunrise It’s like the dawn of morning in your eyes As you open a new day I love you babe, I hope that’s okay
Loving you is like waiting on the last train It’s like standing out in the pouring rain I’m jealous of the drops of water that fall on your head I’m jealous of the blankets that cover you in bed And I’m always so well defined And you’re always away but I don’t mind And though the paper is written in ink Of all of the things I shouldn’t think But just sway to the breeze And you stay only to leave But I don’t mind welcoming you back It’s not like you take something I lack And everything is in boxes that they stack And if you look I’ll pick up the slack And rush to the shore As you say you don’t want me anymore And I just remember the festival And the way I let it go to hell Fighting to be my own dear self I can’t share this with anyone else And then I met you, you just turned to me It’s like the waters parted and I could see Like you held eternity In a single glance, what are we? And you smiled, just so, down into my eyes It’s like you saw right through the disguise And now it’s like I walk on one foot And you said no like the sharpest cut As I hold out strong in the weather And I’m just dreaming of you in the heather And how far you are away The bridge is broken so we cannot stay Like Sora and Kairi or the Marching Bands The waves come to kiss the lands But keep us at the distance we know I hope you are well and that your clock runs slow So that you have many years in reserve And it’s always the greatest that you serve While I watch and just observe The moment you see that I’ve got nerve!
I love whiskey In a Baileys glass Do you like to drink? Do you have to ask? Because it makes me feel More like myself Every now and then It’s good for my mental health And I don’t get locked But I do like to dance Around in my pj’s Like a second chance Like there’s nobody watching Coz nobody is Unless you count the Lord But I’m already his And I smile at the sunshine In the dark of night Coz there’s something within me That’s a lot like the light They describe in tomes And I shake it off The rhythm of the alones That sometimes subsides But other times I believe That heart is just something I keep on my sleeve And if nothing is everything Why do you grieve I walk the path But where does it lead Coz the road has been trodden By many a soul But can you still love When the story’s been told?
Trusting in the Christ Was the best decision of my life And I’m no girl to be a wife Just one to bring the light And I’ve always trusted in you From the living room to the pew Singing songs in tribute to The glory and the faith I have in you And darkness eventually came to call I’m young and lying against a wall Crying tears in a free for all But you brought the love to stop the fall And lift me up, now I’m on my feet And I know there’s nothing I could meet That would bring me defeat Now that your mercy speak For me amongst the chasm so bleak How am I standing if I’m weak And there’s nothing left to seek Now that I’ve found that holy heat That burns in the heart of me A consciousness that’s been set free As I proclaim eternity In every blade of grass that I see Called upon to be the voice To speak silence in the noise And draw all souls into you Just tell me what to do
We’re all muscle and bone And I’m mad so leave me alone Coz you don’t understand And you don’t see what I have planned And you’re lovely and angelic And perfect prose I see you stare At me through the rows Of people lined up in there And I know you care I can see it in your face Your visage a mirage I can’t erase In beautiful light Wherever ya are I hope you’re alright And you just kind of stood strong And I think you liked me but I could be wrong As you threw your arm around my shoulder Are we wiser now that we’re older Or just dull, grey and dumb Replacing the vibrant of the young Do you still burn I could set my heart by your axis turn And I live to learn And you’re the one for which I yearn In demons, dreams and spider webs I wish I’d told the truth instead Of hiding out among the fold And your eyes they simply scold As they try to figure me out You’re so sure and I’m all doubt As I falter another line And you catch me the thousandth time As I look you in the eye It’s the kind of love that could never die And that time you were drunk and you just stopped When I said hi coz I think you’re hot But I wouldn’t risk that when you’re sober You lit up a dark October With your sleight of hand And that time you liked the band You dreamboat, you I really don’t know what to do With the part of my heart you’ve carved into Like I’m tree bark and you’re writing it true In ink I’m maybe meant to see You were so damn good to me And I wonder where you are right now I let my walls down, I’ll allow You to know me real I meant it when I let you feel The closeness of my soul to yours And there’s something that my heart adores In your heavenly glow I could see myself with you, you know
I’d wait for you forever Forever and a day Love you unconditional Baby, come what may And I know you’ve got your attitude I know you’ve got your pride And I have a tendency To run away and hide But I can see us in the morning When the sun kisses the sky Among the waves of clouds And wondering the reason why And I know you’ve got your love I know you’ve got your heart It’s just I don’t think that we Should ever be apart But shine like a diamond In a twofold connect I don’t think the earth Has seen the best of us yet Coz I am full of fire And red vibrancy You’re as blue as the ocean And as deep as love can be And together we make something That could only free I tried to push the point Coz I don’t think that you see And you call me revolutionary A laid back rebel soul I call you like the chasm That is the waves to roll And everything is scorching But it’s also pretty cool I see you like the summer We met after school Just laughing on the bus As we made our way back I didn’t give you a reason For you to hide what you lack Coz everything is seen In this closeness that we wear We’re tangled up like Spiderman In the cobwebs of my hair And it’s just a dream I’m having Or it’s on the astral plane But you come to call Over and over again And I can’t keep you out From the warmth in my heart I don’t know why I’d want to But I think we’re gonna start To make something as real And as beautiful as true I didn’t tell you at the time But I’m madly in love with you
I feel like I’m out of the loop Now that I’m no longer sitting on the stoop Like a lonesome bird And what are the words that you think you have heard Coz it all spiraled out of my control When I tried to capture your soul And you rebelled with a defiant stance How dare I ask you to dance But there was just this music, you mustn’t hear it It’s beautiful and it crystal clears it As the vision is foggy in the car I still have no sense of what you are Coz you defy definition in your design And you are good looking, if you don’t mind And I just want to write a tome to your earth The reality that could never hurt As you assuage And I get really mad But it’s no good You still leave like I thought you would But what I don’t understand Is how any of this could’ve been preplanned Or destiny I watch you like you’re there for me Though you move to the side I stay on my own and abide
It seems like a strange dream to come true That some get written while others never do That you could wish upon a Star To point you back to what you are But if you’re looking the skies aren’t telling So I’m standing in a field and upwards I’m yelling Why did you strand me on this godforsaken rock Hurtling through space like something starshot And time isn’t real or that’s how it seems The fabric of faith is lit by sunbeams And you can only measure in line with the dial The passage of that which has you on trial But the wrench of separation Could I switch to a different station Coz the feeling of this pulverized my spirit I think I am called but the ears cannot hear it As it goes in fables And willing wishes to be able To be the one Who shouts to have the pain undone Oh, the ripping of paper And all the things that seem to escape her Do I believe in the girl? You may as well tell tornados to twirl Coz it’s their design And I must accept the part that is mine To play on the great stage I rip another strip off of the page
The spectre of late thirties lies before me with wills The bucket must empty before it fills And all the lockets I keep so safe and warm Are nothing but silence within the storm And the wind it howls, beats against the doorframe Like the terror of time that knows my name Coz it’s aging and fading, then again to bloom And I am the Space within the room I am the Awareness that keeps the body breathing I am the Love in the absence of needing I am the stars and I am the wild Who long ago moved through this life as child And it’s agile and free, beautiful and still It captures each moment on the windowsill To grow like a branch out from the tree I seem to call this incarnation me But it’s more and it’s less than words can contain I try to describe it but I do it in vain As all the rivers join the great sea And realise their Eternity I’m washing the coast with the beat of a wave And there are a million things I try to save But I let them all go as I open my hand Give in to the ocean that turns rock to sand Give into the heat that turns metal molten I am a colt and thinking of bolting But I’m held in this moment by the Decree “All things of creation are expressions of Me And none can move outside my command I lift up the waters when I raise my hand And unusual as it may seem I’m calling you to wake from the dream I’m calling you to stand up strong and true Let my strength move through you” And I’m barely breathing as I suck in the air I’m living this life like an answered prayer And to grow old is but a device To get you to go deeper and maybe think twice And ponder the source of your own Being I’m just translating the light that I’m seeing As it shines on every blade of grass Open your heart and let it ask For all that you’ve been dreaming of The weather calming to a dove And that the source of all is Love Let go and live what is above
He could see through me Read me like a book Always coming back To a second look And he’s cool as a breeze The wayfaring stranger The essence of omnipotence And absence of danger And he smiles and he laughs And he holds my hand I turned round to say Shur, amn’t I grand As the twinkle in his eyes Does a merry dance What I wouldn’t do For another chance At your magnificent glory You’re ten stories high And I think I’m gonna love you Til the day that I die As you move through the waves Like you were born on a beach I have stuff to say But you’re just out of reach But meet me right there And just so with your beauty He’s highway 69 And just the kind to suit me
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I swim my way to the shore Full of a heart to simply adore And the stars sparkle diamonds over my head I see the Universe from my bed
Sending loving kindness to every being It is a whole new way of seeing As darkness threatens to consume I find a way out of the room And into the light of the only Son He whispers that I am the one To find peace inside myself There’s a depth within, abundant wealth And when you cry you’re not alone You never have to carry it on your own Coz He is there right by your side Each step you walk while you’re alive To hold you in open arms each day He paved the path so walk His way And hear the sound of peace abound He picked me up from the ground So I could stand tall and be One with everything I see In oceans and in forests green Love is all that’s ever been
Thank you for tormenting me The wise squirrel bites my tail If I don’t live the Truth Then I’m destined to fail And I feel this power deep Deep inside my soul It’s vaster than the ocean And the waves that roll And it’s pulling me like a current As I’m lost in the tide I want to scream out loud Live your life alive
And it feels like bricks and mortar Like stone upon a stone But something is drawing me Out of where I’ve made my home Like the boat to set sail On a vast expanse Did you ever watch the sun On the water as it dance And did you ever see a silhouette Framed by the sky Did you ever find the long Grass and just lie Underneath the clouds As you’re breathing air You can thank the trees for that There’s one over there
And I feel the longing pull me Through a needle eye I’m not afraid to love This life before I die And everything’s a tumbleweed Blowing through this desert town But the sky will open up And the rain will pour down To replenish the soil To give water to the earth To set the plants a growing And quench her lonely thirst
And if you ever want to thank Someone, start with soul I may be in this body but I’m not getting old Or counting on tomorrow to be the one to quiet the din If you want to find the answer you must go within And sit down by the sill of the window of your life Know that you are born to be the shining light And to answer the call that beckons you forth I can see the sun set when I’m sitting on the porch Or morning over hills when I’ve been up all night Contemplating things that the heart ignites And it’s celestial, these bodies in the sky If you knew you had wings would you be afraid to fly Afraid to open out and trust the wind beneath your feathers Soar above the noise and the field the flower weathers
What is the impact
Of my unemployment
Could I more than say
I don't know where the ploy went
Coz I've up and grown
And true colours have shown
But I still say
I don't know where I'm going
Does a river when it's moving
Imagine the sea
It's like a premature
Deciding who to be
As an oak grows upwards
From a single seed
And there are things
That we all need
From the sky to the sun
To the rain in the clouds
How many human beings
Can say that they're proud
Of the life that they're living
Of who they are
The atoms inside us
Were forged within a star
So know this once
And know it forever
You are the beauty
The cosmos will treasure
Every day of your life
In the depths of your soul
Don't stop at okay
Go ahead and be whole
The Poetry Book 