The Dark

"Don't touch it"
Everyone seems to say
But I love the dark 
It is deep and endlessly long
It is peaceful and pure
In its nothingness

Combustion

I have a propensity to fall for dark eyed men
The kind you love then never see again
Don’t know what it is about their twisted souls
But there’s a depth I can’t plumb and I am sold
As you watch the light dawn in someone’s else’s eyes
Their sensitivity cracks and to your surprise
They break wide open into your hands
And look at you as though no one understands
As if you’ve been admitted to their confidence strange
But you’re at the mercy of what will change
As the sands shift the ground under your feet
It was only that one time that we got to meet
And though they throw reputations like yours to the dirt
They can’t make me regret the way that it hurt
The perfect pain to stand on your stage
Realising I’m a scene on the previous page
And I’m left in the wings just to look on
At what never was mine and now is long gone
To think I could hold your soul in my palm
The silence belying a deadly calm
Like standing in the eye of a hurricane
Two seconds later it’s ripped apart again
But though you protest to innocent degrees
About what you meant, I do not believe
Though you may try to conquer the sea
Doesn’t mean you can escape what you are to me
As oceans swell and fall back with the tide
I signed up for it all so I’m down for the ride
And if it may happen the moment perchance
I’ll just be the post script you tried to romance
And emotionally abuse what you have found
I have to admit I love when you’re around
Because for all the lies you conceal with a stare
You cannot hide what I know is there
And hidden beneath each surface I touch
Is someone within and I love you so much
Though they may call it codependency
They never saw horizons like you and me
And clipped are their wings as they settle for less
Than the subtle perfection in my distress
So don’t regret what you cannot achieve
I am forever bound to the darkness you weave
And what is real will stand monumental
You’re not a bad guy just cause you are gentle
And let your voice drop so soft and low
I only hate what I don’t want to go
Cause you can’t abstain from all you desire
I never want to be the one to put out your fire
Ephemerality and the lack of constraint
Are all a part of the picture you paint
And I guess I just wished I could be the one
To unlock the chains so you’d come undone
And relish the life that makes you what you are
But I am only light fusion bound within a star
An effortless firefly in the cosmos complete
I was born to be gracious in defeat
And find the source of the unquenchable longing
The home to fulfil my sense of belonging
The ache that never seems to go out
But you soothe it so easily with your mouth
And the words that spill from your lips
Dash on the rocks as my mask slips
Into trust and vulnerability
As you perceive strength in my fragility
And though there is substance in all you portray
They just write you off as consuming your prey
But I could never object to being such quarry
Or bend the knee to say that I am sorry
Though you steal from me all I ever had
The reality of you could never be bad
Never knew what it meant til I got you alone
You are the crack in my heart of stone
A weakness no one can repair
The mark you left will always be there
And they say don’t suffer just as evidence
But I’ve always lived this way because I can’t condense
My feelings into a digestible form
I may be an ice princess but my blood is warm
A reminder of what is eternally true
In the cynicism we’ve grown through
And that somewhere, somehow a celestial being
Once gave me the gift of what he was seeing
To be revolved in perceptual bliss
I only grieve the things that I miss
And even loss can be profound
When you listen to the open sound
And realise in space and time
You can’t always make matter of what is divine
And claimed by death must always be
The starcrossed lovers of destiny

The Monumental Fire

I guess I just got caught in a monumental fire
One that burns me up and never seems to tire
Of eroding me right down to my core
I look to you for help and you tell me I need more
And I guess that you were scared of what I had to offer
Cause it threatened all you had and you needed something softer
But sorry I am made of magnetic steel
And there is no tempering how I feel
Like an ocean, like the sea, like an iceberg standing lone
I always seem to be missing my quintessential home
And I just thought you had it cause when I fell into your arms
You quieted my thoughts and silenced my alarms
And I felt a strange sort of peace descend on my soul
Like I had found the one thing I depend on to be whole
And how you matched my heart with your delicately so
I would have given all I had if you didn’t have to go
And leave me to depart on some far flung trek
I would have walked out on a wire and risked my neck
But to hear you deny me like I never even existed
Took more strength than I owned to have resisted
Crying out for the other half of who I am
And praying that you would understand
But your gaze turned icy cold
And I could see my entitlement in the way I started to fold
And break like that and come apart at the seams
I had always believed in the reality of dreams
And that what was foretold would come to pass
And that one time only love could do nothing but last
But the chains encroached and wrapped around like vines
And I couldn’t speak when you declared you were not mine
But belonged to another and were bonded at the core
When you know it is impossible you only want it more
But I let the full weight of it break my wooden frame
As I conceded to myself I was in love with a name
That stood for a symbol that I was longing to be
What I loved about you is you accepted me
With no conditions and no rules, no, just as I am
So when I shattered the stone I thought you would understand
But it seems there’s only so much you can take
And I will never speak to you again for your own sake
So go live your own life full of happiness and wonder
And I’ll remember how you moved my earth with your rolling thunder
How you cascaded rain down the panes of my vision
And how you hit me in the heart ruthlessly and with precision
And how you struck me on the spot and made me to be
The living embodiment of my own destiny